Every single thing I say my partner gets annoyed at and I'm wrong and I need humbled

[pij]

The conversation starts out nice and fine and we connect but then he will randomly say I over generalise things and piss him off so much. What I said was that (after he told me at 28 I'm getting passed it) people look their best 25+ like at 18 everyone looks a bit awkward and like they need to grow into themselves. This pissed him off so much for what reason? I feel I looked goofy at 18 (when we got together) and have grown into myself. As have my friends and even celebrities you say. This is also MY opinion so why would it be "over generalising and so wrong"?

Then he said I need humbling when I joked in a conversation in the hot sibling. So obviously a joke. He does this all the time. He thinks I need humbling I'm too aware I'm "attractive" I need brought down a peg.

Why would he want to make every conversation awful between us? I've never had a conversation where I'm constantly wrong, he gets pissed off at my opinion, I'm stupid and don't know anything. It's like he made it so we don't get on just for the fun of it because we can have amazing conversations where we connect and it feels so good and nice. Then like tonight my thoughts are so wrong etc.

I cannot stand the me saying a thought and it's wrong

It's got me to the point I think I offend everyone with anything I say like saying I think people look their best 25 onwards. How is that possibly offensive??? How is that wrong. Or everything I say in conversations is so wrong and everyone will be mad at me for speaking. Because he's now mad at me and gone off because I said people look their best 25 onwards??

This isn't even making sense

He doesn't want you to value yourself, because he knows he's rotten and if you knew your worth you wouldn't be with him. So he runs you down and keeps you off balance. It's deliberate.

When I speak about things he always tells me I'm so stupid

Like there's a lady I know with her own child and is in a relationship with a man with three kids and he didn't see them and she doesn't care. I said that's horrific and my personal experience with her she needs male validation so badly she's willing to comprise herself as a mother to which he said you're so fucking stupid you have no idea how people work that's so over generalising.

Why are you doing in a relationship with someone who treats you like this?

Leave. As soon as you can. He doesn't love you and doesn't even seem to like you. And he sounds like an utter cunt - 'Need humbling', FFS, the audacity of the man.

Yeah, I'd quite like five minutes alone with this man and a very sharp pencil tbh. What a colossal wanker.

Run Op! He’s been listening to Andrew Tate and other angry incels/redpill podcasts. They all make that misogynistic comment about women being past it at age 25. And of course he would like to indirectly defend a deadbeat father of three which is why he got angry with you saying that woman made a bad choice.

These kind of men love to crush the spirits and self esteem of women.

He is an angry misogynist and most likely doesn’t like you or any woman much . Get out while you can.

Chuck the man in the bin and set it on fire to save every other woman becoming his future partner.

Seriously though OP, do bin him. And do it soon. He's awful and will erode your self esteem 🌺

Sounds like negging
"To

1. insult or undermine (someone) in the belief that diminished self-confidence will make them more receptive to sexual advances.
2. "his seduction technique seems to be to neg her into submission"

Dumb him. He's emotionally abusive and he'll continue to make you miserable. No partner should be constantly telling you you're stupid.
And telling you you're getting past it at 28 -wtf? He wants you to feel too insecure to find another partner.

Don’t have kids with him. Find yourself and/or someone else.

Do you know this is a form of abuse? Because it is. Is the relationship worth you being put down and undermined constantly?

You’ve wasted ten years with this loser?

He’s trash. Put him in the bin where he belongs.

He treats you this way because he wants you to feel inferior to him. He likes putting you down and making you feel stupid. End it.

Time to move on. My ex husband got like this towards the end. Like if I said the sky was blue he’d find a way I was wrong and stupid to say that.

he said you're so fucking stupid

The only response to this is to dump. How fucking dare he?

You don’t sound quite angry enough OP. How old was he when he you got with him at 18?
Very telling that he puts you down harshly when you express opinions that 1.Aging women might be attractive. 2. Deadbeat dads are shit but you’re on to it.

Yes it’s negging. You’re just a woman and getting past your prime and he’s doing you a favour being with you. Don’t get up yourself.
Do you live together? Any children? Do you work? Do you plan a future together?

As to what to do about it. Calmly tell him you are sick of being disrespected and spoken down to. That you are not stupid. You are not a teenager any more but a grown adult with your own opinions.

What you're describing is emotional/ psychological abuse.

Is this what you want the rest of your life to look like?

You have long outgrown this man. Do not let him drag you down.

Leave. Be on your own as a single woman for a little while. Discover what makes your heart sing. Realise how amazing you are. And when the time is right you will meet someone who appreciates you.

Your fit and he knows it . He knows he’s punching well above his weight with you so he puts you down to make himself feel inferior.
He’s a complete and utter twat.
My ex was like this and it’s a form of abuse to reel you in . He won’t change he’s showing you his true colours . Get away from him and run as fast as you can. If you stay he’ll run you down to the point where you feel worthless. I can’t even look in a mirror anymore because of how ex made me feel.
Please don’t be me and get out now xx

He is punching above his weight and instead of being appreciative you took notice of him he wants to bring you down and knock your confidence so you won’t look elsewhere

Time to tell him that relationships where one party is always trying to humble the other don’t last

So time to pack his bags

It’s good you can see that lady is compromising herself but you are also compromising yourself.

I think it’s horrific that you are with a man who treats you like this. Why do you need his male validation so badly? What’s preventing you from leaving him?

When I speak about things he always tells me I'm so stupid

My boyfriend has never told me I’m stupid even once, let alone “fucking stupid”, let alone multiple times.

This man is well beneath you and you deserve someone better.

Why are you with him when you could be with someone who loves you?

he sounds vile. This will only get worse over time. Your partner should be your biggest cheerleader (and vice versa) and this guy clearly isn’t yours. Don’t allow him to speak to you like that. I’d be ending the relationship and not looking back.

He clearly has no respect for you, he's undermining you and making you doubt yourself. It's toxic