To feel let down by friends

[Octonautstotherescue]

DH left. He was violent so it was a relief. Now on own and very lonely. When friends aware it started off with texts of how awful and hope you’re ok but this it has turned to silence. Am I being unreasonable to have wanted more support? They all knew him - wondering if they are actually taking his side.

OP, I know exactly what you're experiencing, and it's shit.
I lost, what I thought were my closest friends, before DH died, but had lots of other friends.
Or so I thought.
You need to remember that you are not the centre of their lives, that, although they love you, you don't figure in the day to day headspace they endure every day.
Once you 'get' that, their attitude and responses will make far more sense.
I got tied up in knots thinking no one cared. They did, but not necessarily in a demonstrative way.
I had 2 friends I could just say ' I need you' and they would be there ( one via messaging/phone, one in person). BUT, I had to ask. I had to say 'I need you', because everyone is going along in their own lives, acknowledging their friend who is suffering, bit assuming all is okay because they haven't heard anything.
Use your voice. If nothing else, it will show you who your true friends are.

In my experience things have changed a lot over my lifetime. IME people and friends of the past actually gave a damn about other people and weren't obsessed with being "too busy" to care, unable to answer the door unless a visitor had gone through a vigorous pre-visit booking application, and so self-absorbed they could actually manage to offer care and support to someone other than themselves!

Many people don't give a damn about anyone but themselves. I blame social media leaving many lacking in social skills and emotional intelligence.

It's not you Op for sure. You've been through a lot and the least you can expect is for your so called friends to be there for you in your time of need.

A lot of people fall into the flakey and self-obsessed category!

Op take care of yourself and if you feel low do ring the Samaritans and have a good moan. You said you are doing therapy and that’s great and it will take time to help you recover. It’s a horrible rainy day but if you feel like it tomorrow send a few texts and maybe your friends will surprise you by being better than you think