Is it possible to live on 1700 per month in these circumstances?

[Siskosisko]

... after mortgage has been paid. All other bills (utilities, food etc) will have to come out of that 1700. Facing a difficult situation due to job losses (both me and DH as the same time) as one of the children is very ill and need a lot of time off. Other DC is severely disabled and issues with school etc. So a lot going on and starting a new job not realistic for either of us due to both DC having such high needs and DC2 being in crisis. Current (flexible) employers even had enough so cannot see how someone else would take us on.

We do have saving as we always worked, so no UC.

I haven't slept for a few days as I am so worried about finances. DC are 15 and 17.

I don't blame you for being worried. We had not far off that in savings - new boiler and new roof and we're down to £5k in savings with little opportunity to rebuild them (except for my redundancy payout, I'm hoping I find a new job asap so that could increase our savings, but I also know I'll be looking for a unicorn. Frankly I don't know if I could maintain a 9-5 in an office job just from the sleep deprivation and disrupted nights, so don't know what will happen if that's what I end up with. Can't work evenings as that would screw up the bedtime routine and sleep is such a big issue for DS.)

Is your car insurance very high OP or are you running two cars?

Mine is £10 a month so £50 a month stands out to me as a lot more.

We pay roughly 600 per month. 15 year no claims discount. I always shop around. I spoke to a few colleagues last year as our quote went up and everyone is paying similar. Its an almost 17 year old vauxhall... I cannot imagine to get car insurance for a tenner per month. mind, if the jobs go and we do not find something alternative quickly, it's probably cheaper to get rid of the car altogether anyways. we have semi decent public transport. We couldn't get to our offices (DH has a company car atm) with public transport but that won't be an issue anymore then. I didn't have a car pre kids so know I will cope.

What rates of PIP do your children get?
My son gets HRM, DLA,and we have a mobility car for him
Which we use as the family car.

DC1 is on high rate mobility but with everything going down south financially, we will need the mobility component in cash to pay bills.

Also, I predominantly need it for DC2. 2-3 hospital appointments and school runs as the taxi has been stopped for DC2 (after they escaped from the taxi and absconded). I spoke to the Motobiliy peeps and was told I am only allowed to use the car for DC1 or their benefit. so commuting to work or shopping would be ok but driving DC2 to school and appointments apparently is absolutely not within the rules. So that put me off too. They said the sometimes do investigate this in cases of accidents so it may come out (before anyone says 'how would they know?').

I'm in my 50s which I think makes car insurance cheaper for me. Do you use a comparison site every year to find the best deal OP? As there is a huge difference between what you are paying and what I am paying. I even have some extras on my policy like legal, key cover etc

driving DC2 to school and appointments apparently is absolutely not within the rules.

It can be within the rules. Driving DC2 to school and appointments benefits DC1. It means you can be around for DC1 more because it takes less time/is less rigid than public transport. Because it takes less time and you don’t have to wait for set public transport times, it also means you can rescue DC1 quicker should things go wrong for him - for example, you wouldn’t have to get the bus from the hospital to home to pick the car up to rescue DC1 from somewhere in the opposite direction. It support the running of the home which benefits DC1.

Also, if you want DC2 to return to school transport. Push for suitable provision to be provided. You do not have to take DC2. If you want to take DC2 push for mileage.

I think it would be a struggle tbh. The only thing you can do is ensure that relevant benefits are being claimed and look at where you can cutback.

You can use it as a,family car they expect you too so you can take your younger child to their appointments, in it ,they don't expect you traipse around on public transport when you have a car ,the car helps you to be more flexible which ultimately benefits DC1

Do you get a disability discount for your council tax? It's something we didn't even know about until we had a lift installed etc

They may be entitled to a small education bursary if you family income drops below 25k, won't be loads but every little helps in these situations.

My partner and I have had to take lower paid WFH jobs to meet the needs of kids with SEND and mental health struggles. It's so hard. I hope you and DH are ok yourselves

well, that's not what they told me. I was told explicitly I must not use it to only drive DC2 around. Ultimately, it doesn't matter as we need the money for bills and there is no way atm to trade that for a car.

no, DC is under 18 and two non disabled parents in the house. No discount in these circumstances. it would save quite a bit as our council tax bands are so high.

Our disabled dc is 11 and we are non disabled parents.... wonder if it varies from city to city then?

If your employer is restructuring can you not be made redundant, so that you will get a redundancy payment based on your years of service? At least ask your managers and HR about including you in those to be made redundant.

As far as other sources to boost your income, your circumstances would seem to allow you or your husband to do occasional or irregular work, for example, temporary staff to cover one-off events or seasons; filling in gaps as a 'bank' worker / holiday relief or taking a no-guaranteed hours contract.

This is our criteria,

The band reduction for households who need an extra bathroom, kitchen or other room for a disabled person &/or extra space inside the property for using a wheelchair is not only for when the disabled person is 18+. It can be for any age. But it doesn’t sound like it applies to your household.

The carer disregard when parents are caring for their own disabled DC can’t be put in place until their DC are 18. That is separate to the band reduction.

I will be made redundant but I have been in low paid part time work. My redundancy payments will be in the region of 3.5k. I appreciate it's better than nothing but it's not a live changing amount when you are in my situation. I hope I can cling on until the start the process but I worry they may let me go before as I need far too much time off at the moment due to going from crisis to crisis with DC2. But sticking around until I am made redundant is plan A.

DH has announced he is burned out and he will not return to work and said it's my turn (he worked full time and I part time since having DC). He isn't very well, really not coping. I can fully understand him. I just don't know how I will fit a new job in with all the appointments etc. But I think ultimately, I will have to find something. I am really exhausted. GP said it sounds like burn out which is possible. I just find it really hard ATM to think clearly and make a clear plan ahead. I am just going with the flow.

Op, sounds a really stressful situation for you.
I'm a longtime YNAB software user (over a decade) and it's a game changer for those expenses that happen yearly or longer term. Maybe give the free trial a go to map out expenses?
Is it worth buying a new car sooner rather than later?

I just checked the website. It says if there are at least 2 non disabled adults in the house, the discount doesn't apply. Sounds like it's something which is only paid if there is only one adult without extra needs.

We don't have a wheelchair user, or are in need of an extra room etc.

The band reduction is not based on who else is in the household. As I posted, it doesn’t sound like this applies to you.

However, you are mistaken about the carer disregard. The carer disregard is based on who else is in the household. But it would apply to your situation when DC1 is 18. For example, you as carer for DC1 would be disregarded. DH who would be eligible to pay council tax. DC1 disregarded as in full-time education. DC2 exempt as a child. This would mean there is only one adult eligible to pay council tax (DH), so you would get a 25% discount. See this page and the example. on it.

Once DC1 is no longer in full-time education, there would be 2 adults eligible to pay council tax (DH and DC1) so the 25% discount wouldn’t apply. That is unless DC1 is classed as Severely Mentally Impaired (SMI), which would see him exempt even if not in full-time education,

Can DH take some sick leave? If he isn’t mentally well enough to work, he could look at New Style ESA.

He is in the process of being dismissed. He says he just needs a proper time out. He just will claim carers allowance and he has no plans to return to work. Fair enough. He has always worked full time. He will not entertain anything else. There is no point discussing it further.

If eligible, New Style ESA would be more than carer’s allowance. It’s all well DH saying he won’t discuss it further or entertain anything else but you still need to discuss finances.

he just will claim carers. I cannot get him to do anything else. there is no chance.