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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Fall out between DH and I… who is BU??

103 replies

TheGoldEagle · 15/12/2024 18:34

DH has been working away for 6 week. Meanwhile, I’ve been working and taking care of our two DC. We don’t have much of a support network here, and unfortunately I was quite unwell while he was gone, so it’s been tricky. DH’s work trips are genuinely not very labour intensive. There is a lot of nights out (optional) but he enjoys that element of it, and the work days are short. I never, ever begrudge him going away and have supported this for many years.

DH got home yesterday and gave my DC a little gift each. A pair of slippers. He got the sizes totally wrong. Bought a pair for age 2 for our 7 year old and age 5 for our 10 year old. The sizes were in EU sizes, but he only needed to text me or Google their U.K. sizes and check. He had promised them a gift and both were so excited, but both acted as though they weren’t disappointed, but as their mum, I knew they were.

Also, I spent most of the day yesterday cleaning and the plan was that DH was going to spend the day with the kids and I was going to catch up on my own work, which I’ve fallen behind with, as I’ve had a lot going on lately. When DH was on his return journey yesterday, he text saying he didn’t feel great. He seemed fine but a little congested when he got home. And today, he has spent the whole day in bed. I took the kids out, since they had been stuck home the day before, and am now just falling further behind.

The kids were so desperate to see him and I feel like he’s just totally let them down. But also wonder if I’m just being annoyed because I have had no choice but to power through, and he’s now having a day in bed at the first sign of the sniffles!

Is it me? Am I the issue here?

OP posts:
biscuitsandbooks · 16/12/2024 13:31

Imagine it the other way around. OP has just returned from a six week work trip and is feeling rough. Husband says she can't rest and must do xyz. It'd be classed as abuse.

No woman would take herself off to bed and ignore her kids after not seeing them for six weeks, no matter how tired or shit she felt.

NoBinturongsHereMate · 16/12/2024 13:45

justasking111 · 16/12/2024 13:26

Mine was dying at the weekend I was making honey and lemon at 3am. Daft wazzock wasn't using his inhalers either. His coughing was shaking the windows. We had some amoxicillin from his previous chest infection so am making him take those.

I bloody hope I don't get it.

Edited

You should never have left over antibiotics, or take them when unprescribed. Two part courses (one possibly for a non-bacterial or wrong-bacterial infection) will just lead to antibiotic resistance. You will be at least partly to blame for the next super bug.

justasking111 · 16/12/2024 14:25

NoBinturongsHereMate · 16/12/2024 13:45

You should never have left over antibiotics, or take them when unprescribed. Two part courses (one possibly for a non-bacterial or wrong-bacterial infection) will just lead to antibiotic resistance. You will be at least partly to blame for the next super bug.

Nope not in this case. Husband is advised to start the course and contact the surgery on Monday. Which he did. They will always give him a just in case course because they're not available at weekends.

My DIL has spare courses in case her tonsillitis kicks off at the weekend.

The alternative for both of them is cluttering up A&E at weekends.

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