People seem angrier somehow

[MissMarplesCat]

Probably noticed it previously but it really feels that way recently. Other than that, it might be my own perception, but I can't see why. Things are generally ok in my life, and I find it easy to get along with people.

So for a while I notice people are somehow less friendly, some openly rude. I am sure it was always this way, but I'm not too sure.

We have been away to a popular tourist area recently and instead of seeming happy or excited a lot of people looked pretty pissed off, especially on the roads, although the roads weren't packed.

Several people have been openly rude to me, especially men, and I wondered wtf, could it be something about me? I look pretty benign really, so can't see how, but if it happens enough you do wonder!

I get that the world is screwed up right now, and people are having a hard time in general, but to me it seems to be since covid, or maybe it was always there and I have only just noticed?

I don't recall people being so abrupt and unfriendly years ago, but I guess that's all I've got to go on.

I travel around the UK quite a bit with work, and have noticed it all over, not just in my own particular provincial backwater

I live in a 'nice' town and I've noticed a large shift in the mood over the last year. We now have groups of young men loitering in the market square who are quite intimidating and openly smoking cannabis. As a result, I'll go to town only for what's needed and pick the local retail park for browsing instead. The result seems to be everyone is on edge and defensive, so there's no stopping for chats which increases the tension. Everyone is on a higher level of alert and can only think about their immediate family and friends (and I include myself in that), with no capacity for strangers.

There's a general lack of optimism and I can't remember the last time any news headline made me feel like there was going to be any good change.

Modern media, not just social media but also the news, mean that you know if your thoughts are shared and they trigger new views too and all this makes you angrier. Whereas in the 70s for example you might have a chat with family and friends and air views and that's it.

Things that make me mildly annoyed, I go on Twitter or Mumsnet and read more and I think yeah too right! And then I feel REALLY angry!

I think more people are being radicalised by the Internet and social media than we care to admit.

Danny Wallace's book "Fuck your very much" shows research that shows rudeness is catching, contagious. Well worth a read (it's also funny!)

I think it's also different stages of life, etc. I have little children and the main thing I notice is that lots and lots of people are really kind to them, engage with them in public, etc. Obviously you get the odd arsehole but overall it's really nice. Given that and that I've also aged out of street sexual harassment, the world feels much friendlier to me than it did 15 years ago, but I don't think anything has changed, my circumstances have. I think a lot of people find that the world feels more hostile and confusing as they age but that doesn't mean that there's been some big cultural shift.

I hear you.
Last week I was driving back home at around 3.30pm. On a horrible stretch of road which goes down quite quickly from 70 to 50 then to 30 as it goes around a huge bend. The road then splits and I was following a huge lorry with foreign licence plate with a company van glued to my rear the whole time.
The road then straightens and goes into 2 lanes. I moved over to the left lane as soon as I could and the lorry remained in the right lane. It was going slow but I could sense that they were unsure of where they were going so I held back a little not wanting to undertake them. Well that incensed the van behind me who remained glued to my bumper flashing lights at me honking his horn. Not sure where he wanted me to go as I was in the left lane and a huge lorry on the right boxing us in.
Van eventually overtook me then cut straight back in and slammed his brakes on.
Then continued to do the same all the way up the a road. Getting in the wrong lane at every island. Cutting me up. Slamming his brakes on. Screaming at me to get out of my car at every island.
Very frightening. The rage that was within him when I'd done nothing wrong.
I was so shaken that I couldn't remember his full licence plate or his full reg to report him.
He was literally held up for seconds. Just seconds and he'd have caused me to have a very serious accident if I'd not held back. There was nowhere to pull over and he was waiting at every island until I got to it

Not surprised my comment was 'thanked' more than your own.

But then that's taking the bait isn't it?
You could say that I am tired of the subject replacing all constructive discussion about literally anything online.
Now fuck off to the Reform threads where you'll feel much more understood..

Also, telling people that the rudeness and aggression they witness in others, especially men, is all in their heads is ...kinda problematic.

So those of us who have witnessed it are simply the victims of our own perception?

Nice try.
I don't have to grow a thicker skin, nor does it render me faulty or weak....which leads me to this observation, too:

Thinking further into this, I also think that the elephant in the room could possibly be a class thing after all. Let's just say there's another brash visitor to UK holiday areas and they aren't the National Trust types....but i do believe they are spending more money, so everything serves them. That's business.

The population of England has increased by 4 million over the last 10 years. It’s projected to hit 70 million by 2026.
where I live it feels oppressive, so many more people on pavements, and in cars.
Trains too are overcrowded.
Now weve stopped going to some local national trust places as it feels stressful trying to park then queue for a crowded place.

To your point, overpopulation is considered to be one of the biggest stressors for all animals, of course including humans.

But they're still poorer than they would have been / expected to be before the COL crisis. It's all relative.

If you're putting less into your investment fund each month because everything has gone up in price and you have to pay VAT on school fees etc. (I know this hasn't happened yet), you're not going to be thrilled, are you.

It doesn't excuse taking out the anger on others though, of course.

I live in America, and with all its problems I can at least rely on good customer service in most places, largely due to tipping culture. I love how sweet and polite the server in the coffee shop is (and this is somewhere where customers don't tip), it genuinely adds a bit of joy to my morning interacting with her.

When I was last in London I had to practically shout my order over two servers in Pret who were chatting among themselves and ignoring me. They then had the audacity to look annoyed that I had interrupted their chat and made them do the job they're being paid to do.

Very easily triggered aren’t you? This is probably how you behave in real life and that’s why you find people treat you the way they do.

It's the vaccine and covid having effects on the brain

Too many people.

I think we feel overcrowded which doesn’t help. I saw a graph that showed just how many extra people we have on this island in the last decade and it’s phenomenal. People feel like they have less money in their pocket and everytime they try and go anywhere it’s packed

I think it's mainly overcrowding too, along with increasing resource scarcity. The declining public realm impacts on everyone, even those who on paper are better off. Covid obviously didn't help, but I think it also coincided with a tipping point in our population, which largely due to immigration has boomed at precisely the time when infrastructure was crumbling rapidly.

I was in central London for the first time in a while at the weekend (I live in an outer suburb) and my main thought throughout was Too. Many. People.

Covid supercharged the negative impact of social media and the connected world

People eat shit processed food that does nothing to help their moods

People are poorer

The country is a mess

24/7/365 culture means nothing is appreciated

Social media created a have it all and fuck everyone else mentality

Extreme vanity

Gen Z having fewer boundaries due to gentle parenting

Vaping and high caffeine energy drinks heighten stress levels

Always feeling insecure because the synthetic online world portrays and favours perfectionism which doesn’t translate easily to real life unless you are wealthy

‘Karen’ and other derogatory names have permeated society

Celebrities getting away with murder with no comeback

Political debate that has become polarised and toxic

Yes, 💯

Life pre covid feels like a dream looking back. Things changed after that, something was lost

Rose tinted glasses , I don't think COVID had that much effect really..now the 90's really were very different but not 4 years ago, no
.

I agree, it goes back long before covid. I’d agree the 90s were very different and I think that’s when the turning point happened. Too many people, too much centralisation, too much globalisation. 90s and 00s set the scene for the unfolding disaster we’re seeing now. Different places being hit at different rates. Some people are only seeing it now, but others were seeing it a decade or two ago.

I notice this online, on social media etc but not in real life. People are pretty friendly and polite where I live.

Lack of hope. Who thinks anything will get better on any front?
Also, everything just breaking down. Took an hour and a half to take a short bus ride through central London yesterday....overcrowding, road works, too much traffic, journey gets cut short, buses pile up in gridlock etc etc. tossed off too early trued walking.....streets were gridlocked with people too. Tiring just being right now

I was just thinking today about how much more threat I feel compared with even ten years ago and I was imagining trying to explain the modern world to my granny and trying to describe the hurdles we jump through to protect ourselves from international criminal gangs. Sou ds daft to put it like that but I hesitate every time I answer an unknown number because a biut 10% of those calls are scammers. The rest are services my disabled dc needs, but each time I prove to a scammer I’m a live number, I attract more of them.

My bank asked me to email them information, while also telling me that it isn’t secure to do so.

When I’m not getting text messages attempting to rob me, I’m getting WhatsApp warnings from my dm warning me of the latest scam she’s heard about.

I hadn’t really thought about it until today but it’s actually an insidious and constant source of stress.

come to Worcestershire- really nice people, strong community spirit too. ☺️

I was in Frinton the other weekend with some friends. Whenever I visit somewhere like that (I live in a London suburb) it's really striking how good manners and social niceties are still upheld - people waiting for each other to pass on pavements; smiling and acknowledging each other; in-person service in shops, with staff happy to chat; cars actually stopping at zebra crossings (a novelty now where I am!); no phones blasting out loud music or people walking around oblivious with air pods in.

Personally, as a born and bred Londoner, I couldn't live in Frinton - too sleepy - but we are planning to move out soon to somewhere a bit calmer and less angry. I don't want DD to have to grow up around people who disregard others and are primed to explode at any moment. Our local high street here feels like you're running the gauntlet every time you walk along it, and I'm always relieved when I arrive home without anything having kicked off.