To not let my sister bring her own meat on Christmas day!

[FelizNavidadAmiga]

First off, we are a strictly vegan household for moral reasons. I invited my sister for Christmas lunch as she is recently divorced and has nowhere else to go. I usually put on a magnificent spread with roast vegetables, tagine, stuffed peppers, vine leaves, falafel, home made hummus etc. My sister has just sent me a message saying she's going to bring her own chicken to cook. AIBU to say no way! I don't want chicken cooking in my nice clean vegan oven! Plus the smell makes me feel ill 🤢 I don't want to upset her as she's very sensitive at the moment but surely she can do without chicken for 1 day.

Absolutely no way - my house is also a vegan household, which means NOTHING non-vegan to be consumed. One of my aunties once asked if she could bring her own (dairy) milk for her tea, and I said of course not 🤢 She's the only person who's ever asked!

I agree with the first post, and no one said that "turkey and boiled vegs" are a magnificent spread either 😂

There are options!

You win mean spirited comment of the day.

OP, your sister is being very unreasonable-most people would love to be invited and enjoy your hospitality. I’d never dream of dictating what I want as a guest unless allergies etc so gently suggest to her she makes other arrangements if eating meat at a Christmas meal is more important to her.

Are you strict on clothing choices too?

But it’s integral to the OP. Her sister wanted to bring a raw chicken and cook it in OP’s kitchen, using OP’s utensils. OP is morally opposed to meat - if she’d omitted that she’d likely have been accused of a drip feed and faced a barrage of questions as to why she objected to the cooking of it if she wasn’t actually eating it. I doubt OP describes her veganism as ‘moral’ every time it’s mentioned, but it’s relevant here as the source of her objection.

Sometimes l do wonder why those who do eat meat object to thIs kind of terminology. Everyone knows what has to happen in order for the steak to be on our plates. Maybe criticising others for openly voicing their objection to that reality indicates that not everyone is as comfortable with the process as they like to think.

And anyone with half a brain knows that veganism is a moral choice, and the correct one. Do people have no idea how dairy products are produced?

I speak as an omnivore.

OP's meal sounds way more interesting than a roast.

Another omnivore here and I agree.

I think the OP does want to live and let live - the 🐔 anyway.

Good question - I nearly specified food and drink in my post. No, I don't police people's clothing/footwear, though that would be nice 😂 I'm sure people have visited wearing wool etc - I suppose there has to be a line somewhere? I could make them do a questionnaire at the door to make sure they haven't used toiletries that are tested on animals, and make sure they're not wearing shoes made with animal-derived glue - but as it stands, it's just food and drink.

Alas, OP not letting her relative eat (part of) one chicken in her house won't really make much difference in the grand scheme of things.
A good compromise would be to let her bring already prepared meat, and perhaps her own plate/utensils, so that they can share their time. OP surely must have eaten alongside meat eaters at one point in her life?

Your sister knows your family is strictly vegan but still wants to bring meat to your house. NOT ON.

I would 100% refuse her bringing chicken meat. This is your home and there are serious ethical issues why you are vegan. I'd offer main dish alternatives if she's open to the discussion.

It's up to her if she wants to join you. All you can do is making clear you are a vegan household and food choices can be discussed except bringing any type of meat except vegetable based.

I just feel that if a household is completely 'morally'/'ethically' vegan then it should not just be in relation to food. If you can compromise regarding clothing then why not on already prepped food? An obvious example is someone wearing leather (shoes, belt, wallet, bag, purse....who knows what else?).

Does laughing at other posters serious comments make you feel better ? You do you - fabulous that you can cook meat for your family. But some people have strong moral reasons for not eating meat. There’s nothing in OP’s posts to say that she thinks she’s better than anyone else, just a mention that it’s for moral reasons by way of explaining her objection.

Tell her she has to cook it before bringing it, or not at all.

Many reasons. Because I don't want animals/animal products being cooked/consumed in my house, touching my plates/cups/utensils.

It's worth you looking at the official definition of veganism from the Vegan Society - particularly the part that says 'as far as possible and practical'. It's possible and practical, and very easy, in fact, to say no animal products to be consumed in my vegan home - other things, not so much!

FFS, have a day off !!

Morals are about more than just what food we choose to consume, or not, at one point in time though, that's why all the comments about morals are quite amusing.

This is wonderful. And special. www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/jewelled-squash-chestnut-mushroom-wreath

My sister and BIL are vegan, when I stay with them, I eat what they eat, I wouldn't dream of bringing a chicken along to cook, it's disrespectful to them

@TooBored1 "But to uninvite her over a bit of chicken seems extremely churlish and unkind. It's just food.for goodness sake."

What about the posters on here who are, presumably genuinely saying that they would rather not spend Christmas with their families if it means not eating meat? Chillis and unkind seem pretty mild ways to describe that awful behaviour!

You're being ridiculous. People "dictate" food choices all the time. I'm pretty sure OP dictates that she's vegan. DH doesn't eat fish, so when we're invited over we tell anyone he won't have that. A friend is allergic to nuts, so she says that. A friend's DS is super picky with food, so we check in about what he's currently eating. Loads of discussion happens about food every day.

*Churlish, not chillies. Chillies are nice!

no, if she wants to come then she goes meat free for a day. It won’t kill her!
perhaps she doesn’t realise how offensive this would be to many no -meat eaters.
I would tell her NO WAY but she’s welcome to bring a dish she might like - a veggie dish.

Agree it’s silly she can’t manage without meat for one meal. Not as if she’s going to go hungry with so much choice, much as my eyelid twitched slightly at you describing your own spread as “magnificent”. Just tell her you can’t handle meat in your house, end of. She’s being very insensitive and bolshy thinking it’s ok.