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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

....in thinking that 9 is too young for a mobile phone?

100 replies

zog · 29/04/2008 10:27

DS is 9 and has announced this morning having had a flick through the Argos catalogue that he has enough money for a mobile phone.

I explained to him that it's not just a case of buying the phone, he would have to have enough money for calls as well (which he doesn't).

He could only cite one other child that he knows who has one, so it's not a case of peer pressure.

My main objections are:

theft magnet
DS can't even look after a watch successfully
a lot of money
access to info/texts unsuitable for his age

I have said that we will have a (not flashy) "family" mobile that he can take with him when he's out and about by himself and we will look at the issue again when he goes to secondary school. But he is saying it's his money and he has the right to spend it on what he wants.

So AIBU? What have you done/decided re mobiles?

OP posts:

Squirdle · 29/04/2008 18:35

And the amount of children who have their own laptops now astonishes me! DS1 shares my laptop when he needs to. I know a 6 year old who has her own laptop!

StarlightMcKenzie · 29/04/2008 18:40

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pointydog · 29/04/2008 18:55

Mobile phones are pretty cheap, starlight.

pointydog · 29/04/2008 18:57

Actually, I don't think there was anything that my parents refused me on idealogical grounds. I was refused things because there wasn't money but that's different.

The dds are do not use their phones very often. Days go by when they don't use them, then a little flurry of sociable activity.

K999 · 29/04/2008 18:59

My dd is 8 and has her own phone and lap-top. I am the parent and therefore I monitor what she is doing. tbh she lost interest in the phone when she realised that she would have to pay for credit and the lap-top is strictly supervised. Its the 21st century and I dont see the problem with these things tbh...

Joash · 29/04/2008 19:00

far too young - no reason why a nine-year-old should need one.

LoopyLena · 29/04/2008 19:02

Laptops and mobiles at 8...

Whatever happened to teddy bears and Barbie dolls?????

Kids are growing up far too soon these days.

pointydog · 29/04/2008 19:03

dd2 loves her teddies and polly pockets as well, lena. The two types of toy are not mutually exclusive.

StarlightMcKenzie · 29/04/2008 19:05

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Message withdrawn

LoopyLena · 29/04/2008 19:21

Sorry, didn't mean to sound offensive, I was just saying that I think mobile phones and laptops are not for 8 year old children, my 8yr old occassionally uses the family computer but he has no need for his own laptop or mobile phone, he plays games on a Nintendo DS and he is never far away from a landline. It's just my opinion, no offense intended.

qtsam · 29/04/2008 19:23

I was just reading the post which interested me as my 10 yr old just had a fairly cheap one for his birthday and we had had a good think before doing it.

I think it was be HANDY when he is out playing and I need him home but its every day technology and he is having fun taking silly pictures, recording his friends and texting his friends. He pays his own credit so is learning money management too.

I grew up with 4 TV channels, basic pacman, and very little else but we dont live in 1982 now so have thoroughly enjoyed progression to laptops, PSP's, DS's, Digital TV and DAB its all just moving forward and not living in the past I feel. There is so much more to explore and enjoy.

A phone at 10 is nothing when you think about the world they now live in.

K999 · 29/04/2008 19:24

dd2 likes cuddlies and dolls etc too but is growing out of a lot of toys....she likes the computer and is very IT literate which is a good thing imo....however most of the sites she goes on are centred round dressing dolls up! i suppose its the 21st version of dolls these days!

pointydog · 29/04/2008 19:26

I didn't take offence, lena, s'ok.

LoopyLena · 29/04/2008 19:53

LoopyLena · 29/04/2008 19:55

Yeh, but wasn't basic Pac-Man cool!!!!

qtsam · 29/04/2008 20:13

Yes all my friends came round to use my basic pacman that had to be plugged into the mains to work!!!!

My personal opinion is 9 is too young but 10 is ok. 10 is like a milestone anyway and for my son we changed a few bits that he is allowed to do or is required to do now he is in double figures but he is still a child and carefully supervised.

DoubleBluff · 29/04/2008 20:20

DS2 is 8. he has my old mobile with a new sim card in it that cost me ten pounds (PAYG).
He doesn't 'need ' it as such, but a few friends of his have one and they text each other - very occasionally.
He went to a 'sllepover' on the weekend andtexted me 'gooodnightMum, I love you.'
I was touched.
he plays games on it and takes photos and generally thinks he is cool.
HE doesn't take it to school or out to play.
It is generally a waste of time!
BUT he is old enough to use it if he wants to. So shoot me down!!

LoopyLena · 29/04/2008 21:10

Personally, I think it all depends very much on how much they are using it.

Me and DH were devestated when step-dd's mum bought her one at 8 years old.

She is now 15 and it's never off or out of her hand! She even texts me sometimes from the classroom because she is bored!!! I don't text her back until I know school's finished. When she stays with us we have to prompt her to have a break from it, she even sleeps with it near her head!

I'm amazed she hasn't got RSI in her thumbs, the speed she texts! As for Brain fry...

She has already had 7 years of mobile phone microwaves constantly at her head! She seems to be in a peer group where they just can't live without one...and it has to be the latest model!!! She was devestated when it had to go off for repair and she had to use last years model!!! Strangely, every phone she has had breaks down and has to be sent away...she's quite literally wearing them out!!!

I think this is why I am even more against my 8 yr old DS having one. I don't want him ending up a mobile 'addict' like his step-sis!

If you are strict with how much they are using it and it's not constantly on next to their heads then I guess it's not too bad.

chefswife · 29/04/2008 21:32

When I was fifteen, I too slept with the phone nearby. I remember in the early ?80?s the topic was getting your children their own line; the phone would ring differently. I had my own line and I had to pay for it. Not really any different than having a mobile.

I say, let him get the phone but make it absolutely clear he is the only one that will put forth any money towards any cost that accompanies ownership of a phone. He will soon understand that purchasing some objects requires much more responsibility then the initial purchase. The things is, is that you can ring him and he will be able to ring 999 and make collect calls to you without a balance on the line. It won?t take long for him to realize that he may have spent his money on something more useful to him. Or perhaps you have just created a very motivational individual.

LoopyLena · 29/04/2008 21:50

The difference is you had a landline that does not emit microwaves through your brain.

Keeping a mobile permanently by your head is a health risk.

"...There is a growing and statistically significant body of evidence reporting that brain tumours such as vestibular schwannoma (acoustic neuroma) and astrocytoma are associated with 'heavy' and 'prolonged' mobile-phone use, particularly on the same side as the 'preferred ear' for telephony.

"It is anticipated that this danger has far broader public health ramifications than asbestos and smoking, and directly concerns all of us, particularly the younger generation, including very young children."

This is an extract from a report written this month.

Quattrocento · 29/04/2008 21:55

DD had one when she was 9 (she is now 10) and it is her most treasured possession

We insisted on pay as you go so that she could pay for the calls out of her pocket money

All her friends have mobiles and they spend their lives texting one another, bluetoothing and exchanging music. They never actually make calls as far as I can see

Apart from the time they spend on msn and fb of course

Are you being unreasonable? No in principle but it is the way of the world

wannaBe · 29/04/2008 22:04

"Mobile phones are not purely about keeping
safe and contacting parents.". What else are they for then? taking pictures? ah you can get cameras to do that, listening to music? try buying an mp3 player, talking to their friends? well most people have a landline at home don't they?

No we didn't have mobiles when we were growing up, but equally I don't think any of my friends were allowed their own landline in their bedroom, and that amounts to the same thing surely?

wannaBe · 29/04/2008 22:06

also, all this texting is just encouraging our children to grow up without the ability to communicate properly. They do it all with txt spk. They have conversations via text instead of actually speaking to each other. very sad if you ask me.

cat64 · 29/04/2008 22:09

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mumeeee · 29/04/2008 22:13

YANBU. A nine year old does not need a mobile phone. The rule in our house was that they had to be 16 before they had a mobile. They managed fine without one until then.

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