Was this an announcement?

[TidyPearlViewer]

At my wedding, the best man announced him and his gf were having a baby. She was 5 months pregnant and everyone knew she was already pregnant. Was it an announcement if everyone already knew? His excuse was he was using it to tee up a story and end the narrative.

Bloody hell, how long ago was this OP? It was a complete non event to start with, why are you even still reflecting on it?

It's unbelievable, I don't know what the others are on about tbh. Totally inappropriate for him to be going on about his life milestones, maybe if they get married himself he can do a speech about having children but they haven't bothered and it's your wedding. Your husband won't want you to take against his friend that's why. Does the gf feel self conscious about being pregnant but unmarried?

It really just sounds like it was a story about you and your DH, the fact it was related to their pregnancy was coincidental.

If he had stood in the middle of the dance floor just before your first dance, asked for quiet and then announced he and his gf were expecting, then popper w pink/blue glitter / smoke bomb things to announce the sex then that would be an announcement and something to get annoyed about.

I think he sounds odd and it’s normal to make the best-man’s speech about the groom and how lucky he is to have met the bride isn’t it? No need to bring up your own pregnancy, which let’s be honest, isn’t very interesting to anyone except yourselves and your own very immediate family. So even if it were some sort of announcement, most people would have ahhhed but not really given a shit.

If it’s any consolation, my husband’s best man speech was dreadful. It’s was all about him and what a comedian he was. Nothing about my husband and certainly nothing about me. It was a weird comedy act, that came along with a silly song and performative art/dance. Totally bizarre. No one laughed, there were a few polite noises at best. I was cringing and wishing the ground would swallow me up. It was so awkward 😂 And awful 😂 …

but 20 years on no one remembers or cares. So don’t worry about it or overthink it. It won’t have ruined your day and it’s probably already forgotten.

You are being very silly.

It was not an announcement at all, it was just part of the story.

It’s not very often that I feel sorry for the DH’s on here but you sound incredibly hard work.

You married the man you love and all you’re thinking about is someone mentioning that his gf was pregnant.

Poor DH.

I'd have zero issue with what you've outlined.

If everyone knew it wasn’t an announcement. Teeing up a story seems reasonable.

Who really cares anyway as you all knew?

It is not ok to announce a pregnancy at a wedding. It is ok to mention a pregnancy at a wedding.

The best man mentioned the pregnancy as part of a story. That is completely normal and acceptable.

Did he announce it or mention it in passing. Very different scenarios.

He wasn’t going on about his life milestones.

The partner is openly pregnant and he was telling a story about how wonderful OP and her now DH is, and part of that story involved his partner being pregnant.

Why are you trying to 'work it out' though?

If you have to do that, it shows it really doesn't matter 😳

It sounds as though they did the actual announcement for the first time at someone else’s wedding? So I’d just be glad that wasn’t your wedding and everyone already knew. If it was just a segue I’d think it was a strange one but not a big deal. But when you say they were 25 at the wedding, how old are they now?

I'm not understanding how this anecdote illustrates how wonderful the newly wedded couple are/were, but it doesn't sound like an announcement. It's normal for a wedding speech to include some background information about how the speaker knows them, etc, and this feels within the realm of typical. Definitely not worth thinking about or being annoyed over. (And I'm also wondering how long ago the wedding was...)

Of course it’s not an announcement! She’s walking around being pregnant and everybody already knows. Plus it was just a way point in a story.

Massive eye roll for the bride who feels her light was dimmed by this 🙄😂🙄

Sorry - just reread the OP and realised you were the bride. You are being silly and funny stories make for the best best man’s speeches. Ten minutes of unadulterated heartfelt drivel is a bit boring for most people. The speeches are supposed to be entertaining.

Was this recently ? i.e. last weekend or something

or are you overthinking something from the past.

Your wedding / wedding day is over, concentrate on your marriage and your future.

Does it really matter either way? It's unreasonable and not feasible to police the actions of everyone that attends your wedding. Try not to let it bother you. If it was seen as an announcement and for some reason that's a wedding faux pas ( it wouldn't have bothered me in the slightest) then perhaps other people will have thought it I'll judges too. But it's a tiny moment in time of an otherwise big occasion. Really, don't sweat the small stuff.

How long ago was this?

It wouldn't have bothered me in the slightest but I do find threads like this annoying.

It was not an announcement, it was part of an anecdote which is a normal thing in a best man's speech.

Exactly. Bad form if he’d taken the microphone to make the best man’s speech and started with “I know we are here to celebrate the wedding of TidyPealViewer and her new DH, but before I start, I want you all to share the wonderful news that my fiancée and I are expecting a baby in May…..”, then that would - most certainly - have been out of order. But mentioning it as part of a broader story? Perfectly reasonable. Similarly, if your auntie sees him at the reception drinks and is asking how he is, perfectly reasonable to say “Fine thanks - and we are having a baby in the spring”. Sharing your own news, in a casual conversational fashion, does not constitute “making an announcement”.

I wouldn't have an issue but then if anyone was harbouring lovely news like that I would have incorporated it into the toasts myself (a lovely counterbalance to our list of dearly departed's)

Someone announced a baby birth at my wedding. Dhs friend couldn't make it as his GF went into early labour the night before. Baby was born as we sat down to eat. During the speeches a msg came through announcing the birth and a friend ran over to whisper in DHs ear. He stood up again and announced the birth and asked everyone to make a toast to the little baby. It never occurred to me to be negative, I thought it was absolutely lovely. The couple then asked DH to be godfather and now the story is often repeated. We never forget her birthday and they never forget our anniversary.

essentially a few months before they’d told everyone at someone else’s wedding. Very odd

@TidyPearlViewer what happened at the wedding where they told everyone? Were they discreet? Or did they announce it there?

Gently are there some other issues going on right now in your life that make this feel bigger than it is? Did something ho horribly wrong at the wedding that youre now picking it all apart?
Otherwise I agree you sound like hard work. He mentioned something everyone knew about during a speech that made you both sound important to them. Sounds like a nice speech to me. Be grateful to have had a nice positive best man not one who tells dodgy anecdotes or shit jokes.

God please say it wasn't 25 years ago and OP has been ruminating on it ever since 🙈

Looking at Advanced Search which I know some of you hate but I don't care would say it happened a few years ago.

It's not news if everyone already knows it. It sounds like it was a legitimate part of the anecdote he was sharing.