Nasty disagreement over house purchase

[Alittlebyte]

We are negotiating a house purchase and found a house we both like. We have been going back and forth with the seller over the past few weeks.

Our last offer was £555k which was rejected but the seller has said they will accept £558k. My husband wants to offer £556k and not a penny more. I think we should offer the full amount but my husband has refused and is adamant he won't offer more than £556k.

Am I being thick, it's £2k more and we get the house? My husband isn't moving and has called me a clown for saying "it's only £2k more."

prices have been amended to avoid outting

Is the market moving? How long has the house been on the market? Have they had other offers? Are other houses in the area accepting lower offers or dropping their asking prices to get offers?

If the answers indicate the house and others in the area aren't moving and it's been a while, I'd personally be tempted to say your last offer stands until you find something else as you are moving on with your search. I'd also have the EA once again point out all the modernising the house will require when someone does buy it, and that will be a factor in the price.

The market has though

By 3%

Unless the one buyer who 'loves it' walks off. In which case, who knows.

Its been on the market for a while. They'd accepted an offer in the summer but the chain broke down.

Rates have gone up slightly and things aren't moving as quickly as the summer.

Its been on the market for a while.
Gosh, what a surprise.

They'd accepted an offer in the summer but the chain broke down.
I wonder why. Perhaps the buyer realised they were paying too much, or perhaps the seller thought everything was overpriced.

I wouldn't be impressed with being called a clown, very rude.
He sound like a twat.

He’s rude as fuck. He’s playing the Big-I-Am and trying to pretend he’s a seasoned property buyer. He’s clearly not.

Valuable backstory. You are a clown.

The pair of you can't agree your purchase strategy (maximum bid from the off, or hold something back) and you have form for bidding on a joint purchase without consulting him.

id also wonder whether the offer thing was even true. We are moving at the moment and viewed a few houses that had been on the market for aaages, every single time the estate agent said the same story about there being an offer a couple of months back and it falling through due to a chain collapse. Obviously it’s entirely possible but seemed suspicious because it was the same story every single time and all the properties were overpriced.

Honestly I wouldn't touch this seller with a bargepole, they sound like the type to entertain other offers while spending half a year looking for a 'bargain'.

i’m intrigued how he responded see when you took it upon yourself to make an offer on a property without even referring to him?!

Calling your partner a clown or “going mad” is not taking the emotion out if the process. Its just taking out your stress on a family member.

@Alittlebyte I wouldn't want to buy a house with someone who called me a clown. That said, you can normally meet in the middle when the seller sets a price. No point spending £1.5k you don't have to.

And using his money!!

DH wasn't 100% convinced by my offer strategy, but respectfully went with it - luckily for us, it worked.

If you've gone up in increments already, I do understand why he doesn't want to give alway any more, so I'd say to suggest a compromise with vendor mid way, ie £1.5k more.

Why are you buying a house with a control freak who calls you a clown? Seriously.

Are you married to this person?

Seller sounds like someone who wants every last penny that the EA told them they should market for, ignoring the market or the fact that unless it is a highly sought after or unique property, it will likely sell for less than that. Everyone knows that the asking price is the starting point, not its actual worth. Your husband sounds like a clueless fool who thinks he knows more than he actually does.

I would walk away from this one, and make it clear to your husband that you will not entertain this behaviour from him any more, and if he carries on you will not be looking at anymore houses.

to be fair re the control freak

on a previous house the op submitted an offer on a house without even consulting him!

I'm pretty sure "clown" wouldn't be the first word that came to mind if I was in his position.

But maybe he's a Mormon?

It will have been valued on the current condition though. Not on the updated version. So it's not grounds for haggling unless something unexpected comes up in survey.

The only thing that matters is what they will accept and what you will pay. They don't care about the justification.

Well he's fair enough to be annoyed as obviously it should be a joint decision... But what kind of seller doesn't accept the asking price? Are you proceedable?

If your husband was thinking they'd accept an asking price offer if you'd offered less first, I think he's wrong. People know how much they want and the only thing that will change their mind is if the house won't sell. They aren't going to be swayed by negotiating tactics. Unless you've got something good to offer alongside such as no chain cash buyer.

I agree! I know it’s common wisdom to never tell the EA you like or love the house, but I think it’s a bit overstated, if you’re bothering to make an offer you’re obviously interested (and if you’ve been increasing the offer in increments then it’s obvious you’re quite interested whether you say so or not)! But maybe I’m just a fellow 🤡

Some people think they are so clever running down a house to an EA, as if they are tyre kickers looking for a discount. All this is told back to the sellers who are often much more receptive to offers from viewers who were polite or complimentary about their home.

Does anybody really think because someone said a few polite words about a house that they are going to be a pushover when it comes to price? The only impression that's formed is that they have manners and may not be as difficult to deal with as some.

Tbf you haven't been "negotiating" you've been making offers and the seller has been refusing them.

For the sake of £2k I think you're in danger of losing it completely, I hope you don't like it too much.

On that I think the conventional wisdom is wrong. If you come across as finding an emotional connection with the property you're probably seen as a safer buyer less inclined to muck things about. But even someone that loves a property has financial limits.

The absolute error is discussing offers, or offer strategy, or what you can afford, or your limit, etc. with the EA within earshot. You're on a hiding to nothing, because if the EA knows you're willing to spend £X then any offer less than £X will be accompanied with the recommendation to reject the offer.

I think you misunderstand. If the emotion had been taken out of the process in the first place by agreeing a business strategy taking account of the price trends in the area then there’d have been no need for any frustration.