To have said no to this man coming into my house?

[clodethewindie]

I got home from work yesterday and the new neighbour was outside and so we introduced ourselves, made small talk etc.

My house and 7 others (including new neighbours) on the street are the same design/build etc. Neighbour mentioned that he’d gone to all those houses and they’d all let him have a look around and could he come in and see what I’ve done with my place …

Now I get it’s interesting to see what others would do with the same space but also as a lone female I don’t want to have a man I don’t know come into my house for a tour. He seemed a bit putout that I said no.

I'm uneasy letting workers ive booked come into my house.
I think you were well within reason to not let him into your house

No, I would not let him in.

Sole female or not, you did the right thing.

I would also say no. He has seen the others and if they're all built the same what is he expecting to see? Surely he isn't that interested in paint colours and settees?.
There is a fine line between a good neighbour and nosy. You were right to say no.

He must not have much unpacking to do eh?

I would say no to anyone who asked that but definitely a man when on my own; that’s very odd and I bet others didn’t know how to say no.

He claimed "all" those other neighbours let him in? I smell BS. Most people would be wary or letting a stranger in, particularly a strange man. I'd watch out with this one.

What a weirdo - Def no to letting him in!!

He was lying. You did the right thing.

No man comes to my flat unless

He's invited,
He's the landlord (or rather the landlady's husband),
Or
He's an emergency repair guy

He was probably lying about the other neighbours. Now you know to keep away from him.

I most ikely would let him. But I don't think for a second that you are wrong for saying no. It's your house, you get to decide what you are comfortable with and it's perfectly okay if you are not comfortale with this.

I bet you £100 he was testing your boundaries.

Crazy that anyone would let him in, let alone a lone female.

I'm struggling to understand why he needs to look around in other people's homes to see what they've done with their houses. I'm more surprised all the other neighbours let him in. What business is it of his what other people have done with their homes? Can he not think of his own design ideas?

could be scoping the place out - does he have a family? Does he know you are single?

Defo did the right thing. New neighbour or not, he's still a stranger. I can't believe he was taken aback when you said no! Fancy expecting to be let in just like that.
I'd ask the neighbours too if what he is saying is true!

This is an excellent set of rules.

I don’t live alone. I would not have let him in.
I would avoid him in future. Just a quick hello and walk on by.
I hope he hasn’t upset you.

This is a good point. You only have his word that all the other neighbours let him in.

Good for you. He can fuck right off!

To be fair, around here, neighbours are always checking each other's houses out for ideas on how this building work or that would make a diference. our house was grand central station when we did our loft as we were the first ones in the neighbourhood to do so - we had people popping in at all stages too!

Doesn't mean OP has to let this complete stranger into her house. But it is entirely possible that he has genuinely been in and out of everyone else's house to have a look around.

YANBU.
I live on a brand new estate. I've often thought I'd like a nosy in the other houses to see what they've done with them. It would be really interesting to see everyone's different ideas in the same style of house.

I'd never dream of actually asking though! He's a cheeky fucker and obviously a bit stupid if he can't see how inappropriate that was.

Very smart response. What a creep. How dare he act affronted when refused!

Thanks. I ought to have included the 2nd under the 1st really. Legally I don't need to let the landlord in unless I invite him (except in an emergency).