Removing shoes

[Couldntthinkofausername24]

Am I the arsehole for asking people to remove their shoes?

Since we bought our house in 2017 we have never allowed shoes upstairs or in the front room. In the front room we have a huge shaggy rug and the stairs and upstairs are carpeted.

Our front door opens in to the dining room which is wood floor and I had no issue with people being in their with shoes on. Fast forward to now, I have a 1 year old who picks up absolutely anything in sight, the last thing being a piece of dog shite. So now shoes are completely banned in my home and my god has this caused upset amongst folk!

We have ample space to remove and store shoes and a bench to sit down to do so.

I'm not posh or pretentious in any way but is it really such a huge deal to respect our house

Im prepared for a proper mums net roasting also

I wonder if it's more common in the countryside for people to remove shoes.
The outside is dirtier (in a nice countryside way) than in cities?

Thinking about the homes I've been in recently:
Swimming group Xmas do - shoes off (carpet and tiles)
Book club Xmas do - shoes off (wooden)
Family - shoes on (wooden)
Other family - shoes on (wooden - has a dog)
My home - shoes off (carpet)
Other family - shoes off (wooden)
Family - shoes on (wooden and heavy duty dog friendly carpet)

Where I live, anyone from the village walking to my home could well step in dog poo (not often thankfully, but we all know it happens), grass/mud from the footpaths which come straight down from the fields.
Even just outside my house if it's been raining, the little shingle and whatever general grime is under the shingle settles on the path.

I prefer shoes off but I'm not rigid about it
My dad struggles so I would never ask him too and he always wipes his feet before coming in

Basically do what you want, bring your slippers and PJs if you're comfy!

These are our typical streets and paths - plus you’re fined if you don’t pick up after your dog.

I don’t allow shoes in my home and I know lots of other people have the same rule. All my friends of East Asian / Arab descent do so culturally.

Your house, your rules. People who don’t like it can stay outdoors.

When I was growing up in and out of modest houses, council houses and much posher grander homes the only house with shoes off was an Austrian lady

I've got quite a lot of friends, relatives and acquaintances, yet I've never once been expected to take off my shoes when visiting their houses, nor would I ask them to do so in mine. Sometimes I wonder if I live in a different world from the people on here!

It’s quite a sweeping statement for a whole country, maybe my Canadian family and their friends are different to the entire rest of Canada, but that seems unlikely. They tend to have hard floors and an open plan kitchen, dining, living area so they keep shoes on in those areas when the weather is nice. Other times, you change footwear for the weather.

Thank you for saying this! I couldn't agree more - please please let's not let the solution to this be lots of single use plastic shoe covers (for anyone other than decorators etc)!

Shoes off in our house generally speaking, except in the hall & kitchen which have hard floors. My in laws keep slippers here, and some other older friends being slippers when they come round for a drink in the evening. Our rule is mostly for ourselves, as we do a lot of gardening and outdoor sports and it's just easier to make sure we always take shoes / boots off than to expect kids to stop and think about what shoes they're wearing and how mucky they are. I've found all visiting kids and friends of our generation take shoes off without being asked.

I wish to god I’d done what you do op, I have to clean the floors daily/ almost twice a day. We have a dog which doesn’t help but it’s more the doors I sometimes need to go outside so we ended up not going it

I was thinking about this the other day- I went for a walk in the village I used to live in as a child and walked past the house my friend lived in. I remarked to DP that her family was unusual back then as they were a very strict 'shoes off' house with pale carpets all over. All other friends had houses where shoes were worn indoors, as in mine.

I don't know if this was because of the generation I grew up in (I'm 56 now), the size of the houses (we're a 6-sib family so lived in a big house, and most friends had similar) or some other reason, but shoes on seems to have become a lot more prevalent over subsequent years.

I'm still in the shoes on camp, as are most of my friends and all of my family, but we have hard-wearing, appropriate floor coverings that can withstand foot traffic. I change into slippers when I come home but that's down to comfort.

For tradesmen I lay down old sheets or they bring their own heavy-duty floor covering if they need to be in and out over carpeted areas.

I have wooden floors but Large Oriental rugs in the living areas except for the kitchen. So it is shoes off. I do have a supply of inexpensive slippers if anyone wants the which get tossed after being used. Mostly used by my girl friends if they are in hose otherwise the go about in socks

Not unreasonable in the slightest.
Wearing outdoor shoes anywhere inside the house is gross.

@BPinCT do you bin the slippers every time? Like disposables?

We’re a no shoes house. I wouldn’t dream of going to someone’s house and leaving my shoes on either. They come straight off at the door unless the home owner insists I leave them on (which very occasionally happens).

It makes me cringe when I watch Location x3 and see them all leaving their shoes on and trailing upstairs into carpeted rooms in them. Same when we had people viewing our house. My mother dragged me up well.

Yes, I do bin the slippers every time. I feel that if I ask guest to not wear their shoes and they want slippers rather than padding about shoeless, they deserve clean slippers every time I do have some frequent visitors who have taken to leaving their own slippers here

Wow. Could they not share slippers if they're wearing socks? Not very good for the environment to get through a pair of slippers per person per visit - unless you don't have many visitors!

That's awfully wasteful! Bloody hell!

You have to give advance warning. Like lots of 50+ women I have tricky feet. Arthritis and healed fractures mean it's actually properly painful to walk without shoes or structured slippers. I would need to bring extra footwear with me when visiting you to avoid pain.

If I buy them in bulk, 20 at a time , the cost about $1.50. If i ask for shoes off I need to be considerate of my guests. Most just go about in socks.

Wasteful of the planet, not just your money.

I will tell someone I invite over for the first time that shoes are not allowed. As I mentioned previously a few frequent visitors have left their own slippers here. You are certainly considerate in that you have no objection to switching from street shoes to structed slippers

Yes, this. I wasn't concerned about your bank accout @BPinCT 🤣

most don't ask for slippers. 20 pairs usually last a year or so