To be offended

[Accbabymom1994]

I am so upset and angry , I don't understand why men think they are some kind of gods , and especially my husband doesn't think what he is . He sent me this and I'm so upset about it, do you think he meant it as a joke and I've taken it to heart?

No. And I’ve made it clear I wouldn’t be happy about it. What is disproportionate is OP seemingly thinking this is her partner saying she isn’t good enough. I don’t think it means that at all. I would be talking to him about what he seems to think is ‘funny’.

Yes he is

He knows he's fucked up because he keeps on calling me

I think this needs a WTF type response. Someone obtuse enough to send this (sorry OP) is not going to read between the lines of a silence.

Ask him to explain the joke.

That is so crass, it is not remotely funny. And even more hurtful as you have a disabled child.

"I intend to not speak to him"

I was 100% on your side until you said that.
Giving someone the silent treatment is the most ludicrous way for an adult to deal wtih a situation. It accomplishes nothing.

ah crossposted! ignore me, hope you get a cringing apology forthwith.

For reference, we have been married for 11 years have a shit sex life , I used to think there's something wrong with me because he always mak3s me feel like shit , but now I've realised he has a low libido is lazy , I'm not ugly , he is 38 but jokes like he's 12 I'm sick of his attitude, he doesn't understand when u explain to him , I am already dealing with a lot with my son , now he's 5 my husband has started to contribute towards helping me out . He supports me financially and does tak3 us out every Sunday but I don't feel like he respects me . He doesn't care if you humiliate him either I think he doesn't know what respect is

I would be asking him why he sent me this and why does he think it is funny. Is it the objectifying of women that makes it funny? Or saying that disabled people are less than? Which bit of that "joke" is the humour in?
Make him squirm. He's a dickhead.

It is not excusable but the only possible reason is that he is not humorous but trying to be. I have noticed that some people who aren’t naturally humorous get it wrong when they try to be. He got this very wrong.

If he sent it to you I’d say it’s definitely a joke but it’s horrible

That's why I'm gonna ignore him

Confronting him won't help me now he's just gna shout and get everyone on his side by saying I'm too sensitive and I take things too literally . I want him to know I'm upset because that will make him think . If I speak to him he will just push the issue aside and get on with it . I want to ponder on it .

It's not funny, it's distasteful and unethical.

I wouldn't want to be with someone who would pass this about let alone send it to their partner.

Erm yes I do that’s exactly what I think. I think we see time and time again on the relationship boards women who are put down and critised by their husbands who are then told “it’s a joke you’re too sensitive”

You have a low bar on how to treat people if you think a shit joke like this is not unkind. I can’t imagine sending this to anyone I thought highly of.

Sounds like a lot of work OP.

This is how decent people respond.
It’s horrible to think that some people don’t mind because they themselves are not disabled. It isn’t hard to see why despite years of legislation, disabled people are still not seen and treated as equal human beings.

Arranged marriage , joint family system, I I tell his parents they will sort him out but I need him to squirm for a bit

He is an idiot. Men can be idiots. I would put it down to a momentary lack of judgement and also tell him all about himself and that you do not find this funny. Tell him to do better. Then draw a line under it. I wouldnt end a marriage of it but ai would sure tell him about himself. My husband this week told me a joke about tinned fish and fannys and I told him just what i thought about that. He clearly hadnt thought through his audience. He was a moron and now he knows all about it. However, you have said he will shout and cause problems if you do say something, therefore that is a reason to end a marriage. A proper response from him would be, oh I am sorry as I didnt think it through, I will not share this kind of horrible joke again, ai can see now why it is just not nice and why it has upset you. If he doesnt respond like that then hes an arse and you should leave

I haven't been diagnosed but I have Adhd . He's probably referencing to that too

But that’s illogical as even following the ‘logic’ of the ‘joke’ OP isn’t disabled.

Can you refresh my memory where I said this was kind?

As I’ve said, extremely clearly for those with comprehension skills, I wouldn’t be happy receiving this. I would be talking to my partner about why they thought it was acceptable. I don’t understand why you’ve took such umbrage by me pointing out that I don’t think this is aimed at telling OP that she isn’t good enough?

I am deeply offended.. I'm severely disabled... am l not good at all?
It's disgusting.. ( also from experience it's harder trying to find a disabled spot).
What an horrible horrible species of a man.

It wouldn't bother me.
But then i dont get offended with everything.

People find things funny when they relate to it. They share things with people they relate to. It's not really a stretch.

I wish I was like that