Who was in the wrong - bakery or me?

[Doijb]

I take my kids to a bakery after swimming. Most of the time they choose sausage rolls or similar. There is a tiny table with two chairs. I plop one of my kids on my lap and we eat our treat. I prefer this as otherwise the flakes would go everywhere.

Anyway, after going every week to this place for a year one of the staff members tells me we’re not really a sit down food place. I inquire about the chairs and she said it’s more for people who wait.

I just found this odd. My kids are brilliantly behaved and I make sure not loud. My oldest will wipe down the table with a serviette.

Who is being weird?

Chairs and table = ambiguity, in my opinion. YANBU.

Have a little think and I'm sure you will get there eventually.

But if the staff believed the same as OP about said dining table, and have now been made aware that it is indeed what seems to be a decoration rather than functional for use, it's not really that weird they didn't say anything, because there wasn't anything to say as far as they were concerned.

And if owners/management who should know about these rules didn't know it was happening, also not weird that they wouldn't say anything, because again, nothing to say anything about as far as they were concerned.

There really isn't some huge conspiracy here to embarrass and humiliate customers, it's just a misunderstanding that's been corrected. Because you know, where humans are involved, sometimes these things happen.

No it’s this part of your post I was referring to
“OP sounds like she was already familiar with the rules anyway, considering she admitted she would move if a disabled person was waiting.”

She was being polite

But it wasn't a priority seat! JFC

Guess they’ve just lost a regular customer then!

There’s really no other purpose for a table and chair other than to sit at, just seems that the bakery owner had a different expectation as to how it should be used than OP. Maybe the owner should have put a sign saying ‘only for waiting customers’. I’m assuming OP has never been asked to move for an elderly or disabled customer? Seems a non issue to me and it doesn’t take that long to eat a sausage roll so I don’t think OP has done anything wrong at all

I didn’t say it was….? I said she’s been told it’s not for people to sit and eat at, it’s for people waiting, people who may have requirements more important than OP. Now she knows she shouldn’t sit there. She can’t plead ignorance (which may have been true originally) now that she knows for a fact that she shouldn’t sit there.

Not everything has to be a big drama.

This is AIBU on MN! I rest my case.

You said she shouldn't sit on a (non-priority) chair in case a disabled person needed it but didn't want to/ couldn't ask.

I asked if this was your own approach - i.e. did you never sit down in a public space in case a disabled person needed it but didn't want to/ couldn't ask.

You then said you would only not sit in case it was needed if it was a priority seat. If you know that the seat we are talking about is not a priority seat then what was the relevance in you raising it!

it’s for people waiting, people who may have requirements more important than OP.

Priority tables?

There is a table …. Which is not for sitting. A table & chairs signals sit and eat.

Bakery should take table away.
Bakery can put a sign - we are not licensed for dining in. Chairs for customers who are waiting.

Is they leave the table, don’t hang a sign then people will sit.

It is likely the person at this bakery doesn’t like crumbs which is ironic …. bakery with no crumbs?

But… she hasn’t said she’s going to “plead ignorance”. You’re just making things up.

I know what I use tables for. But I admit I don't know your life, perhaps when you see your kitchen table you instinctually stand

I'm going to make the crumby bakery, crummy bakery observation - maybe somebody else can work it up into a better joke?

This

Nope. Someone said maybe it’s needed for people waiting who may have a disability. OP said she would have moved if someone was disabled. I said that not all disabilities are visible.

I said that now she knows she isn’t to sit there then she shouldn’t sit there. It’s that simple. She’s been told not to sit there- for whatever reason that is (I’m not saying it IS a priority seat)- but it is NOT for the OP and her kids to sit at. So she needs to not sit there.

You’ve completely missed my point. As for the priority seating comment of yours, on buses, trains, with toilets etc. no, I would not sit in these seats because I know that not all disabilities are visible and others needs may trump my own.

It's for the staff to put their ashtray and scotch glasses on during their breaks.

Or it hinges upwards to reveal a rocket launcher.

"mortified"

The presence of a table and chairs does imply it is there for customers to be able to sit at them.

Well the bakery said they were for people waiting. 🤷‍♀️

Why do they need a waiting area for sausage rolls anyway.

It's not a fish and chip bar or standard takeaway where you wait a while. Surely you go in, ask for your sausage roll, pay, walk away sit down and eat.

If they need a waiting area they must be superslow and therefore have other problems...

Until now- no one was weird as you didn’t know. Now you know so you have to decide- are you ok going and grabbing the food to go or go elsewhere.

Oh dear heavens! I also didn’t I say that! I’m saying she’s been told so she shouldn’t do it because she doesn’t have ignorance on her side anymore where she did this time.

It’s the table which is the controversial piece of furniture here, though. Elderly/disabled people might need to sit down, granted, but they don’t need a table. A table and chairs implies sitting down to eat.

How’s that any different?