Have you made sexual innuendos in the work place?

[LucieChardon]

So the BBC reported that GregG said: "In over 20 years of television, can you imagine how many women, female contestants on MasterChef, have made sexual remarks or sexual innuendo - can you imagine?"

Implying that many women also make sexual remarks or innuendos, in a professional environment. (His whole statement is doubling down that he's an obscene misogynist.)

I'm curious to know how true this is. I mean, with my own DH, joking with close friends, I might make a pun or a joke. Never with acquaintances, never with colleagues. What about you?

I find it hard to believe that there are many women who behave very differently from me. I think women are socialised to be generally less sexually aggressive.

YABU = I do make sexual remarks in the work place
YANBU = I do not make sexual remarks in the work place

"Banter". It seems to be all about the context and the people you work with. Obvious really.

I don't think every woman is the same as me, and I am surprised by the number of responses who do indulge in "banter" though. But it seems we're all fairly clued up on where the line is drawn, in our own circumstances.

Which is part of the problem with GW and others like him, that they either don't know where the line is drawn or deliberately cross that line to get a kick out of making others feel uncomfortable.

Absolutely agree with posters saying it's the security of being middle aged that empowers women to speak out. I'm fairly certain when I was in my 20s and in more junior positions that I did not speak out when higher-ups at work made inappropriate remarks.

Does telling a colleague they smell good/nice count? Something like oh that blue really suits you? Then probably yeah.

Also caught the eye of a colleague over a good looking chap!

Very similar to the above. Even if someone was to take it too far people would be happy to call them out on it.

Bake Off is rife and well known for its innuendos. Even the latest series when they made Spotted Dick

And I work somewhere where innuendo and cheeky comments come from both sexes rather rapidly. Never meant to be flirting (although it can be mock flirting with people we are comfortable with and who know it's not serious, once you've sussed them out). Just the kinda of humour amongst a, mostly young, workforce

My female colleagues do this, and talk openly about sex, far more than my male colleagues - I think its a lot riskier for men than it is women, these days.

I do sometimes, but not jokes aimed at people as such(well, not anymore, in my late teens/early 20s I would) and not until I knew my co-workers well enough to know they wouldn't be offended.

No, not really, and only with colleagues I was friends with, and socialised with outside work. Even then it would be along the lines of sniggering if someone said something that could be a double entendre, saying 'Oooh matron' or some such, rather than anything overtly sexual.

The only time it was a noticeable occurrence was with a female colleague who was constantly making sexual references, talking about her sex life and touching up male colleagues. Everyone felt very uncomfortable about it, and this was about 30 years ago. One male colleague was a particular target. (He was a middle aged guy and we were three younger women) and we encouraged him to take it higher up and said we would speak up for him but he didn't want to.

I do have friends who had the most creepy suggestive remarks made to them by men, but I have a very effective resting bitch face so managed to avoid it.

It's also important to distinguish between a dirty joke and a flirty comment with someone who has made it clear they don't want it or a come on or touching

I wouldn't class some of the experiences on here as innuendo

Yes, but this was 20 years ago and not in a corporate environment, this was retail, sales and catering and less formal amongst colleagues. It was more tongue and cheek and with well known colleagues. Some people did over step boundaries though, which I did report. One was a cleaner who asked me out and called me an ugly bitch when I declined, and another was a 60 something guy that I didn't work directly with who pushed his crotch against my arse (in view of customers too). I think that is very obviously intentionally overstepping boundaries and there was definitely no grey area there.

If a middle aged mam discussed his sex life I still would not have liked it 20 years ago. I wouldn't have complained back then, but I wouldhave thought he was a creep. It is definitely unprofessional.

No but I've heard and experienced many. The things some men say, especially if out overnight at a conference, and in the presence of a male colleague. I'm from the generation that learned to just tell them to grow up. It doesn't mean it was acceptable to us.; it was the best we could get in the 1980s-2000s . Nobody amongst senior staff did anything about it, even if they disapproved.

I voted YABU, as I did make innuendos. I was the only woman in an all male team (hospital porters), and when I was in a mostly women team (cleaners), most of them made filthy jokes a lot of the time.
We all knew our audience though.

I haven't, but some of my female colleagues regularly made such jokes to our very few male colleagues, and would sit on their knees, etc

If I was still working, nowadays I'd be cautioning then against it rather than just rolling my eyes inwardly. I know my line manager was unhappy with it, but I don't know if she ever said anything to them..

Greg Wallace probably thought he did, too.
(That is not a defence of him though)

If women don't want men to make innuendos to them at work, then they shouldn't be doing the same to men..

The women I worked with were pure filth. When I started working there, on my second day, I was hauled into the office and questioned about not joining in the banter.

I have to be honest and say I have. But I felt at the time I knew my audience and we were basically mates who were as young and silly as each other . But looking back it
Was probably inappropriate.

I'm genuinely curious to know roughly how old you are and what sectors you've worked in. I'm mid 40s, and have been working full time since I was sixteen. Everything was different at different stages of the past, and I've heard many a thing from a woman that made me clutch my pearls, whether that be a comment that was sexual, racial, or in some way "phobic".

I remember clearly in the late 1990s a delivery driver telling a filthy (and in my opinion, to this very day, hilarious) joke to my much older female coworkers, about "that dress" in relation to a scandal involving a certain former President of the USA, and they screamed laughing. We all did. He left the shop having amused us all, and further cemented his friendship with the staff. If it happened today, he'd have been sacked and we'd all have been interviewed by HR.

I have to say, until Mr Wallace released his statement, I was very much on the fence about whether or not he had been the person he's being accused of being...as it stands, to my mind I think he's proven he is all that's being said, however, I still couldn't care less either way, and like a lot of things, unless you were there to witness it, it's impossible to know what was said & how it was meant.

And let's face it, TV used to be full of innuendo and double-entendre - it was what practically all sitcoms pivoted on, and I'm not just talking about shows from the 1970's, because there's a great many post year 2000 (particularly before 2010) that were outrageous, so for all we know Gregg Wallace could have been encouraged to behave as he did (though I suspect he needed no encouragement at all).

Accidental innuendo yes occasionally, although I wouldn’t realise till afterwards when work mates were giggling away.

Yeah same here.

Yes I have

Bake Off, is just nonstop boring sexual innuendo. My assumption is the intent and focus was different with Gregg.

No because it's fucking gross.

I wonder if there's a North/South divide as up in the North East 'banter' including innuendos is fairly common.

However having your dick out like Gregg or feeling someone's arse is not!

It really depends on the workplace and the environment. I have never experienced unwanted sexual remarks towards me just adults joking about sex. I've worked in prisons, many hospitals, third sector organisations, in the community, research labs, I'm sure there's others!

However, my current work environment I would never do this and would be surprised if anything sexual come up. This is largely down to the type of work we do where it would be totally inappropriate and would cross boundaries for the type of work I do. However after saying that, there was a Freudian slip the other day in a workshop and we just laughed about it and moved on. It is a predominant female environment so I think this also impacts whats discussed.

There's a huge difference between a double entendre like on Great British Bake Off and the sort of thing Gregg Wallace is accused of.
I'm not going to feel threatened if someone says 'soggy bottom' I am if they whip their penis out at work.

We had training on it and I thought it was pretty sensible in terms of not being all pearl clutchy and acknowledging that there can be grey areas, while also getting across that if someone doesn't like a grey area joke you cut it out.