Husband has wrapped Christmas presents so badly I’ve had to throw the paper away

[ThatFunRubyHelper]

I have some Christmas presents needing to be wrapped. My DH has not wrapped presents before. I just heard him in the bedroom with the wrapping paper and tape.

Hes wrapped my mums Christmas present so badly I’ve I’ve had to rip the paper off and throw it away. I’m so annoyed as there wasn’t much Christmas wrapping paper left and I was planning on wrapping them neatly.

Just had to have a vent! He’s now annoyed at my becuase I got annoyed at him!

I think you should have left them. People are not born knowing ‘how to wrap.’
I get you op- it sets my teeth on edge but seriously- let it go.

I would have left it but tbh I’m not allowed to wrap in my household because apparently I suck, it’s going to get ripped off anyway. I would have just said “er Dh wrapped that” if it really bothered me.

Thank you for this.
I treasure the cards received from my dad in recent years as he has dementia and is almost blind. His writing is illegible and in odd places on the card, but it's from him, and I love him.

Wrap ones own gifts?

The gifts in this scenario are not for the OP.

If someone dared criticise the wrapping on a gift I'd got for them, they'd never receive a present from me again.

Yeah my partner, his brothers, my dad, nephews all wrap presents fine. He won’t have to do it again if it’s shit…..I’d have kept them and when giving (in his presence) be happily saying that DH did the wrapping this year…..

Scary

The paper will be ripped off anyway.
Wasteful and belittling.

You should see how bad I am at wrapping presents you'd have a meltdown. And I've wrapped them before. And I use brown plain paper.
I'd have left it and laughed

I’m sure plenty of males also do their own wrapping. OP didn’t ask her DH to do it but he was in there wrapping up her mums present and then it gets unwrapped and Op does it because it’s not good enough 🤷‍♀️

Just like all other household tasks.

Do it badly so you never need to get asked again.

We know what is going on here 🤣

I think it is sweet that he tried. I'm sure the first time you wrapped a gift it wasn't great. I would have given the gift to my mother and said that he wrapped it and it was his first time wrapping, it's charming.

I voted YABU. Ive been wrapping for decades and still never nanage to do a good job. I just don't have very good fine motor skills. If you have a particular way you want it done, best to do yourself.

I think the point was that nobody really later remembers how a present is wrapped unless it was spectacularly different from 'normal' and because of a very good (and poignant) reason.

Fussing that somebody doesn't wrap presents to the same exacting standards as you do is a bit like criticising somebody else's fashion sense.

If you wouldn't want to be seen dressed like they are, then dress yourself differently; but you have to remember that they are not you, and so it's not up to you.

Similarly, you have every right if you're an arse to reject presents that are given to you, if you don't consider them to be adequately presented; but unless you're wrapping it yourself, it's simply not up to you to dictate.

Gosh, I'm sure if you offered your wrapping services in the local area some people would take you up on it. I hate wrapping gifts.

Surely this is a joke. You'll be one of those people on here later moaning about all the expectations of Christmas having to be perfect!

If my husband unwrapped a gift I'd wrapped because it wasn't perfect enough for our household image I would be absolutely furious! It's unkind and disrespectful of a nice gesture.

Not wanting a gift looking like its been wrapped by a toddler, is hardly 'exacting standards'

Ewwwwwwwww 🤮. We really do have to move away from thinking men doing everyday tasks is "sweet" especially when they make a shit job of it.

I was replying to the fact that the person who posted blamed the fact he wasn't good at wrapping on the woman not asking him to do it. Why are we ok with the idea that men need asking to do everyday normal things?!
He is an adult and by now should have taken it upon himself at some point in his life to have wrapped a bloody present.

Aye OK then. Never wrapped presents before? So you have never received a present off your hubster? Or did he just chuck them in a Tesco bag for life or something?

Do what you like. I don't feel the need to criticise my husband for doing something imperfectly when it's the first time he's done it because I chose to marry someone decent, who contributes more than half in chores and competence to the household, who doesn't behave like a manchild, who treats me with love and respect everyday. So I'll do the same in return.

For me, the trick is to choose the right partner so you don't end up with someone who uses weaponised incompetence. You go with "We really do have to move away from thinking men doing everyday tasks is "sweet" especially when they make a shit job of it" I'll go with having high standards for the person I chose to be with from the start so none of it is an issue.

So why advise another woman to think her husband never having wrapped a present for her or anyone else in his whole life that it's sweet? And that she should fawn over his first attempt with her mother like you would with a toddler?
Classic case of buying into weaponised incompetence.
Doesn't sound like you are applying your high standards of men to this scenario.

@jannier

He only buys for his mum and I wrap it. I wrap the kids and my families because I'd rather do it. He doesn't even know what I've bought.

I've never mowed the grass in my life. It doesn't mean if I mowed it badly first time it would be weaponised incompetence. It doesn't mean I don't do my share of work around the house. Just because he has never wrapped a present it doesn't mean he's one of the shit men. That's what you are assuming. I'm not.

If OP had said he was a pig in all ways then I would have a different opinion. My interpretation from her post is that she's very particular and if people don't do it her way it's not right. Neither of us know the full truth of the situation, it's never possible to know it from a few paragraphs on one person's perspective. So get off your high horse, the purpose of MN is different views on situations.

And I'm not applying my high standards to all men, I'm saying my reaction to this situation would be based on knowing who my husband is and treating him as such, not assuming he had deliberately done a bad job, or had been lazy for never wrapping a present. You seem to unaware that there are unpleasant women out there too.