Nasty disagreement over house purchase

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We are negotiating a house purchase and found a house we both like. We have been going back and forth with the seller over the past few weeks.

Our last offer was £555k which was rejected but the seller has said they will accept £558k. My husband wants to offer £556k and not a penny more. I think we should offer the full amount but my husband has refused and is adamant he won't offer more than £556k.

Am I being thick, it's £2k more and we get the house? My husband isn't moving and has called me a clown for saying "it's only £2k more."

prices have been amended to avoid outting

We had a viewer who criticised every single room in the house. He said it all needed decorating, he thought there had been a leak in the ceiling, he didn’t like the flooring and said the garden was a mess. Then he made an offer of £50K under the asking price.

The house was immaculate, the garden was landscaped, it had all been decorated in the last year, there had never been a leak and the agent described it as immaculate.

I wouldn’t have sold it to him, if he had been the only buyer in the land. Fortunately we had several other offers, that were much more realistic.

Some folk just want to try it on.

But surely at that point the EA terms and conditions kick in. If the EA introduces a buyer willing and able to pay the asking price, if the seller rejects they become liable to pay the EA fees whatever happens.

In his defence, he may only be trying to control the house buying process because OP seems to have made offers without consulting him - and it’s his money.

@DinosaurMunch
It will have been valued on the current condition though. Not on the updated version. So it's not grounds for haggling unless something unexpected comes up in survey.
The only thing that matters is what they will accept and what you will pay. They don't care about the justification
Exactly this. We refused "buyers" who fooled around and kept making offers because we didn't trust them

£2k is tiny in the scheme of things. Are you sure he really wants this house?

In cases like this where it’s stalemate and neither party will budge for fear of losing face, one side or other will back down but with a caveat, for example the seller could say ok to lower offer not but it’s binding so if work is identified at survey stage, we won’t be taking more money off. Or the buyer could say, ok to higher offer but you throw in range cooker/curtains or whatever.

Sorry to say, OP, that’s how we lost a flat we really loved, but husband wouldn’t budge on it.

As others have suggested - offer what they are asking for and no doubt the survey will show up anything you can use to justify negotiating downwards - as it stands - you have just got the sellers back up - DH has taken a very short sighted approach IMHO. When I bid the asking price for the house I live in now - the seller had already had an offer equalling the asking price. They or the EA asked us to bid again - we did - the other couple refused to bid and lost out on the house I've been in for 20 years. This is negotiation - if you genuinely want it - offer what you think is reasonable to seal the deal - unless you think the price they want is clearly (i.e. you can justifiably say it's over prices compared to similar houses in the a similar area - if in fact there are any to compare it with) don't go under without a justifiable reason just to screw the seller for £2k or a fraction of a percent - in 10 or 20 years time that £2k won't be a big deal will it? If you go ahead I wouldn't be surprised if you are for a rougher ride now. You take a risk of offering less than what they appear to want - but what is your plan when they stand their ground or even decide to bump you off if they think you are going to be a PITA - I did this to one of the people bidding on a property I was selling (when acting as an executor) - a "cash buyer" who needed to sell property from a portfolio to raise cash because the bank deemed him to have over extended himself and hence they wouldn't offer him the full mortgage he was asking for...)

I do however - agree with your husband - that you never give anything away to the EA or seller about your financial position or reason for buying or wanting to buy(or sell) (this goes for the buyer and the seller) or how much you want the property - EA's are in my experience completely untrustworthy and totally selfish - it's the true nature of real business - I have nothing but contempt for the parasites - they will sell a house at any price so long as they get their 1-2% - they don't act in the interests of the seller or the buyer - their business is based on turnover of property - they want as many houses through the books as possible per month - that's why they never support sellers thinking about relisting a property at a different price either because the market has moved quickly or possibly because of delays in the buying process due to the buyers having problems (which the EA are very reluctant to tell you about - they keep it under their hat for as long as possible) - they never want anyone to pull out and make the selling/buying process longer.

I'd question if your husband actually wanted the house?

Why not meet in middle and say £557 I don't think either party would want to lose out for a grand.

When we bought our house, we put in an offer and the Estate Agent told us they'd come back saying they needed £500 more. It was to do with their own house purchase and mortgage. Ironically we got a mortgage that was £50 less than we needed to cover the extra. Work made jokes about having a whip-round.

Sometimes people really need that extra bit to be able to complete their own purchase so 2K could be the difference between being able to accept or not.

All depends on if you are “ proceed able”
if you can go ahead without a huge chain etc
if not you are open to being side lined by other
offers.
what is the situation with vendors sale is there an on going purchase etc , if so is there a chain etc
the fact they they engaging with offers et cetera from you, points to the fact that they want and need a buyer
ie “ highly motivated sellers “
your DP is wanting to win but , it’s actually about the big picture

You don't say what the original asking price was so I can't tell if you and DH are driving a hard bargain or if the seller is being a weasel.

But I have observed over many years that odd things happen to our brains when we deal with house price sized numbers. 2K may be a small percentage but presumably it's more actual cash than you'd hand over with a shrug just because someone asked for it?

Both of you go back to the drawing board and decide what this house is worth to you. Then either stick to your price or back out and keep looking.

Btw. On the scale of things, this isn't an especially nasty disagreement. May you never encounter worse.

I got the impression the asking price was £558k as OP said in one of her updates that the £556k her DH wanted to offer was £2k below asking price.

A lot of chains are collapsing at the moment. It's just happened to us. It's a sign of an unstable housing market. You'd also know by seeing it on Rightmove as sold and then seeing it go back on the market.

The seller has now said he will accept £558K, but it isn't clear if this was the original asking price. He may have come down a fair bit already, or I suppose there could have been some gazumping going on, I don't know.

If you really want the house, then 2k when you're talking about more than half a million is nothing. If you have other houses in the pipeline that you like as much and can potentially get a better deal then fine. If not I'd just cough up the £2k. Within 3 months it'll be forgotten about...or you could still be looking for the 'perfect' house for the next 5 years!

Haggling over tiny fractions of a % in house buying is nonsense IMO.

That unfortunately is the kind of stuff you get when you deal with amateur negotiators.

A good deal is about both sides not being completely happy, but still being willing to do the transaction.

If I were the seller I would just walk away because it's probably a sign of someone being a pain to deal with.

Hi, it's usual to bid, but it depends how much the sellers are prepared to drop, if it's the house you really want £2000 is neither here nor there..good luck

typical male ego. Your husband wants to feel he has won and has made the negotiation about winning and bettering the other person. He has lost sight of the bigger picture. £2k more on a £500k+ house purchase is insignificant.

As someone that scrutinised finances, I would be say working out how much interest is paid on that £2k over the length of the mortgage (if there is one).

Use a calculator to work out the total repayment on both 556 and 558 to see what the difference would be and if it's worth it. £2k with a mortgage will definitely be more than £2k overall.

Everyone always forgets, in the context of house purchasing, that 2k is still £2000 of your money; in the context of a mortgage, thats £2000 plus 25yrs of interest. That's a luxury holiday for a family of 4. That's a cheap Rolex. That's a lot of money. If your hubby is playing hard ball, well, so are they, if its truly "only 2k". I think I agree with your hubby. Stick to your guns; if they want the sale and don't want to have to dick around waiting for another offer, they can drop a bit more, or at least work to meet you somewhere in the middle. You will find another house to buy, just as they'll find another buyer.

I agree with your husband. Why pay for a house more than it is worth, in this day and age. It is very hard for people to get a mortgage these thas you have leverage. I have always been told to see a house negotiation as a business transaction and not to get to attached.

If you think of 3k over 25 yrs then ita abs nothing and not worth losing a house over BUT same can be said of the vendor- to lose a purchaser over 3k seems a bit pathwtic eap when youre in the realms of half a million

I'm with your husband it sounds petty I know but I'd go back and say no problem 555 was our ceiling we will leave it they will think thier losing a sale over a few grand and maybe come back to you if it's meant to be. It works both ways they lose over a couple or you do I know I wouldn't budge personally if they want to sell they'll accept 🤷 best of luck