Question for Jevovah’s Witnesses or ex Witnesses

[Jozephine]

Not really an AIBU, but not sure where to ask this. I’ve got friends who are JW. The know I don’t believe, and are very closed about their beliefs to me and just shut down conversation if I talk about religion. So my question is around death and funerals.

my friends were recent converts and none of their extended family or friends are JW. There have been a number of funerals in their family recently. As these family members were not JW will the belief be that they will be burnt in the eternal fires at judgement day? I can’t square it with my friend saying that her dad is now ‘at peace’ if she believes that’s going to be his fate? If I believed the things JWs claim then I would be a mess thinking of all my dead loved ones who would have such a fate waiting for them. How does it work?

However, it is not worth getting into arguments about. You have your opinions, I, and others, have ours.

It works perfectly because I don’t make up nonsense about things I know nothing about.

@BIossomtoes can you please then clarify exactly what is made up in the multiple posts that disagree with your views?

And yours is different to mine. You did say they discourage independent reading of the Bible, that’s something I’ve never heard of, my mum read her Bible every day.

Already done it. RTFT.

I bet she read it alongside WTBTS publications, though. Because they are "needed" to help make sense of it and to stop you falling into wrong doctrine

@BIossomtoes

I don't think anyone is saying that all JWs are lying evil bastards.

I'm an ex JW. We all had our own exit experience. Some worse than others. Fortunately for me, my JW parents still talk to me and my siblings. However, I lost all of my friends.
I know others that left who had such an awful time of it, they lost their entire family. One ended his life.
Maybe you only know the lovely experiences.

I personally don't hold the individuals to account. Well not entirely. I blame those men at the top who make the silly rules. The sheep follow blindly.
I'm glad you had a good exit and are not bitter.
I'm not that bitter but would always warn people off them

Furthermore, not only do we find that people cannot see the divine plan in studying the Bible by itself, but we see, also, that if anyone lays the scripture studies aside, even after he has used them, after he has become familiar with them, after he has read them for ten years — if he then lays them aside and ignores them and goes to the Bible alone, though he has understood his Bible for ten years, our experience shows that within two years he goes into darkness.“ [The Watchtower, September 15, 1910, p. 298].

We must not lose sight of the fact that God is directing his organization… To turn away from Jehovah and his organization, to spurn the direction of ‘the faithful and discreet slave,’ and to rely simply on personal Bible reading and interpretation is to become like a solitary tree in a parched land.”[The Watchtower, June 1, 1985, pp. 19-20].

I clearly remember reading the second quote here are part of an article in the Watchtower in the mid-80s. Round about the same time there were articles about the evils of oral sex, masturbation and various sexual positions and acts.

She didn’t. She read her Bible by itself every day.

Maybe they've since had

Nooooo light

I'm glad you had a good exit and are not bitter.

Thank you @Horrace, me too.

A full exit can take years.
You can be out physically but still have a tiny percentage of belief.

I think it was a good 10 years to rid myself completely of that last smidging of belief. And it took research of the history of the religion to do.

Up until then I still stuck up for them like some posters here.

I believe that's what is happening with some of the comments I'm reading. I can see myself 15 years ago

Your mum was an outlier, then. See the quotes I posted above. It has always been actively discouraged to read your Bible without a watchtower publication to keep you right.

Of course, there is always the whole New Light rubbish that is used to justify changes which the GB are forced into.

I to am glad you had positive experiences, that doesnt mean, though, that everyone else is lying or spreading misinformation.

New light? 😁

I was excitedly told (by my JW cousin) that JW men are allowed beards now, and also, there are now circumstances where women can wear 'slacks' to do ministry/meetings. I was excited for her but it's ridiculous you should be 'allowed' to to either.

Then there's the Norway situation!

Well quite

More examples of the GB making up silly rules as they go along.

I'm of a generation when men couldn't wear white socks either.

I'm sure there was a scripture to back it up

@Loulo6098

What's the Norway situation?

They’re no longer legally recognised as a religion in Norway. A move I’m sure they interpret as being proof that they follow the true path because persecution was predicted in the scriptures.

Or when the Light was that short hair would make women go bald do women were only allowed long hair. That was still current light in the 80s and 90s!

Another thing that never happened. My mum and just about every sister I ever met had short hair. You can’t help yourself, can you?

I am probably a good bit older than you so, yes, it did happen
What would it benefit me to make this stuff up.

I can post the quotes if you like, as I did above.

I don't remember that rule but I do recall it was a view of some. My friend Rachel wasn't allowed to cut her hair short for that reason. Girls had to keep their hair long in her family.
I, on the other hand was.

Well this has been very enlightening for me. My friend has certainly changed her dress since becoming JW. She did tell me that she is now allowed to wear smart trousers, which seemed a reasonable adjustment bearing in mind how long she has to stand outside with the cart every few weeks.

It dates back to the 1020s when short hair became fashionable. The justification was obviously Paul's teaching on hair being a woman's crowning glory. The teaching was also that women's hair needed the oils from being long to keep it healthy.

@Lessstressedhemum

That's the one

Crowning glory 🤣🤣🤣

I inherited my mothers fine hair so was never allowed to have it long

That should have said 1920s