It's a bloody dog!

[MammaKel]

Ugh, I didn't realise how batshit crazy people were about their "furbabies."

We went to a family gathering yesterday where SIL and BIL and their DDog were - they don't have kids, and DDog is their baby but omg.

I could get past the calling each other mummy and daddy, calling my in laws grandma and grandpa and telling my kids he was their fur cousin and showing us pictures of taking him to see " Santa Paws" but there were two instances that genuinely made me cringe a bit ..

We were exchanging gifts, and they asked me where DDogs were, I laughed because I thought they were joking, but nope, totally serious and was upset he'd be left out, so I apologised (for some reason) and moved on very quickly..

The next one was that the dog was getting a bit agitated, and they said he was tired and getting a bit cranky, so they were leaving so he could have a nap..

I'm mostly being light-hearted, and I'm an animal lover (have 4 cats), but I just didn't realise how far it went AIBU or is this just the norm now?

@DearDarcy it’s less about what people choose to do with their own pets in their own homes and more about the impact this has on other people. BIL and his partner inflicted their puppy on us Xmas day - DH and I are both allergic, they disregarded the precious boundaries we had agreed that the puppy would be in a crate or pen unless on a walk and would not be present and the dinner table and altogether it took the entirety of the focus of attention for Christmas Day and totally killed the vibe - couldn’t get through a conversation without someone pathetically telling the stupid creature to “get down” etc etc.

The dog is not a person - it doesn’t need to come to Christmas and doesn’t need to be consisted “part of the family”…because it is a pet!

Well maybe it’s ’a bloody dog to you’ but it’s their baby.

Yes normal. I work with companion animals & they really are part of the family now. It's a multi billion industry as well.

Okay first point yes that is a bit crazy I aways buy my dogs gifts and the dog sitter from her but I wouldn’t buy a friends dog.

However some people were never blessed with children myself included so your dog does become a big focus in your life.

People should just let people be and do what makes them happy.

Also an over tired dog especially young can be an absolute nightmare so totally get them taking it away to sleep.

How is someone’s child that I don’t know, adding anything to my life? Love your armchair diagnosis though 🤣

I once had a labourer turn up to my house with a dog during building work. He asked if the dog could run around the garden while they worked, clearly assuming I’d say yes. I said no - we had an elderly cat with a heart condition. He was shocked, said the dog was like a child to him and couldn’t leave his side. Still no, mate. My cat’s health comes first.

He then totally flounced and went home in a huff after the lead builder failed to ‘back him up’. Bizarre behaviour, both the entitlement that I’d be ok with it, and the assumption that his boss would overrule me, the home owner and client! Nuts.

Even as a dog lover, this is ridiculous behaviour.

my dog was put in her crate over the Xmas dinner, she had a long walk in the morning and was tired out and slept through it all.

I would still save my dog from the burning building though.

@dontknowwhathappens thank you for saying that! They were trying to make out that we were being unreasonable dog haters (I mean to be fair we are dog haters but the boundaries we had agreed were so that we could compromise and have a nice time).

The irony is now it has made us far less willing to be accommodating. We were satisfied with taking antihistamines and suffering at bit when the dog would be kept away but it was allowed to roam the house and climb all over us and made us feel dreadful right into Boxing Day so we shall now be saying it’s us or the dog at family gatherings.

Yes I've come across similar types. Call their dog their children's brother or sister. I was completely confused by a friend who had 1 child talking about her daughter,'s sister Lilly she meant their dog who she refers to as her youngest! Full kisses on lips and all.

You were not being unreasonable at all! If I was going to someone’s home that were not keen on dogs - I would tire the dog out and let her sleep
in crate later.

We had people over last night and the doggie was being too much and trying to take the cheese and biscuits. It’s not pleasant for the guests, nor fair to the dog (when the food is at coffee table height). Off to crate she went - back out when finished eating. It’s just manners!

It’s a dog. Perhaps a beloved pet but a pet. Not a baby. Not equivalent to a baby. And let’s face it, in the kind of emergency situation that saw people starving people would eat their pets.

Aaarghhh! Saw a fella in the pub the other night pretty much tonguing his dog, licking him all over the chops, much hilarity ensued. I just hope he had that dog wormed & up to date with its vaccs

Some might, I doubt all would. I'm vegan, and wouldn't eat any animal if I was starving, let alone kill one to eat in the first place. If I was starving, and I'm sure it must be a disastrous situation where things aren't going to get better in your scenario, I'd rather just end it.

@dontknowwhathappens
It's not a question over whether a strangers child "adds anything to your life" or not.
It's simply that anyone who is not utterly deranged and selfish would recognise that a child's life is vastly more important than a dogs 🤷‍♀️

Well that’s not normal behaviour , even for a dog lover, such as myself. My dog is family. I don’t take family to work.

Me too - ‘furbaby’ is a really creepy concept. My dog is a dog, not some sort of child substitute! That said, I did get him a dog Christmas jumper 🤣

Yip. Selfish me.

I'm going to substitute cat for dog but I agree with you. A stranger adds nothing to my life whereas my cat (when he was alive) absolutely did.

To be fair there are certain people that aren't strangers that I would have pushed out of the way to save my cat!

The thing is though, in a time where there's a huge amount of danger, you don't think in terms of "whose life has more value". You think "oh f* the house is on fire and someone I LOVE is in there". Most people would go for the person or animal they have an actual emotional connection to. It's the people who would risk those that they love to consider if they are worth enough that are probably psychopaths.

Madness. I sort of get it as having a dog as a companion is ace, but as with most dogs around here (farmers), the dogs live in the barns or an insulated shed. They are animals. They live outside. They don’t get presents. That’s not to say that I don’t talk to mine in a baby voice when I see them.. but they also know boss voice.

Your allergic and compromised and they did this 😱😱😡🤬

I have dogs and even I see this as rude and inconsiderate big time

I do not take my dogs to others houses unless I ask but usually not.
if hosting my dogs are crated as they can get a bit excitable (even with the training) and if the smaller grandkids are there they might accidentally get knocked over so safer all round in their crates they go.

My kids are grown and my grandkids live abroad…..I made my dog a roast duck for Christmas. 🐾

I think it does matter. It matters to the OP if they’re making her feel bad for not getting the dog presents, for example.

A labradoodle is a big dog. She should not be allowing it to jump. I mean no breed big or small should be jumping up at people but as a large breed owner she has a huge responsibility. One of mine is a labradoodle, she is dappy as they come but also really easy to train. Honestly, it was a doddle, so this owner is just lazy. My doodle as with all my dogs, wouldn’t come near you until instructed too. The laziness of dog owners doesn’t cease to amaze me.
Train your dog or at least put it on a lead!

I hope you are ok after that incident.

Ahh this question always comes up eventually as some sort of trump card in the 'children/humans are more important than animals'.
It is also generally posed by people who have never actually been in any sort of emergency situation.

In an actual emergency you don't stand around thinking, you just act (well if you want to save people/animals/not die, you do. I guess some of you might pontificate til the house burns).

Logically, I am yeeting from the burning building the first beings I come across, that I can. If that is my dog, so be it. If it is your child, so be it.

I am not running past someone I can save in order to find others I may not save.

I know that was my mindset as it has happened (wasn't a burning building though I'd just have died).

If I am standing on the side of the river and two are drowning and one is my dog and one is your child, I'd go for my dog first - because my dog is unlikely to drown ME in the process of saving him, then I can come back for your child.

I make that decision not purely because I like my dog more than I like your child, but because I know (again, experience) that grabbing a drowning human is likely to result in both our deaths, grabbing a drowning small dog is not.

Or I might decide both are fucked and me adding to the death toll helps no one!

When it comes to emergency situations, 'value' is generally not what we're thinking about. Its 'can I save' and 'Will I survive' and 'oh fuck'.

The really brutal reality is that if there is a situation that involves my dog and someone elses child, I've probably not even noticed your child because my dog is my priority, and your child isn't.

We can go all around the houses with various ideas but until and unless you are in that situation, you do not know what you would actually do and a good proportion of people will flap about pointless and save no one and probably kill themselves in the process. After all, we are just frightened animals, prone to panic and irrational behaviour... just like all the other animals, in the end.