Autism concerns Can I have a second pair of eyes please

[Firstimemum24]

22 months old development
Positive

1. answer to questions with yes and no
2. Answer to where’s and what’s questions
3. Give kisses and high five
4. Point , wave and clap
5. Ask for what she wants by pointing or using the word for it
6. Follow simple instructions such as : “ bring mum the fork “ pick it up and give it mummy “ come here and stop and wait for mom “ when outside . Sit on the couch , bath time and food time she sits on her little chair , put bunny to bed or bring me the blanket .
7. Uses over a 100 words and sometimes 2 word phrases : like feed baby , daddy train , mummy coffee
8. Says hi to people and kids

Concerns

1. toe walker ( I have been told it is a milestone 🤔)
2. Very shy and doesn’t like playgroups but then again she is a lonely child
3. Picky eater ( this is what she eats ) bolognese pasta homemade
4. Homemade spinach , pasta , tomato and carrot soup
5. Pasta with ricotta and tomato
6. Pasta pesto
7. Pasta with zucchine
8. Lasagna
9. Meatballs
10. Toast with butter and marmite
11. Almond croissant
12. Banana and kiwi
13. Pear and peaches
14. Apples
15. Vegetarian sausage and peanut butter toast
16. Eggs and cress sandwich
17. Chicken and Brie sandwich
18. Raw Carrots
19. Veggies crisps
20. Banana and blueberry pancakes

Also we can’t seem to have a back and forth conversation . What age does it develop ? ☺️

Are you saying her diet is a concern? Because having raised a few toddlers I can tell you now that she has a fantastic varied diet!

She's still a baby really though. She isn't even 2. Is she your first?

You got some good reassurance on your last thread here

I'm diagnosed autistic, as are two of my children, and I honestly can't see anything concerning here at all. I think your child's diet sounds good and very varied. I definitely wouldn't describe them as a picky eater

Your child uses gestures appropriately, doesn't have speech difficulties and can follow social cues appropriately for their age (saying hello etc). Kindly, I really don't think you have anything to worry about :)

That 100% is not a picky eater. My son is autistic. He has always eaten everything and is very adventurous.
she isn’t yet 2. They are not really capable of back and forth conversations.
Enjoy your child, read to her, have fun with her, take her swimming to museums etc.
If she is autistic she will still be the same child.
If you are worried about speech see a speech therapist.

My other son who is not autistic survived on a diet of burgers - just bread and meat nothing else , ham pizza, fish fingers and bread. Believe me she is not a picky eater

None of those three things you’ve listed stand out to me as being any concern at all.

She sounds perfectly normal, but you would probably benefit with some help for your anxiety.

The thing with autism is a lot of traits are entirely normal and age appropriate until they continue past a point when they aren't. DD not liking handdriers at 3 years was totally normal, they are loud and close to their heads. My DD refusing to enter a public toilet with handdriers at 13 way less typical.

If it isn't causing issues then wait until she's 5+ to start worrying.

Also it's largely inherited so if you or your partner don't have a family tree peppered with people with traits even if not diagnosed then it's unlikely.

My autistic child eats pasta (only certain shapes; must never have even touched a sauce), 3 specific fruits (only chopped in a certain way), particular brands of breakfast cereal and sometimes some toast (if type of bread is correct and toasting done perfectly) so no that diet is not an issue. Even my NT one doesn't eat that variety. All you can do is keep a note of all concerns and behaviours which will be useful if you end up in diagnosis process but even if you had a diagnosis I doubt it would help you that much - we got a diagnosis, signposting to support groups and a bit of advice on approaches (lots of which I had already found through my own research).

Honestly stop worrying and enjoy your child. Neither my autistic child nor my non autistic child had any language at all at 22 months! No pointing to indicate either. Back and forth language is not typical until well into 2, and not considered late until 3+

Am not sure what to say. Toddlers are just learning that there is more to eating than milk. Some embrace it. Others are horrified or simply don't like. Most go up and down with their yummy and yucks like a drunk yo-yo. Your kid is doing well with a varied and healthy diet.

Do you have autism in your or you dh's family? Otherwise I'm a bit surprised why you are worried, her diet is great, she interacts and communicates. Some people are shy so some babies are shy. Some babies take longer to build a fuller vocabulary. Does she like books? Being read to? Music? Swimming? Can she have find and enjoy herself? If yes to all these plus her diet is good there is no need to worry until you feel her communication skills are lagging behind. Does she have plenty of toys to develop motor skills.

One tips, do not use your phone, tablet or TV as a babysitter. It's so harmful, especially smaller devices but also current hyper content watched on TV

Can't see any problems there. Was your HV happy at the 2 year check (if you've had this? My dc's was around 22 months).
I wouldn't expect a 2 year old to have a "back and forth conversation". Closer to 3 for that.

This! My autistic DS ate toast, potatoes, ham and chicken nuggets. Nothing else. Your DC’s diet sounds great for a child who isn’t yet two. Nothing in your description points to autism apart from the toe walking. Lots of non-autistic children are toe walkers.

She is not technically a picky eater. That’s a good, healthy, varied diet at that age.

Toe walking is normal until 5. If she is toe walking at 5 bring her to a doctor. By 5, It can be a sign of lots of things (or nothing) and isn’t an official “tick box” item for Autism.

just keep reading to her, bringing her places and communicating with her. She doesn’t have any red flags and seems to be developing normally.

Baby walkers / jumperoos can cause toe walking if used in excess

@Firstimemum24 So my son is 18 now and for his entire life there has only been one kind of sandwich, a peanut butter and jam sandwich. No other sandwich exists, no other sandwich should be made / eaten / looked at. When he was 2 there was screaming at a cheese and jam sandwich "take it off take it off!" (the jam) .Etc

And he doesn't even have an official diagnosis. I just thought I'd share this with you because it is this kind of rigidity that lends itself to an Autism diagnosis, not the varied and wonderful selection of foods your child is willing to eat.

None of that sounds worrying at all. Her diet is very good. Her speech is normal.

Are you generally an anxious person?

For comparison, one of my DCs lived on plain Cheerios for about nine months. After that, their diet was very limited up to age 18. Now as an adult, will eat anything.

The rest of my DCs (four others) were all very picky - wouldn't eat anything green, wouldn't eat anything with certain textures (mushroom / banana texture), wouldn't eat fish, hated various different potato presentations, insisted on certain pasta shapes on grounds that they tasted right and all others tasted wrong. Wouldn't eat fruit, and on and on and on. All eat normally now apart from one who is still extremely picky and would happily survive on chocolate, Genoa salami, and cheap white bread.

None of them ND.

no signs of autism there.

There's a lot of carbs and processed stuff in her diet but certainly not as much as the average picky eating small child.

Does she flap her hands or repeatedly open & close her hands?
If you point at something will she follow and look at what you're pointing?
This is the age I began having concerns about my DD and she was diagnosed at 4. It's a long process but if you genuinely have concerns then take her to your local Speech & Language drop in (shouldn't need GP referral) and ask their professional opinion. This is the route you would mostly likely have to go down to begin the diagnosis pathway anyway, area depending. That's how our process begins locally. No GP involved at all.

However from what you've stated on here, none of that rings any bells for me as a parent to a DD with ASD

Toe walking isn't an issue under 2, neither is being a bit shy or being a bit picky with food. She's only a toddler, my advice would be to just enjoy her and try to stop obsessing about ASD.

Thank you all for your wonderful responses. She does enjoy books and points at what she sees and being red to , she also loves to feed her teddies , put them to bed or on a walk in the pram , pretend to cook food , stack up towers and make me a coffee with her pretend d kitchen ☺️ she follows my point , she does open and shut her hands but in relation to the nursery rhyme song and does max twice a day . She loves dancing and does all the nursery rhymes actions . She loves playing with her pull along toys and little cars . When she has tantrums they don’t last long ( 5 minutes max ) she sleeps 12 hours per night . But her HV feels like she is not social hence a referral to a paediatrician. She is an only child and my first ☺️

Are you in the uk. Your child sounds perfectly normal so I am surprised she has been referred to a paediatrician.