Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

Was this an announcement?

77 replies

TidyPearlViewer · 22/12/2024 10:29

At my wedding, the best man announced him and his gf were having a baby. She was 5 months pregnant and everyone knew she was already pregnant. Was it an announcement if everyone already knew? His excuse was he was using it to tee up a story and end the narrative.

OP posts:

VaddaABeetch · 22/12/2024 10:30

What an odd thing to do. He sounds a knob.

Spaceid · 22/12/2024 10:30

No, sounds part of his story as you’ve said. Also, would anyone really be bothered if it was?

Jostuki · 22/12/2024 10:30

Well he announced it didn't he?!

Bad form though and completely unnecessary.

Jingleberryalltheway · 22/12/2024 10:31

Well, was it part of the story?

Spaceid · 22/12/2024 10:32

But the OP said it was part of the story as in it would be as much of an announcement as him saying ‘I’ve know the groom since we were 5’ as part of a story.

Original poster

TidyPearlViewer · 22/12/2024 10:38

He said as some of you know, we are having a baby. When the news was discovered the bride, who was sworn to secrecy, (me) told the groom…essentially a few months before they’d told everyone at someone else’s wedding. Very odd. According to him and his gf (who nobody knew) it was meant to be a way to say how wonderful we were.

My husbands defence, was that everyone knew she was pregnant anyway so it didn’t matter. Before our wedding I said to him can he brief his best man and my husband let him bring the gf. I’d only met her once.

OP posts:

Jennyathemall · 22/12/2024 10:39

Well as you said everyone already knew and it was part of the set up for a story so yes YABU. Might be a bit different if they did a gender reveal in the middle of the buffet. Are you suggesting other good news should be on a banned list of topics so as not to steal your limelight?

harriethoyle · 22/12/2024 10:41

Presumably at 5 months pregnant it was totally apparent to everyone so no thunder stolen. I couldn’t have an issue with this.

LittleBearPad · 22/12/2024 10:42

I dint understand what the point of this is? Are you cross? Confused?

TimeForTeaAndG · 22/12/2024 10:43

So his story about how wonderful you both are started with how you'd blabbed about the pregnancy to your then fiancé after being sworn to secrecy?

Why did the best man need briefed? And surely as his gf is pregnant then it's just good form to invite her as his partner.

Original poster

TidyPearlViewer · 22/12/2024 10:43

I suppose I’d always thought that you aren’t meant to do that in a best man’s speech, at someone’s wedding but I just wonder if my husband is right that it’s not an announcement if everyone knew anyway. Yes, I thought other people’s news isn’t meant to be announced at other people’s weddings?

OP posts:

FloralGums · 22/12/2024 10:45

I wouldn’t have any problem with this. Is it not okay to talk about pregnancy as part of a speech? Maybe a very conservative community?

TheGriffle · 22/12/2024 10:45

How did you know she was pregnant before anyone else if you’d only met her once and her partner is your dh’s friend?

AngelsWithSilverWings · 22/12/2024 10:46

I'm really struggling to see an issue here. Weddings are weird to me these days. So many rules about making sure no one takes a mini second of light from the bride that would never have been a thing when I got married almost 30 years ago.

Original poster

TidyPearlViewer · 22/12/2024 10:46

Yes so she came along. And it was just meant to be an ending to the speech about this fun weekend we’d had and the news had got out to my fiancé. They were 25 at the time. I just wonder if you’re meant to tell embarrassing stories at weddings or not.

But it’s helpful and really useful to know you guys think it’s not an issue, especially as everyone knew and it was in context pf a story about us as a couple

OP posts:

Dontlletmedownbruce · 22/12/2024 10:48

If it was part of an anecdote then why wouldn't he? Unless his whole speech was about himself and his partner then I don't think its a big deal. Why is this bothering you? Getting engaged at a wedding or announcing pregnancy at a family wedding is a big no no but if someone is 5 months pregnant then it's simply mentioning something in passing.

Original poster

TidyPearlViewer · 22/12/2024 10:49

I’d only met her once before and she’d told me then as she was being sick in the loo.

OP posts:

AngelsWithSilverWings · 22/12/2024 10:49

What's embarrassing about a 25 year old being pregnant or the news of a pregnancy being discovered Have I misunderstood what you mean?

ManhattanPopcorn · 22/12/2024 10:51

You are really over thinking this.

Original poster

TidyPearlViewer · 22/12/2024 10:51

I just mean was it an announcement - my friends and family didn’t know her but all of my then fiancés side did and they all knew. She had a bump and the news was in the open.

Not embarrassing to be pregnant I mean maybe he was young and didn’t know better, having only been to a couple of weddings

OP posts:

TimeForTeaAndG · 22/12/2024 10:51

I get more confused each time you post. Of course the best man tells embarrassing stories, it's pretty much a rule of speech writing. Best man gently ribs the groom, father of the bride reminisces about his daughter, groom thanks everyone on behalf of himself and his bride....

What have their ages got to do with anything?

TimeForTeaAndG · 22/12/2024 10:53

It wasnt an announcement like ding ding ding everybody, I'd like to announce that gf and I will be welcoming a little bundle of joy etc.

He was ensuring that everyone had the information for the rest of the story.

OnlyWhenILaugh · 22/12/2024 10:54

Are you saying the anecdote was a dig at you for telling your then dp that they were expecting a baby?

Because from the way you've reported it, he wasn't making an announcement as such.

Original poster

TidyPearlViewer · 22/12/2024 10:54

Well he teased both of us. I may well be overthinking and confused about it. I just wanted to check on here. That was the only mention of him and his gf in the speech. The rest was about us.

OP posts:

LittleBearPad · 22/12/2024 10:54

The best man referred to his visibly pregnant girlfriend being pregnant and you think this is problematic because?

His friends and family already knew. Yours didn’t but wouldn’t have cared.

Flip

1 2 3 4