To think that Xmas food shopping isn't a sodding family day out?

[loveawineloveacrisp]

Just been to M&S for final food shop and the bloody place was over run with entire families shopping together. Just why? If the kids are old enough to be left then they shouldn't be traipsing around and getting in the way when the place is crowded as it is at this time of year.

And as for people who can't drive the right way round a one way car park: kindly fuck off and don't drive if you can't follow road signs.

That's all. Now can someone please pass the 🍷

Why do you need help with your shopping?

If you do fair enough

When I went shopping yesterday it reminded me of the early days of Covid, just before the first lockdown, when supermarkets were full of gormless husbands who looked as if they'd never been in a supermarket before in their lives, just standing around aimlessly, getting in the way of everyone whilst their wives did the actual shopping

Not really your business is it. Just trust me when I say I need help with the shopping.

And that is exactly what is wrong with the modern world.

Yes, it is your responsibility to avoid stress and inconvenience to others. None of us can avoid it altogether, just by existing we are inconveniencing someone (eg the person who would like a house in our road, or wanted the car parking space we just got) but you don't deliberately set out to get in each others' way or annoy them.

Don't take your kids unless you have to.

If you are retired, don't go on Saturdays or lunchtimes.

Put your trolley away properly.

Don't faff at the self-scanners (or the staffed tills, come to that)

Don't block the aisles

If you are retired, don't go on Saturdays or lunchtimes. what the hell

@dynamiccactus
I’m retired and will shop on a Saturday if I wish, thanks.
And at lunchtime. And today.. which was very pleasant in our local M&S Foodhall. Lots of stock and minimal queue for the till. Lots of families..

Because it was obvious the kids were tired and had just been yanked out their beds?

I only pointed out that I am not in Scotland and I am not aux fait with Scottish law on shop opening hours.

Yes. An entire family with both Mum & Dad were shopping near me. One of the DCs was dancing around and trampled on my feet. Annoying in a packed shop.

And some children/teenwith SEN cannot be left alone at home while the parents scoots off to Tesco. So I drag them along shopping. Not everyone has support.

100% this. So weird.

I’m in Canada. I bring my DCs (7, 5, 3) to the grocery store quite frequently, and will do so tomorrow. For me, this is a big part of 1) them learning how to exist in society and 2) encouraging healthy eating

On 1) - I make the expectations VERY clear before we go in. Me: “are we buying sweets?” Them: “no!” Me: “are we buying toys?” Them: “no!” Me (playfully): “if you nasty rotten children even so much as ask me for sweets or toys, what will happen?” Them: “you’ll tickle us!!!” I think I’ve needed to follow through on the threat twice in 5 years. Once, the tickling worked. Once, the whining persisted so I put everything in our cart back and we left the shop. Every other time, the kids have been completely and utterly fine. No whining. No bargaining. No straying away from the trolley.

2. Any fruit or vegetable or herb they want to buy, on the other hand: the answer is “yes”. Giant sweet potatoes, jackfruit, persimmons, kiwis, long beans… the kids try to find interesting looking items, and then we have fun preparing them at home. This is how I now have a 7-year-old who complains when a salad is missing radishes, a 5-year-old who loves chomping down on a massive wedge of raw cabbage, and a 3-year-old who loves garnishing meals with parsley and chives. They feel like they are allowed to be Masters of the Family Meal sometimes, and it is exciting for them (and healthy and tasty for all of us!)

I find that strangers in the shops are typically lovely towards my kids. I’ve had people stop by to explain to them how to choose a good melon, others who ask them what will be eating at home vs what will go in school lunches, and a couple of times older women have stopped to give each kid a $2 coin so they could band together and buy a tub of ice cream.

Going to the shops to me feels like a community activity where all of society is teaching kids how to behave but also how to delight in life.

(in case it was not clear, this is a topic I care deeply about 😂 )

I love seeing families shopping together, especially at Christmas. I really don't mind if it takes me a few minutes longer to accommodate the odd family. The children I saw today were all involved with choosing things, and shopping lists, and clearly very excited. I think it's lovely.

He seemed to be on his own with them so assume he didn't have an alternative but there was a Dad in the supermarket today with one child pushing the trolley, another sat in the trolley, and a 3rd sat on his shoulders. Good luck to that Man. Rather him than me.

Why is that your business?

@UpToMyElbowsInDiapers to me that's fine, 99% of the time of course they should go shopping

But the couple of days before Christmas when the shops and roads are rammed and it's unpleasant enough as it is surely you would try and minimise how many people you take with you just so they don't get in the way?

Ah, in the UK maybe, fair, but in Toronto where I live it is very multicultural and there isn’t the same level of Christmas insanity. I don’t expect shops to be much busier tomorrow than on a typical weekend, necessarily. A bit busier, but not total madness. Even so, one kid is in the cart, one kid pushes the cart, and the other kid holds my hand or holds the cart. We really don’t take up acres and acres of space and I suspect even a UK Asda could cope with the extra 1 square metre of humanity that they represent. 😆

I actually give this more of a pass right before Christmas. Maybe you needed an extra pair of hands to carry all the stuff, maybe dh and dc wanted to come and choose some bits themselves. It's always going to be hectic to shop around Christmas it's a fact of life.

I have way less sympathy when it's march and theres entire families clogging up the supermarket. I especially hate it when the woman is clearly at the end of her tether and rather than helping at all with the shopping or the kids the DH is walking just behind aimlessly like some kind of lost soul. I always wonder, why they didn't just leave gormless DH at home with hyperactive children?

Has OP ever considered using click & collect?

That way if she absolutely must go to the shop then she could avoid the vast majority of what she complains about.

M&S don't do click & collect.

Last time I used click and collect at Christmas, another customer took all my fridge stuff
They said I could go in and get it but I'm immunocompromised hence the click and collect...
ended up in the carpark for an hour while they sorted it and said never again!

I went today, because I had to collect the turkey from M&S that I ordered - deposit non-refundable!

The shop was very quiet, not a single child, no family groups, no civilians. The queue for collecting orders was short & well-organised & everything went smoothly.

However the experience was made hellish by having to sit in stop-start traffic to the slightly out-of-town store & then finding no parking places in their minute car park. DH stopped with the car & I dashed in, got the order & left without any of my planned shop. Waitrose on the way home was equally stacked up with cars, so we gave that a miss too. Luckily we have all the basics & a few treats, but we're raiding the freezer for tomorrow's dinner.

Oh, & I saw a family group to end all family groups on the way home. It stretched an entire block of pavement: adults, children & dogs in groups of 3s & 4s, all calling & chatting to each other. I so hope they were on their way to Waitys. They would've been as annoying as !!!! in there.🏆