Occupational flirting

[CuriousJane]

Lighthearted thread!

was just chatting to DH about this. I’m in an industry with lots of very powerful successful middle age men (50s/ 60s). I’m mid 30s, reasonably attractive, successful but not in the same role as these men. I was chatting to DH about how I definitely gently flirt wish these men in work for professional gain. Not overt, or sexual flirting but more banter, putting them down, they seem to love it. I think very successful men really enjoy being sort of put down in a flirty way by younger females.

DH finds it quite humorous and said he can definitely see me doing this and that he can see when I’m doing this with his dad (my fil) which I definitely do. He’s definitely not jealous and if anything finds it quite sexy that I can “manipulate” men like this.

do other women use their sexuality in the workplace? Or am i some kind of succubus.

Everyone is very serious today. In the real world a bit of flirting makes the world go round and has positive social and psychological effects for both participants.

@tothappy

I find myself doing it almost automatically with a certain type of older man, sometimes at work but not always a colleague. Sometimes socially. In my case its less of the putting them down bantz and more of the 'I'm soooo grateful for your help, gosh isn't it HARD this process' or whatever.

This pandering to men and 'you're SO much cleverer than me' damsel in distress / grateful act is ridiculous in the workplace though. Because how does it actually help you get ahead in real terms?

It might make them want to spend more time at your desk but it makes you look incompetent and less bright than you are.

They're hardly likely to promote a woman who tells them they need a man to help them do their job effectively.

Especially as the kind of man who finds the little girl lost act attractive is already more likely to be sexist.

Ah, but I'm not doing it with my managers or anything. I'm talking about male stakeholders/volunteers who work with us and who have institutional knowledge we need but are unwilling to surrender control over their fiefdoms, especially to a woman. I work in community charity- they are everywhere. Older, retired men who like to talk and feel knowledgeable and don't like taking directions from women. They ARE sexist! That's why I do it! It's not to get ahead - it's to get an immediate task done.

And thus the whole sorry sexist mess os perpetuated into the next generation, and the next….

Well said. Everyone (well most people) enjoy a little ego boost.

In answer to the looks & charisma comparison. Any number of people in sales are chosen for it. Go into Boots and look at the makeup ladies. For the most part they are just above average in looks.

Three threads lately have either been started by people like OP, (possibly more) or contributed to heavily by people like OP. I'm wondering if there's been some sort of post in the Daily Fail and we're getting an influx of pervs/incels.

They never come back after the first post either. Or one posts on a normal thread and they all creep out from under their rocks.