Gin night ruined by my son?

[Becc91]

So my DS came back from Bristol Uni (with a mullet no less 😣) and told me off in front of my girl friends - all for singing Do They Know It's Christmas?
Apparently one term of a politics degree makes him qualified to tell me what I can and can't sing in my own home after a few gins. Feeling quite hurt and embarrassed as this all happened in front of my friends.

I don't see what I've done wrong but I don't want to be ignorant, is it just me??
Opinions wanted , thanks xx and merry christmas

Yes to this.

We were collectively only a couple of steps beyond collecting pennies for African babies and being told to clean our plates because children in Africa would give their right arms for the spinach/ broccoli/ liver/ kidneys we were turning our noses up at.

Awareness is an evolving process. Congratulations to those here who knew everything back in 1984. Hindsight is a wonderful thing all the same though...

i like this.

I remember George Harrison trying to get funds for Bangladesh in the early 70s. Back then raising money from joe public to try to help suffering souls elsewhere, while our governments stuck their thumbs up their bums and kept their minds in neutral was A Thing back then.

We have learned a lot since then.

As for the lyrics: for sure they aren't fantastic. They got a tune and a song together in short order. That is it. White saviour and racism aside: it allowed millions of people to lobby their governments to improve aid to impoverished regions of the world, and to develop and improve our overseas aid.

Leave her alone, she can sing if she wants and if the embarrassment level is to be set by randoms on the internet or young lads after their first term at uni then OP wouldn't even be able to tie her shoes.

He does rather bring Rik from The young Ones to mind!

Yes I probably wouldn't choose it on a jukebox, but the posters acting outraged are somewhat ridiculous.

I hardly think the OP and her mates all had a poll a week in advance on what to sing, and printed out lyric sheets! More likely it was playing on the radio or whatever Christmas Mix music playlist was chosen.

It's not aged well but unfortunately it's practically designed as a sing along song 🫣

There are two separate issues here. Should he have humiliated you in front of friends? No, that is uncalled for.

IS DTKIC a problematic song? I would say yes, but even then I think enjoying it for its medley in private is fine as long as you're aware of how awful the lyrics are. It's a shame they don't get some new ones and re-release it for a more modern impactful organisation like Give Directly.

YESS! This! I thought this too! Alcoholic parent being berated by their child. Where’s The Patsy in all this I wonder…

It portrays a whole continent as one thing - won’t know about Christmas, no snow,
at that time there was as now a huge range of wealth in the continent some of whom would definitely be rich and able to get goods (the greatest gift they’ll get this year is life)

I don’t see it as as problematic at the time - it was written very quickly to raise money. No it didn’t look into the background and the war, but it didn’t appear that politicians worldwide were doing much to at least try to cp help with the famine

However I feel that soon after the organisers should have been coming out and discussing problems with the song and the approach which for example took livelihood and agency from the people there.

Really? I'd love to see the maths that supports that argument.

A mullet? No wonder you need gin OP!

There's a great parody song - feed the UK - about CoL.
Sing that instead as it's a great tune but without the problematic lyrics.

Or just let him know you're singing the original 1984 version & he needs to situate that in its historical context. People in 1984 horrified at the starvation & deaths due to the Ethiopia famine & wanting to help. It wasn't just band aid it was blue peter, every school & church in the UK. If he doesn't understand what historical context means then feel free to eye roll & make him look like he knows nothing about politics.

Agree that there is absolutely no need for a 2024 re-release (or any of the other re-releases)

It is a very complex issue. And since when did vituperation advance an argument?

(Two can play the game of making bald statements and cutting remarks.)

I mean if this is true and I mean we all trust the bbc 5% a mere 5% of all raised went to help them.

Probably off topic but isn’t the point about not knowing it’s Christmas making the point that there’s a lot made in European tradition of Christmas being the season of goodwill to all men, meanwhile the people of East Africa were dying of starvation? I always took it as a rebuke. Also “Africa” is much easier to fit into a song than “Ethiopia, Sudan and Mozambique”

Numerous issues on the several iterations of it.
Displaying ignorance regarding African countries. Saying do they know it’s Christmas about Ethiopia when they are majority Christian so they would know just as well as the U.K. Saying nothing ever grows no rains no rivers, no snow when Africa has all of these!

Later versions adding in Ebola - referring to it as in West Africa when it wasn’t even in West African countries at the time.

African/Black artists submitting edits to the lyrics year after year and them being rejected. Raising issues with the song’s problematic white saviour themes and being ignored.

This has been discussed every year since 2014. The song was never good and it’s long overdue to go on the racist scrap heap of history along with the original meeny miny mo nursery rhyme.

Google will give you plenty to read.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/newsbeat-30182195

https://deadline.com/2023/12/band-aid-anthem-slammed-lyrics-racist-patronising-africa-stereotpes-1235681693/

Why should anything be an ‘excuse’ ? If OP didn’t know, then she didn’t know. On the other hand there’s no excuse for her son being rude to her in front of her friends. He could have waited and explained to her later.

People wanted to help, there’s no nasty undertone.
There is still famine in Africa in 2024, the news coming out of Sudan at the moment is horrific, and the poor children dying because they don’t have enough to eat. It’s still an issue and needs exposure. It’s ludicrous we’re here on Boxing Day with too much to eat, and logistically/morally we can’t figure out how to get food to people who are dying? From lack of food.

So band aid didn’t get it right, but it still needs to be in our conscience. Keep singing.

If she’s being racist she deserves to be called out friend and gin or not.

Imagine thinking that you are fighting the good fight by finger wagging at your mother after you return home after one term at uni - bemulleted!

It's the very laziest way to shine your halo.

Should have sung achy breaky heart, in honour of his mullet…

Agreed.

I think it's widely acknowledged now that the lyrics are "problematic", but I assume the whole thing was knocked up in something of a hurry in order to respond quickly to the emergency.

It seems unfair to question the motives of the people involved. There was genuine horror 40 years ago at the reports of the famine and people just wanted to do something. It might be criticised now as "white saviour syndrome", but was it so bad to respond with compassion and concern to a horrible situation?

Oh get over yourself. Your halos about to choke you.

If it makes you feel any better he’s going to be really really embarrassed in ten years.

Jesus Christ. I'm clearly old now that Band Aid is being cancelled. I wonder what's next.

Yes, the DS was right to call out all the racist drunk women in one go. Being a silent bystander to racism is being complicit.

And if folks actually did the research, Bonos lyrics ' thank God it's them instead of you' was one he grappled with at the time due to his religious beliefs. But 'there by the grace of God go I' lis what it's meant to mean.