AIBU to think that you don't change your baby's nappy in the middle of a coffee shop?

[Anonymous2003]

I was in a coffee shop today and there was a family with two babies sitting a couple tables up from us. I looked over and I saw the father changing the baby's nappy on the seat (the soft seat side of the table, not on a hard chair). I know it wasn't on the table or anything and I think it was only a wet nappy but AIBU to think that was a bit odd... I wasn't in the toilets so not certain if there was a baby changing mat in there.

You put a portable changing mat on the floor and do it in the toilet. If no toilets still on the floor. No one wants to sit in a seat that's had a baby changed in it.

It's better than it once was, but I was responding to someone who said all toilets have them.

All toilets certainly don't and all mens toilets even less.

A few weeks ago I was in a cafe and only changing was disabled toilets. There was a disabled user in it. There were also a couple other people in the queue waiting to use baby change. After 10 minutes, killing arms and back and the original person still being in the toilet I did take my baby back to table and change (on a mat) on the bench, that I did wipe down after with antibacterial wipes.

In the summer I'd have taken him to the car and done it in the boot or back seats but it's too cold now.

Quite. Baby pee is still pee, not holy water.

What was so urgent that it couldn't wait ? We've all had babies and many of us have managed not to change them on a cafe seat. In cloth nappies too, which are far less tolerant of a delay
sounds like you were just too impatient to wait your turn.

I suspect more than half the adult population either is or has been a baby parent, so I’d question your use of “normal”

I wouldn't do it, but I wouldn't massively judge someone else doing it. How old was baby? World of difference between a tiny 2 week old who hasnt had their jabs and a stinky wriggly crawling 11 month old!!!!
I've seen someone changing their baby in the baby area of a soft play. Thought that was out of order! That's literally where my child crawls. Luckily he slept through the whole time we were there while his big brother played but still!!!

Would you be happy with a dog pissing on a coffee shop floor and having the owner clean it up while you are eating/drinking.
You said the wet nappy didn't smell. It may not to you as parents can be nose-blind to familiar offensive smells.
It is disgusting to change a nappy in a food area, regardless of what may happen in one's own home

I'd already waited over 10 minutes and the person in there was showing no signs of coming out any time soon. Baby was restless, starting to cry and trying to wriggle out of my arms, there were 2 more waiting to change their babies ahead of me. And there was less than 15 minutes left on my parking.

At the end of the day I'd have been unreasonable to try restraining him while he screams to the whole café and I didn't want a £120 fine for overstaying on my car parking. So I changed him quickly on the bench, cleaned up after ourselves and went on our way.

Had their been adequate provision of changing facilities wouldn't have happened.

Or like a PP said "Angel Pee"

Gross if there was a suitable alternative, but I would probably done the same if there was no baby change facilities in the coffee shop or nearby.

I think your own baby's comfort is usually more important to you than other peoples' comfort (at least when it comes down to a clear choice between one or the other).

Luckily I only ever encountered this issue in summer when going outside and changing them in their pram bassinet was an option.

For a very small infant or newborn and a wet nappy then no I wouldn't be bothered.

Disgusting, entitled behaviour.

I so couldn’t get worked up about this. Do you really think there aren’t already bazillions of germs on every single soft surface in a cafe?

Whip the wet nappy off, pop it in a nappy bag, hold baby’s bum up in the meantime, whip the clean nappy under - stick nappy together, redress baby, sanitise hands. I can’t see how a baby’s little bum (from a wet nappy) that probably didn’t touch the fabric (because quite frankly who wants the fabric germs on the baby’s delicate bum) can be more gross than what will already be on there.

Disgusting.

It's disgusting. On a recent holiday I saw a dad change his son's nappy in a pedestrian zone in front of loads of people.

You carry on. I cant believe how ridiculous some posters are being.

if you laid the baby on the changing table in a loo then came and lay the baby on the seat the same germs would transfer and still be on the cafe seat anyway!

It's disgusting. How can people behave like this.

There is a huge difference!

No one wants to see dirty nappies, pee, poo, or genitials when they are eating.

I hate seeing this. Not only is it disgusting but babies deserve dignity too.

At a soft play I was at recently a woman changed her 5 year old’s dirty nappy on the floor next to the play equipment. Her son had significant additional needs and I can only imagine how hard life probably is for them both, but I felt very sorry for him not being afforded the basic privacy and dignity of being changed in a toilet (of which there were several, including a large changing table).

I think there’s a big difference between changing a 5 YO nappy and changing a baby nappy.

Babies are naked in front of other people all the time. Whenever I take mine to get weighed they strip off for the scales and there’s usually several people queuing up who can see it all. I have to take the nappy off too!

Grim!
If I'm having a coffee and a pastry or similar I don't want to see such poor hygiene on display

Absolutely disgusting. The people who think this is ok are disgusting. Their homes must be absolutely rank.

So no one should have to sit in a seat where a baby has been changed but it's OK for a tiny baby to be placed on the toilet floor with the amount of germs and filth there is in public toilets? If you have a portable mat and/or use your lap this is a non issue. Like I said, not something I could get worked up about.

I'd gouge my eyes out if this happened to a table in a café. OK I wouldn't, but please parents do not change a wet nappy without first covering surfaces with a towel or a blanket or similar. Absolutely full stop do not ever under any circumstances change a nappy in full view in a café if it's more than just a wet nappy.