Sister being a bitch because I have the flu

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I normally pick my nephews up from school a couple of times a week. Until recently I had a car and would get them then take them back home (too far for me to walk and crossing a busy duel carriageway)

Had to scrap my car and have occasionally walked to the school to get them - it's about a two mile round trip.

I came down the the flu (actual flu, not a cold - popped on a flu/Covid test) on Sat and have been feeling absolutely awful since. I've barely been out of bed!

She's was awful to me yesterday because I couldn't get them and has been nasty today too. Basically she thinks I'm putting on being ill or being soft/dramatic because she's had a cold and has still been going to work. I also have a chronic illness that makes me feel unwell so the flu on top has just made everything ten times worse.

Our mom is giving me a lift to the school tonight but aibu to tell sister to pack the attitude in?

It's a pre surgery assessment and she's been waiting months for it.

Okay, so you've done it this time, but I really do think you need to put some boundaries in place with your sister. She's obviously taking you for granted, despite all you do for her. What happens next time you're sick or have an appointment? She really needs to get some childcare sorted. She might appreciate what you've been doing more when she has to pay someone else to do it!

Your DS needs to leave work to get her own DC. I’d stop this all immediately, tbh. They are her issue to sort. She’s an ungrateful cow. It’s not your fault their dad isn’t involved.

She needs to pay for childcare like everyone else. Doesn’t matter she’s a single parent.

Tell her to start paying someone for professional childcare.

She also says she has another chronic illness

Unfortunately for your sister this Is the reality of relying on family for informal and unpaid childcare. If she wants reliable childcare she needs to organise and pay for it.
You have done her a huge favour and she’s taken the piss, I think the arrangement has come to an end

Your sister is absolutely taking the piss.

If she had a paid childminder she wouldn't get away with this shitty behaviour.

My initial reaction is to tell her to shove it. Being kind, I might give her 2 weeks notice to arrange childcare. Tell her it will permanently damage your relationship to keep this arrangement.

She needs to pay for after school club.

have you ever had flu?

You're missing the point entirely

Did you miss the part where she said she has a chronic illness and has to cross a dual carriage way a 2 mile walk might be easy for you but you don’t know how difficult that is for op. Good on you for completely missing the point.

It's Mumsnet. People always have to virtue signal about how healthy and active they are, even when there is absolutely no reason for it!

Yes, they aren't together anymore.

The after school club finishes at 4pm so isn't much help!

It only runs until 4pm.

Then she needs to find and pay for an alternative provision, like a childminder, again - like everyone else does! Most working couples are not around for 4pm collections either.

Yep.

We're going to have a chat tonight because I'm totally fucking sick of her attitude.

Good OP. Be very firm with her. She needs to pay for childcare like every other working person does.

It’s not your problem!

I've had flu so bad I could hardly walk. I could lay in bed and write texts etc though. In between bouts of sleeping and sweating

I've had flu once in my life and I couldn't even lift my head off the pillow, DH had to carry me to the toilet. You've probably got a very bad cold.
However, you really should be resting and not spreading your germs to your sister:s DC.
Your sister is dreadful expecting you to look after them,. I'd put my foot down.
Does she do massive favours for you in a reciprocal fashion?
Get well soon 💐

You are 'supposed' to walk 10,000 thanks to a marketing campaign by a Japanese pedometer company. Just like you are 'supposed' to spend a month's wages on an engagement ring, that is 'supposed' to be a diamond, because of a De Beers campaign.
Walking is good for you but the mythical 10k figure was pulled out of a marketers ass!

If I had a sister like you, OP, I would be worshipping at your feet. I would be so grateful for your help that you'd probably be cringing at my expressed gratitude and you'd be in line for a very hefty Christmas present.

Contrary to most other posters, I don't think your sister is being unreasonable relying on you for some childcare if you are happy to provide it - times are tough, childcare is expensive and patchy, families stick together and it ultimately benefits your nephews if their mum is able to work and keep her job. The benefit to them may well outweigh the inconvenience to you and you may be willing to help for this reason.

But, like you said, her attitude stinks. You're doing her a favour. She's not entitled to your help and she shouldn't be making you feel bad because you're ill and unable to provide it for once. She's the one who needs to have back-up plans in place and, ultimately, will need to leave work early if there is no other solution.

She’s sounds like a right bitch. Some childminders do school pick up, I suggest she looks into this. What happens if you are not available?

your sisters position is difficult but it's not your problem , she needs to get a childminder . It's been nice of you to do it up until now but it isn't feasible for you to continue doing it. Their father sounds like a dick .

You’re obviously lovely and won’t do it but your dsis completely deserves to lose your support. You’re not a robot and she’s bang out of order making it anyone else’s problem.

i completely get that she’s concerned for her job and is trying to be everything to everyone but frankly this is all her problem, no one else’s. She needs to find a job that does give her the flexibility she needs with school age children. It’s hard but it’s not impossible as the thousands of parents in exactly the same position evidence every single day. She clearly doesn’t appreciate the support she does have and harshly I’m inclined to say she doesn’t deserve it.

Our disabled mom and dad do the pick up.