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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think this is strange from my neighbour?

470 replies

Pekitothebunny · 02/01/2025 10:43

This morning I woke up to a pack of Christmas cards that have been posted through my door. They are new Christmas cards, still sealed within their pack, unused. A note came with it saying “hi, it’s Janet from number 5. I bought these for you to send out to the neighbours next year”

Huh? Why would anyone do that? She’s isn’t my direct neighbour, she’s like 4 houses down. We don’t speak or have any kind of relationship. However, since we moved in a few years ago she has always sent us a Christmas card, and I assume she sends them to everyone on the street. We don’t bother with Christmas cards and never send them out. Could it be that she’s offended that we never send cards so this is her not so subtle way of hinting that she will be expecting a card from us in 2025?? Why would anyone care so much?

Im planning on just throwing the cards away and ignoring it. Would anyone else find this weird?

OP posts:
Original poster
Pekitothebunny · 02/01/2025 13:19

boredsolicitor · 02/01/2025 13:10

Please let us know what you decide to do and the neighbours reaction- I'm over invested in this strange behaviour!

I might ask my next door neighbour if they received any from her. I’m hesitant to go and speak to her because I don’t think she’s particularly pleasant. Earlier in the year, DP and I were putting stuff in the car to take to the tip and a delivery driver knocked on her door. She answered and was very rude to him, saying that the ring doorbell works perfectly fine and she didn’t spend so much money on it for it not to be used. Might not sound so bad, but it was her tone of voice as well. When I first moved in I knocked on her door to ask if she had taken a parcel in for me because the driver didn’t specify which neighbour he has left it with. She responded to say that she doesn’t take in parcels for neighbours. So I just think she’s a bit of a funny bugger

OP posts:
heartsinvisiblefury · 02/01/2025 13:19

Tink3rbell30 · 02/01/2025 10:52

Its polite to send a card back, no excuse not to.

Not if you don't send cards. Why should you do something you don't want to because someone else does it?

ABigBarofChocolate · 02/01/2025 13:20

My neighbours are as crazy. Some people just can't help being pushy or rude. Apparently.

housethatbuiltme · 02/01/2025 13:20

I would post them back with an equally passive aggressive note saying 'thank you for your gesture but with the current state of the environment we opt out of creating unnecessary excess waste so deliberately do not partake. Please do not feel obligated to send us further cards in future and merry christmas'.

TMGM · 02/01/2025 13:21

Post them back through her door, no explanation needed.

user1492757084 · 02/01/2025 13:22

Poke them back into her mailbox.
Sorry, as you know I don't send out Christmas cards. You will make better use of them than me.
Happy New Year! from no 11. smileyface.

She possibly delivered a few packets in the neighbourhood.. Is she a lonely person?

heartsinvisiblefury · 02/01/2025 13:23

@Tink3rbell30 are you the neighbour?

Tink3rbell30 · 02/01/2025 13:24

heartsinvisiblefury · 02/01/2025 13:23

@Tink3rbell30 are you the neighbour?

Why does someone always ask this silly question? The OP would have said if the neighbour had seen the post.

MzHz · 02/01/2025 13:24

Dfg15 · 02/01/2025 10:45

I'd be very tempted to put them back through her letterbox with a note saying that you don't send cards to anyone, so will not need them to send to neighbours.

100% this.

heartsinvisiblefury · 02/01/2025 13:25

@Tink3rbell30 because you sound as if you are by what you are saying. It's a joke.

Mrsbloggz · 02/01/2025 13:27

I would post them back with a brief thanks but I don't need them. And then not engage further.

Inthebleakmidwinter1 · 02/01/2025 13:27

I would keep them and give them back one by one at Christmas each year😂

Tink3rbell30 · 02/01/2025 13:28

heartsinvisiblefury · 02/01/2025 13:25

@Tink3rbell30 because you sound as if you are by what you are saying. It's a joke.

Every single post I read someone says it to someone though 😂🤦‍♀️

FrogOnAYuleLog · 02/01/2025 13:28

WaitingforStrike · 02/01/2025 10:46

I like her style! Has it never occurred to you to send her one back, in the years she's been giving them to you? Good manners surely.

Oh please. Why hasn't it occurred to neighbour not to send one to OP, after not having received one in return all these years?

amoreoamicizia · 02/01/2025 13:28

I'm not sure exactly what you should do but don't go and speak to her if you already have had nasty exchanges with her, it'll be bound to not go well.

If you post them back with a note she'll also use that as ammunition and probably go about telling others how awful your reaction was to her kind gesture etc.

ElaborateCushion · 02/01/2025 13:29

Inthebleakmidwinter1 · 02/01/2025 13:27

I would keep them and give them back one by one at Christmas each year😂

Came to add the same comment!

How many cards are in the pack? I'd put one back through her door each year, unwritten with an unwritten envelope. Hopefully she gave you a pack of 10 at least so you get 10 years' worth out of it

That's so weird!

Winterskyfall · 02/01/2025 13:30

Don't throw the cards away, just pop them back through her door with a note. 'Thanks for the thought, we don't do Christmas cards though and I don't want them to go to waste.'

Cornettoninja · 02/01/2025 13:30

NameChanger91736 · 02/01/2025 12:58

I mean it's no more ridiculous than letting someone send you a card for years and ignoring it

Are you the forceful card giver? 😅

Show quote history

Accept and reciprocate my festive greetings and goodwill. ACCEPT THEM! Xmas AngryXmas Angry

lightsandtunnels · 02/01/2025 13:31

haha Janet sounds unhinged.

I would definitely pop a note on them as PPs have suggested with a 'we don't send cards but appreciate the thought' kind of thing and post them back to her.

EdithBond · 02/01/2025 13:33

Pekitothebunny · 02/01/2025 13:19

I might ask my next door neighbour if they received any from her. I’m hesitant to go and speak to her because I don’t think she’s particularly pleasant. Earlier in the year, DP and I were putting stuff in the car to take to the tip and a delivery driver knocked on her door. She answered and was very rude to him, saying that the ring doorbell works perfectly fine and she didn’t spend so much money on it for it not to be used. Might not sound so bad, but it was her tone of voice as well. When I first moved in I knocked on her door to ask if she had taken a parcel in for me because the driver didn’t specify which neighbour he has left it with. She responded to say that she doesn’t take in parcels for neighbours. So I just think she’s a bit of a funny bugger

Show quote history

I was going to say ask your neighbours if the same’s happened to them. But maybe they send her a card back.

She doesn’t sound very friendly, but some people can be snappy when depressed, menopausal, lonely etc. IMHO it’s best to always be kind and friendly to neighbours and in my experience they always are back, even if this is in their own way.

A lot can be lost in nuance, but comes across to me she believes it’s the ‘done thing’ as a friendly gesture to send cards to neighbours a few doors either side and finds it unfriendly if people don’t reciprocate. That’s why I’d make it clear you’re not being unfriendly - you don’t send anyone cards.

JessicafelloffTheKnappett · 02/01/2025 13:34

Tink3rbell30 · 02/01/2025 13:24

Why does someone always ask this silly question? The OP would have said if the neighbour had seen the post.

Show quote history

And how would the OP know that the neighbour saw the post??
You made a silly comment and it deserves all the ridicule 🙄 of course it's not a requirement to send one back!

dragonfliesandbees · 02/01/2025 13:34

Pekitothebunny · 02/01/2025 11:28

No, we don’t receive cards from anyone else on the street. So I doubt she gets cards off anyone else either… so not sure why she has just selected us to buy these cards for. Unless everyone on the street this morning has woken up to a fresh pack of Xmas cards and a note through their door 😆

Show quote history

OP you need to find out if this is the case. I'm invested! Please ask your other neighbours. Thanks.

Lightswitchup · 02/01/2025 13:36

I have a really odd neighbour and can imagine her doing something like this. She presumably doesn’t realise how odd it is. I would do as pp have said and just put it back with a cheery ‘thank you but no thank you’.

User860131 · 02/01/2025 13:38

NovemberMorn · 02/01/2025 13:09

Talk about escalating a situation.🙄

Show quote history

It isn't 'escalating' the situation it's making a very clear statement to this silly cow of a neighbour that you're not going to be pushed around. I know this middle class hyacynth buquet type well. They're uncivilised bullies in their own way. They're just perhaps more subtle about it than people who are less economically advantaged. However they feed off people not challenging their awful behaviour. 'Escalating' it would be going over there and shouting at them or putting the cards through a paper shredder and posting the bits through their letter box or slashing their tyres. What I suggested is just letting them know you've got their number as politely as possible IMO

mangochutneyjar · 02/01/2025 13:44

She responded to say that she doesn’t take in parcels for neighbours. So I just think she’s a bit of a funny bugger

Well there you go then- she is perfectly happy asserting that she wont take parcels in for neighbours (which is of course, her right) so you have every right not to send cards! Cuts both ways

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