5.5 year old gets up on own

[Jellyrose20]

I have a 5.5 year old. She often wakes up before us and our 6 month baby and comes downstairs on her own.
She has access to a healthy snack box and juice boxes. We've also prepped a kitchen area so she can make her own cereal/ cold drink if she wants.
Would you do this?
YABU - No I wouldn't
YANBU - yes I would

Completely normal. I wouldn't have a snack box either, mine could access the normal cupboards by 5.

No issue, if this is a sensible child. My kids were simial ages.
BUT, they're not allowed to eat anything, ever, if there's not an adult around.

Children like adults are individuals.

One of my nephews could not be left alone like that until he was 11 there as my DD could at 5.

She has no interest in chemicals etc there as he nearly always wanted to experiment. This even though both are/were encouraged to help with DIY.

I've always let mine get up on their own / together - from about 4/5 - but I still don't let them eat snacks. Too worried about choking. I've no doubt I'm being ridiculous but I just feel better if they wait for breakfast which is usually pretty bloody early anyway!

There is absolutely no way DS1 would do this. He struggles being on his own for 5 minutes. I am amazed any child that age is happy to be on their own for 1.5 hours tbh. If she’s happy and your confident in her abilities though I don’t think it’s a problem.

It’s fine, make sure you are half awake / your door is open and make sure dd knows what is and isn’t allowed in the kitchen (not allowed to use the big knives or microwave.

My dc did something from a similar age - would get up and dress, come downstairs to play. Usually just 30mins or so before we got up and not every day. Ds liked to make himself a cheeky milkshake! I had to buy smaller bottles of milk as the massive ones were too heavy for him to pour without making a terrible mess.

Independence is really a good thing and they love pottering around on their own.

My mother said one of her best mornings was when I figured out how to do cereal and a cup of water for me and my younger brother. I must have been around 4-5. She would have heard us yapping away but was able to stay horizontal. We were early risers.

My DS pulled the kettle off the side and over him (thankfully not boiling but still hot). I was up and able to deal with it quickly so he was fine but imagine something similar happening and parents being asleep. Even if you are awake it will still take you time to get to your child.
I don't know why parents risk it. And people of any age can choke. Might be rare doesn't mean it can't happen.

I'm flabbergasted by some of the comments on here. Make her stay in her room - sure lock her into a small space for an hour and a half. That's better than giving her freedom and independence in her own home. I guess bedrooms have anti-choking magic, so that would be better.
If you live in a standard sized house and would likely hear a crash or bang and be there as soon as you would if you had just popped to the loo then, as long as she can clearly manage, then do whatever works for you. I was allowed to make toast by climbing on the sideboard when I was 5. Obvs a different time and I wouldn't allow my 5 year old to do the same. But we are active in encouraging our children to do as much as is reasonably possible by themselves as well as supervised chores at 3 and 5. As a result they are very capable and resilient. That's a good thing. Don't let your kids become my uni housemates that would burn everything and didn't know how to use a washing machine

Choking? Is it normal for a 5 year old to regularly choke

I used to leave a ready poured cup of milk in the fridge and a banana out for early morning s. Bit of telly and we got a lie in, result!

What is your worry about a child occupying themselves? It’s really healthy and normal for a school age child to be capable of surviving without interaction for a short period of time.
Can I ask how many children you have and their ages? It may be that you’re at the ‘PFB’ stage which is why we have differing views.

Really ?? How many of us positively interact with our children at 6.00am in the morning ??? I’d say if a 5 yo can play by themselves for 90 minutes, then it is fantastic. I’m sure if the OP’s DD is feeling lonely, she knows she can go back upstairs. It would be different if she was on an IPad or looking at TV. Though when my children were at that age, it was a Saturday morning treat to look at TV for an hour. One of us would go down with them, switch on the TV, etc and go back upstairs for an hour or so. And my children, now young adults, have no issues with social skills, vocabulary, friends, relationships, independence, they have always felt loved by us and we all talk about anything and everything and gave a great relationship, etc.

To the OP, the only thing different I’d do is try encourage your DD to stay in bed/her room until at least 7am, for me getting up before then is too early. Have a clock or something in her room so she knows the time.

I do but not for an hour and half in the morning. Remember the OP is asking what others would do not for others to judge her. I was just answering her questions about what I do.

When my children were small, boiling/hot water was never left in kettles. The wires were safely out of reach and plugged out when not in use. I don’t think any/many parents are in the presence of their five year old at home all the time.

Minimise risk as much as possible, explain potential hazards to children from a young age and not to climb on worktops, tables, dangers of hot water, etc, etc. The OP’s child is 5, not a 2 or 3 year old.

Mine did similar at this age.

They're now independent and capable adults.

The evidence shows that, as long as basic safety precautions are taken and parameters are managed, children thrive in situations where they are able to take and manage smalls risks. They learn their own capabilities and develop confidence and self esteem when they can do things for themselves.

No. I would worry about choking. Also I wouldn't want my child watching TV/using electronics for more than 15 minutes a day at that age which is what I would suspect would happen if they were left to their own devices. Plus I'd just get up and spend time with them, it's not too early. Alternatively I would get them in my bed with me with a book if I didn't want to get out of bed yet.

Stay in her room with snacks, toys and books - would you not be worried that she’ll swing out of the curtains and injure herself, jump off her bed and bang her head against a hard object, climb on to her chest of drawers and fall off, mess with the light bulb in her lamp that is switched on. Swallow a small piece of a toy, etc, etc, etc.

I would imagine that the OP had made her downstairs as safe as possible - child locks on high level presses that house anything with chemicals in it, matches, sharp knives, etc. Unplugged appliances. Cooker switched off. Exit doors securely locked. Has smoke alarms in every room. Probably has told her DD to leave the door of whatever room she’s in open and left her own bedroom door open.

My concern would be that she hasn't brushed her teeth before eating and potential choking risk foods.

I get mine up (brush their teeth, get them breakfast, prepare a bowl of snacks they can grab later) and then go back to bed for a bit, they play (mostly) happily together until I get up and know they can come get me if something happens, even if they just need to complain about each other/get me to open a box etc... I was woken 3 times this morning... . I try to only give them low risk foods however (e.g. no popcorn/grapes etc, they can have those when I am awake just in case), mine are 7 and 4 and we have been doing this for quite a while (I also try to make sure there are no strangulation or suffocation risks accessible e.g. plastic bags) and obviously have the added advantage that if something happened to one the other would most likely come and get me.

Mine always got up first but didn’t get food. It was tv only. My youngest has a tablet so watches that in bed instead of coming downstairs.

Congratulations! The day we taught our kids to make cereal and put a film on, was the day our weekends changed for the better!

Sounds like a great, independent kid. As long as she is in no danger and doesn’t wake anyone else up, let her crack on!

DS has done this from a really young age, under 5. Short of locking him in his room I don’t know how I would have stopped him as he would creep down really early. Choking was (still is and he’s now 11) my main concern but I had to accept that risk and he would just make himself cereal - he knew not to eat grapes etc.
I also put the sharp knives and toaster out of reach after I caught him toasting a bagel.

Some of you really need to look into the huge benefit of the Forest Schools which allow 2 and 3 year olds to chop firewood with axes!

Research the benefits to young children of learning how to identify take and manage risks.

I was taught to use matches safely while in primary school. DM's friend's DC weren't. So while she was out, they took the opportunity to experiment. But because they knew they weren't allowed, they took them under the bed in their DM's bedroom. They caused a major fire.