Pregnant women contribute same £ to hen do

[wantnoscrubs]

Advice appreciated!
I'm planning a hen do in February and I have two pregnant women joining. I'm working out the budget and a substantial amount of the supermarket order is going to be booze 🍸
I've been thinking I should try and work out a way for the pregnant ladies not to pay as much as they won't be drinking.
What do you think? Would you expect to pay less or the same as everyone else if you were pregnant

I think it would be nice to offer that if you could, but I wouldn't particularly expect it.

Yes they should pay less.

Split the food & non alcoholic drinks 10 ways.

Split the alcohol 7 ways.

Or whatever numbers work.

Also this should apply to all non drinkers, not just pregnant people.

Yes but everyone non pregnant is a booze hound 😂

Just deduct the alcohol cost from the food cost and split that between the drinkers and add on the food cost for each person. I wouldn't be charging pregnant women the cost of alcohol. Does everyone else drink though?

Just split the booze between the people that will be drinking, I don’t think it will complicated at all?

Can the alcohol be calculated as a separate transaction which they don’t contribute towards?

Alcohol split between whoever is drinking and everyone else pays a separate amount. Get some fancy non alcoholic drinks rather than just the usual coke / lemonade / juice etc and split that between the non drinkers.

Yes this is my plan! I'm wondering if this is typical though?
I don't know why I'm just paranoid that the other hens might be put out if they find out they are paying more compared to someone else? Even though I think that's fair?

Considering the booze bill is likely to be enormous, yes, you should split that bit between the drinkers only.

And what about kitty for the night out? Shall we just have one for the drinkers and the pregnant ladies have one between them?

Just be aware that mocktails are pretty expensive too. I’m always mindful of not overcharging non-drinkers, but sometimes they need a heads up not to take the piss themselves!

Also presume you have a WhatsApp group about it, so you need to pre-warn people about your idea too so no surprises!

It's hard to figure out what's fair in this scenario as obviously some people will eat more, some will drink more etc. Could you do a food and soft drink shop and everyone brings their own alcohol. I don't drink a lot so think I would prefer just to pay for what I drink.

I’d do separate kitties. Maybe ask the pregnant women themselves how they want to play that one?
it’s really lovely you’re considering others 😊

Totally. You can't have the pregnant ones chipping in for an umpteenth round of shots!

I think there should be two kitties. One for the drinkers and one for the non-drinkers. Nobody drinks mocktails at the same rate as they drink cocktails anyway.

Would you be bothered if you found the alcohol bill had been split differently because two of the women were pregnant and wouldn't be drinking because i wouldn't.

Besides, you'll be buying less alcohol to reflect this.

I'd just make it clear in the message (assuming your friends have already announced their pregnancies):

"X & Y are pregnant and won't be drinking, so I've split the alcohol cost only between the people who will be drinking."

And yes, probably two kitties (or maybe X&Y just get their own).

Hard to see how people could get upset about others not subsidising their drinking unless they're CFs.

We used to go away for the week of Hogmanay with friends and there were several years that someone or several someone's were pregnant.

We did separate splits for alcohol and food as one of our friends never drinks and the people who were pregnant shouldn't pay for the rest - annoying enough to be surrounded by tipsy people without paying for it lol

I think that's entirely fair and no one should have any issue with it. And yes - separate kitty for going out for sure, same reason.

I don't drink for medical reasons even while not pregnant and no I don't want to be contributing to booze I'm not drinking. The others being booze hounds makes this more important as the booze bill will be higher and so everyone's share would be higher. It's really easy to do though - you just lump soft drinks in with the food and keep the booze bill separate, then you do three calculations

a) food + soft drinks divided by the number of attendees
b) booze divided by the number of drinkers

The drinkers total is a+b
The non drinkers total is a

Easy! And if you tried to charge me for booze I would tell you I needed to pay less on the day or when I received my bill!

I don’t like kittys, I would get my own drinks. In fact I would probably rather bring/buy my own booze rather than sharing as I think it is easier for each person to work out how much they need.

There doesn’t need to be a kitty if people pay for their own drinks.

I think you need to be absolutely open about this with everyone. I don't drink these days (stopped because of mounjaro, not alcoholism or pregnancy!) so would want to join the pregnant women group. I would use that as a way to message the group, there might be others who would opt not to drink for various reasons.

Absolutely the right thing to do. Just split the cost of the supermarket alcohol between the non pregnant attendees - easy