To not let my sister bring her own meat on Christmas day!

[FelizNavidadAmiga]

First off, we are a strictly vegan household for moral reasons. I invited my sister for Christmas lunch as she is recently divorced and has nowhere else to go. I usually put on a magnificent spread with roast vegetables, tagine, stuffed peppers, vine leaves, falafel, home made hummus etc. My sister has just sent me a message saying she's going to bring her own chicken to cook. AIBU to say no way! I don't want chicken cooking in my nice clean vegan oven! Plus the smell makes me feel ill 🤢 I don't want to upset her as she's very sensitive at the moment but surely she can do without chicken for 1 day.

Please No ( tinkly laugh)
Your meals absolutely amazing
I not vegetarian but I would that meal.
When I was single / divorced my sister hosted me ( as well as her extend family - me and another 6 plus) and my ds.
It was wonderful.
She made me so welcome and part of her family- I would have eaten jam sandwiches.

Could she cook it at home and just bring it along ready to re-heat/eat?
Will you be policing everyone's clothing choices too?

Op ignore the odd post about your food being boring - sounds good to me.

I'm going against the grain here - I say live and let live. Let her bring the chicken. Preferably she could roast it in her own oven so as not to sully yours.

But to uninvite her over a bit of chicken seems extremely churlish and unkind. It's just food.for goodness sake.

@FelizNavidadAmiga I am a meat eater but you can tell her your oven is going to be full so she cannot use it to cook her chicken. if you dont want to say this then just tell her you cannot allow meat of any description to contaminate your kitchen. actually, the tagine sounds delicious and I dont really like vegetables!

I think the op dosnt want chicken in any shape or form in her house. She doesn't want the smell of it even if warmed up in microwave, air fryer or any thing. She doesn't want it and I dont blame her.

How rude - bog standard? It certainly sounds magnificent to me!

It isn't reasonable to take meat to a vegan's house. I do agree the spread sounds quite boring though, and would feel a bit sad to see that as a supposed "feast". Like others we eat houmous and falafel wrap with veg every week or so, it's nice but it isn't special to have that as the centrepiece unless you have a lot more small dishes, and the main issue for a meat eater would be that it sounds so light on protein. You could do some more exciting dishes, there are lots of nice things we add for a party to cater for vegans.

Here are some ideas: salt and pepper tofu, chilli nut roast wellington style in a pastry (jus rol is nice and low effort), garlic bread with cashew dip, refried bean tortillas (guacamole, salsa etc), fig bites, courgette pakoras, pearl barley and flaked almond risotto, sweet potato parcels, vegan moussaka, roast 5 mushroom dip. It would be nice to add some Christmas bits like roast potatoes, tweak the falafel to include cranberry, pop roast honey chestnuts pieces in the houmous etc.

i can understand why you don’t want to cook a chicken but I do believe in catering for guests preferences. If you visited her I am sure she’d feed you vegetarian food. Can you ask that she pre-cooks her chicken and brings it sliced so she can have that. No cooking smells etc for you. It’s very unreasonable to force your choices on someone. Meat eaters don’t force vegetarians to eat meat with a meal. It’s Xmas, she deserves to have her choice. It’s not like a mid week meal she can just shrug about perhaps not enjoying that much.

Could she not have Quorn or something instead? They do loads of meat alternatives.

This.

It's one day, and you've been kind enough to invite your sister because she's recently divorced. The right and polite thing to do would be to accept the food that's on offer.

I've also just posted about Quorn - that's a good alternative she could bring on the day.

Could she gets a rotisserie chicken on Christmas eve - cut it up & reheat her portion of it on the day

Live and let live, I guess that doesn’t apply to chickens

No, she is being really rude. If your invitation to a vegan lunch in a vegan household isn’t acceptable to her she needs to make other plans. Tell her this kindly but firmly since she is going through a difficult time. In normal circumstances I wouldn’t even bother telling her that kindly.

I don’t think meat eaters catering for vegans and vegans catering for meat eaters are equivalents, though. Not eating meat is a moral or sometimes religious choice whereas eating meat is a choice of taste and preference so it is much less costly for a meat eater to forego meat for one day than the other way round. I say that as a meat enthusiast who generally finds vegans quite annoying.

I wonder if all my fellow omnivores here who think OP not allowing meat to be prepared or eaten in her home for ethical reasons is rude and inhospitable would be happy for a guest to bring their own dog meat over to sit down at the dining table and tear into on Christmas Day.

OP, kindly tell your sister no. If there are vegan foods you can add to the menu that will fill whatever gap she’s worried about offer to do that. But you’re absolutely not being rude for not allowing items or activities that violate your morals in your home. Nothing you are serving will require her to violate her moral code; serving vegan food to an omnivore is not the equivalent of serving meat to a vegan (what a dumb but persistent argument that one).

Bringing your own food to lunch or dinner at someone else's house (unless specifically asked to, or in a potluck situation, or if you have very complex dietary needs) is the height of rudeness. You're telling them their hospitality isn't good enough.

Bringing meat to a vegan's house goes even further beyond that because it's deliberately thumbing your nose at how they live.

Anyone who claims they can't go one day without meat is either lying to make a very boring point about veganism, or pathetic.

If you don't like the food someone cooks then don't accept invitations from them.

If she wants something “meaty” could she bring along some “beyond meat” burgers or something. I find people who can’t make be flexible for one meal incredibly annoying (serious health/ethical/religious considerations aside).

Came here to say this. We had it for dinner last night as a light supper.

It's a firm no from me, to the chicken that is. I think you're being really kind inviting her, I think it's really fucking rude when people start picking on what a host offers, unless you're allergic or something just politely eat the food , it's one day FFS.

This

I eat meat, but personally wouldn’t be comfortable going to the home of strict vegans and tucking into a big piece of meat in front of them. If you find the food they eat as a family that unappetising then just dont go.

We're going to my sister's vegan house for Christmas lunch and she's cooking a ham for us, because she wants to welcome us and accommodate our tastes. I'm taking a vegan salad and my brother is taking some seafood. We all know how to get along links adults.

Whether or not it’s an impressive/tasty meal is besides the point though isn’t it, that’s what’s being served. If it’s too unappetising/underwhelming just make an excuse and don’t go.

I think you're both just a bit BU.

It's your sister, and as host, you want to make her comfortable, so why not make her her favorite dish or something special, knowing what she likes. Or purchase a dish for her so you don't have to cook meat. You talk about your vegan feast as if anyone should love it...but I think you are in denial. Not many people really enjoy solely vegan food for festivals. But, if this is your moral outlook, I can also understand why it would feel very uncomfortable to cook meat in your home.

Your sister knows you're a vegan and should expect to eat the food you prepare and be a good guest. But, I feel bad for her stuck eating an unappetizing and unfulfilling meal on a special holiday just because you have a narrow and specific belief about food.

The two of you need some middle ground. Maybe she brings a prepared dish, that way you don't cook it in your home, and she's not stuck w/out something she likes.