Bf refusing to take care of our cat

[Jellyfishy20]

This year has been hard as I’ve been diagnosed with pcos and sleep apnea and also lost three family members in the space of three months so my mum booked a family holiday for a week in Spain. I have recently adopted a stray kitten with my boyfriend of three years, at first he didn’t want me to keep him but eventually fell in love with him. I’m due to fly to Spain next week and asked my boyfriend to take care of him whilst I’m away. At first he said he would but now he is being horrible to me saying he wished we never got him, how I’m abandoning him and the cat, he’s never doing another favour for me again, I have to pay for both of them when I’m away (I was going to put money towards food just as I always do each week) and it’s just making me feel sad because I want to enjoy the last couple of days and if he asked me to look after his family’s pet I happily would. My cat is too young to be put in a cattery and I feel like it would be too stressful and I don’t have anybody else to watch him. AIBU for expecting my boyfriend to look after our pet? He keeps saying he’s not going to do it but I fly away on Tuesday so I have no other option.

• Go on Airtasker (or similar) and find someone local to make sure the cat is fed and watered every day. It shouldn’t cost that much (possibly less than bulk buying food for your POS DP).
• Enjoy your holiday.
• Break up with this idiot when you get back.

100% this.

Years ago I knew of a young woman who was given a cat, {Kitten} - her boyfriend was jealous of the kitten, and threw the kitten down the stairs in a rage.

The kitten was found dead on her side of the bed a few days later.

NEVER leave a vulnerable animal with a boyfriend {or anyone} who isn't absolutely own board with loving and caring for that animal.

Rest in peace, Little Cat..I haven't forgotten what happened to you.

Edit: Friend left this awful man.

THIS would be my main concern.
See my other post where a vindictive boyfriend threw a tiny kitten down the stairs, and the cat was found deceased on her side of the bed a few days later.

Men can be very jealous of animals that woman love.

I'd not leave that little cat with him. No way.

''My family hate him hence why he wasn’t invited.''

Families are often very perceptive.

They probably hate him for a very good reason.

Believe them.

I wouldnt leave him with the cat, but i would leave him.

I agree with the two comments above.
I really wouldn't trust him with the kitten either.
He sounds worse with every post you make.

Dont enter into any arguments with him about the food payments/kitten before you go away.
Ask the vet to recommend a cat sitter and quietly take the cat there without discussing it.

He sounds really jealous that you are going on holiday and is acting out because of it. He doesn't sound like a caring partner at all. If you have any really special items at home, make sure you take them to your mum's before going on holiday just in case.

Use your holiday to think about whether you want to continue living with someone who treats you like this and how you can move on from them. It sounds like your family would support you in this

His attempts to sabotage your holiday are abusive.
Therefore your cat is not safe with him.
And neither are you.

I was going to say “get a cat sitter who will come to the house” but am now thinking it won’t be safe to leave the cat with him. Is she too young for a cattery because she’s not had her jabs?

He's an awful human being. Your family is right about him. Get rid.

Maybe your family is right about him

Sure op said they have had the cat four months so should be fully vaccinated some catteries won’t take cats under 6 months though.

uts irrelevant whether she adopted or found it or doesn’t help the situation. he’s being an idiot and that’s all that is too it.

OP he sounds like an unsupportive idiot

I think you mean 'dumping him when you get back'

Do you have a friend or neighbour who could help with the cat?

Could you pay someone to pop round when that arse your soon-to-be-ex is out?

I only asked because going out and adopting a cat from a rescue would be a very joint decision where he actually agreed to take in and own said cat.

Finding a poor mite and taking it in is very much. Look I found this, I’m keeping it.

Already since established his a twat in many ways.

I also hope it's your house he's living in, because you'll be able to get him out

I don't say this often, but why are you even with this guy? Sooo many red flags!

OP, he's a cocklodger who's using you. He doesn't want to look after the cat because he's angry you're having a holiday without him.

Go on Facebook and find a pet sitter who will come to your house, will probably be cheaper than this freeloader

Use Pawshake to find a cat sitter and please please dump this horrible awful wanker. You’d have to be beyond horrible to not want to help the person you love out. It’s hardly onerous anyway.

Why limit it to refusing to do favours for him? Why not take the chance to get him out of your life? The very fact that he expects you to pay for his food while you are away should be enough reason even without the whole cat issue.

My family hate him

I don't even know him and I hate him as well. What a nasty piece of shit. I hope your health recovers soon - getting rid of this toxic arsehole will help.

Just do not have children with him. He is an immature arse.

This isn't about the cat. This is about not being invited on holiday with you. He's stropping.

I think if you can't find someone to take the kitten you'll either have to take the risk and hope he won't punish you through the cat or not go. I think I'd be telling him to sling his hook either way. Selfish fucker

After this I won’t be asking him for favours and won’t be doing any favours for him either.

What's the point in being with someone if that's what your future holds.

I'd be inclined to see if a cattery would take the cat for the duration of your holiday and once back ask your DBF to move out or find a new home for yourself and the cat.

Get rid

I would find someone who can take the cat for a week. A friend maybe? As long as they keep the cat inside it will be fine.

I would then tell him that you’ve made arrangements for the cat, so that will give him ample opportunity to move out while you’re away, and you expect him to not be there when you get back.