Sister being a bitch because I have the flu

[RedPineapplePanda]

I normally pick my nephews up from school a couple of times a week. Until recently I had a car and would get them then take them back home (too far for me to walk and crossing a busy duel carriageway)

Had to scrap my car and have occasionally walked to the school to get them - it's about a two mile round trip.

I came down the the flu (actual flu, not a cold - popped on a flu/Covid test) on Sat and have been feeling absolutely awful since. I've barely been out of bed!

She's was awful to me yesterday because I couldn't get them and has been nasty today too. Basically she thinks I'm putting on being ill or being soft/dramatic because she's had a cold and has still been going to work. I also have a chronic illness that makes me feel unwell so the flu on top has just made everything ten times worse.

Our mom is giving me a lift to the school tonight but aibu to tell sister to pack the attitude in?

Put her in her place she had kids she looks after them.
No ever asks me to baby sit because they know what i will say fuck off their not mine flat out no.

If she's on UC she will be able to claim the childcare element which is up to 85% she needs to look at a childminder.....if she's not on UC she can get the tax free and save 20%.

Maybe the sister can do that walk then to get the steps in so OP can stay in bed and rest with the flu!

I bet everyone is stressed to their eyeballs.

I feel bad for her with a feckless ex
I feel sorry for you as you are feeling ill and she's acting all entitled.

I think she needs to pay for the childcare.

Thread #12,475,881 on MN of a grown adult not taking responsibility for themselves or their choices, specifically to have children with a waster and then expecting others to suffer the consequences of their actions under the guise of “but we’re faaaaaaamily”. Nothing changes.

I was going to post that you should wait until you are better before talking to her about this but I think you should see her tonight and breathe all over the ungrateful baggage.

Then who looks after the children if the catch flu from you.

I'd be telling her to fuck right off and to find alternative arrangements going forward.

Cheeky cow.

Your sister is trying repeatedly to dump her problems into your arms and the only solution is to fold your arms tightly and walk away. Sure you may be very glad to help her out sometimes, but this is her child and her partner's (or ex's) and they are the ones who need to leave work early if arrangements fall through, even if this is very undesirable because of being on probation/whatever the dad's excuse is.

She’s treating you like this because you allow it.

She needs you more than you need her.
You are doing her a huge favour and it’s time she recognises that and appreciates it.

Can I assume that you nor your mum work and she somehow thinks she’s superior because she does?

They are her kids.
If she needs childcare then she’ll need to get a childminder like everyone else does.

Tell her to sort something else out because you’re not going to be accused of lying when you’re doing her such a huge favour.

She needs to apologise and sort her attitude out before you agree to do it again.

Raise your own children springs to mind!
tell her to leave you alone unless she’s coming grovelling with flowers and an apology.
Longer term you need to ditch this arrangement, your efforts are not valued

She is being a CF but quite apart from that did she not consider the fact that maybe someday/one day you might be incapacitated and she would have to make alternative plans?

I did work until recently when I was made redundant. Mom doesn't work because she's disabled and retired a few years ago

Sister was out of work until the summer and got this job.

She needed to organise formal childcare when she got a job, like everyone else does. You not working doesn’t mean to slide in to help her, especially when she’s rude and thankless.

Like fuck I’d be doing any more favours for someone with that attitude!

I assume you'll be going back to work at some other by then so she's going to have to work it out.

Not your kids, not your problem. You have communicated to your sister that you are too ill to pick the kids up. It's HER problem to make other suitable arrangements not yours. Go back to bed and stop worrying about it. And to be honest, plenty of people aren't lucky enough to have family members to help out. It's highly unlikely that a sick childminder will arrange cover for the children (nor should they). I've been a parent for nearly 12 years, and I won't lie, sometimes it's really tough, but it was my choice, and however much we have great family, friends, we are responsible for our kids 24/7 no one else is.

How did it come about that this was your responsibility?

She is a massive CF.

This is a her problem not a you
problem. She needs to sort out reliable childcare and you can be the emergency back up.

This exact scenario is why you should be your sisters emergency backup, not her primary childcare. You have the flu and have no business caring for her kids right now. You need to rest and you could easily get her children sick. Your sister will miss much more than a couple of hours of work if that happens.