To struggle on this salary?

[Unfff]

Or more to the point… think it’s just not worth the hard work anymore?

Had enough. I earn 3,100 a month. My mortgage is 900 and car finance 300. Student loans 300. Nursery is 800 and I get 400 child maintenance. By the time I’ve paid bills… this months heating was 150! Water another 50. Phone bill and Netflix… I’m left with barely anything. My job is really full on and I work late or weekends often… I do t strictly have to but it’s the sort of job where you just do… otherwise things fall apart.

I don’t do expensive things. Can’t actually remember last time I went on holiday! AIBU to find it utterly miserable that taking home this much money means you still can’t just buy a coat or even new jumper etc without having to think twice?!

Bringing all 4 children to a drinking event? Are these drinking events happening so frequently that this dictates the choice of car?

I have two children, but our family events usually involve alcohol - e.g. somebody hosting Sunday dinner with adults drinking wine. 😱

Obviously, people do rent cars, otherwise car rental businesses wouldn't exist. Calling car rental "bizarre" shows that you must live on a different planet.

Buying a small car, when you clearly need a big car is bizarre. Why on earth would I want to mess around hiring cars just to go on holiday?

It's not "financially incontinent" either, because it works out cheaper to own a small car and just rent a larger car when needed.

No it doesn't. It is cheaper to own the correct sized car and never pay extra to rent another car. Have you actually done the sums or looked at how expensive car rental is during school holidays?

Bragging about spaffing £500 on bedding in a thread about struggling is really not a good look.

Short term pain, long term gain. Paying a mortgage is better than going into rental accommodation and having UC to pay for it. Plus on UC you would have to show that you were looking for work and be sanctioned if you don't.
Your home is not only the place you live but your investment that will give you choices later and potentially help your DC.

I was waiting for that.

Also home grown veg, for a full time working single parent is really a practical suggestion.

There is a subsection of MN that think any spending above that they believe everyone should have ( IE a pair of school shoes and a pair of Joggers) is frivolous.

Read the whole thread, my comment is about the costs of things and how much they have gone up.

It’s called wage shrinkage.

Where does bedding even cost that much?? 😭

I’m wondering about £800 nursery & £400 maintenance? Does you ex pay nursery as well? Is it another £800? Or is care split 50/50 so then no maintenance but paying half your nursery fees? Just wondering if you getting a fair deal.

£300 Is a lot on car finance. You can get something decent for £8-£10k. Unless you did and trying to pay off in these 3 years. If so think how well you will be doing in a couple of years.

JFC

M&S and it was 2 sets, that matches the colour
in our bedroom.

I am sorry you are struggling, its really shit.

I am adjusting to an all year round job (from term time only) as single parent to my 9yr old. I am paying out for a childminder but do get some help back. I also rent and my car finance is £180 a month.

I feel if I am left with £1000 a month for fuel, food, extras and savings I am winning. I often go through my statements and add everything up. Maybe you could do budgets? I feel this really helps me. xx

You have family of 4 living comfortably on £550 a month? Clothes, food, kids after school classes, dentist, hairdressers? Like, how?? No holidays? Never go out? Eat only vegetables?

£500 for two m&s bedding sets? 😮 I understand wanting quality but that seems so steep!

I expect there is a very large UC cheque each month that pretty much covers the £1700 rent.

Totally get it OP. It’s your childcare costs. We had it at one point they were £1400. You’ve had some good advice re tax free childcare, also shopping at Aldi which I’m sure someone will have mentioned, it’s still a good saving compared to the older supermarkets.
For us life got easier when we had both at school although we still have wraparound to pay. We use tax free childcare for that too which takes the edge off.

TheSpoonyNavyReader · Today 20:41
In my circles £500 is a drop in the ocean.

Lucky circles. Not sure this is all that relevant to the vast majority.

1k for food and all bills still is fuck all now unfortunately. It is not easy at the moment we’ve all just become accustomed to it.

Maybe - it has gone up to getting something albeit in a sliding scale at £80k though. Plus it’s only taxable income therefore particularly if she pays into pension she would well be under.

Where did I say it was the majority?

If the OP went to Asda and spent £200 on bedding that would be 20% on her monthly budget, people think 1k is a lot of money it’s not and people need to wake up to the fact that it’s a struggle, she still has to pay for food, bills and other expenses.

When people think that M&S is a luxury it’s a very sorry state of affairs.

@localnotail @ThisOldThang no

No uc check don't qualify for anything.
I work really hard for my money we are in a year appeal for pip for dh.

When people think that M&S is a luxury it’s a very sorry state of affairs.

I consider M&S a luxury. My kids consider it a rare treat.

I'm here as a friend, and certainly not an Asda shopper, to suggest you don't die on this particular hill. I'm 100% sure, without checking, that you'd struggle to spend as much as £200 in Asda, on 2 sets of bedding.

Throw in some scatter cushions and extra deep fitted sheets like I did in M&S and it would come to that.

I purchased some Asda bedding once and it was terrible.

The point I am making is that everyone think 1k to pay for food and other bills is a huge amount it’s not.

Oh I agree with you whole heartedly. Your broad point regarding wage shrinkage and the general cost trajectory of every day items is perfectly valid BUT I think you might have missed the mark when citing specific financial examples. I think that is what some previous posters have found insensitive and taken umbridge with.

It's unfair you pay the whole childcare

Due to you paying it all your ex can go to work

Childcare should be 50/50

Would a cm be any cheaper?

How old is dc - when 3 Costa should go down a bit

You do need to write down everything you spend out of that 1000 a month to see where money is going

@Whatamitodonow
You said exactly what I thought!
DH moans as he does shopping at Asda £230 for 4 of us. I have zero sympathy as I would go to Aldi/ Lidl and pick up other bits if needed from Asda.
My fuel is £60 per tank
If heating is extortionate wear more layers and use blankets ! I didn't have central heating until age 7!
Car bought for £3200 5 years old on a bank loan rather than finance so cheaper interest rate £155 pm
Is Netflix necessary? Change to PAYG phone or cheaper contract.
Water - shower rather than bath / wash up once per day, fill water for kettle in cup fulls. Don't use dish washers.
Electric - turn off main lights unless in use and unplug appliances not needed. Use draught excluders.
Gas - decrease temperature on heating and turn off radiators in unused rooms, batch cook stews/ pies/ casseroles/ curry/ pasta bake which can be heated in microwave as needed, split into portions and freeze.

@ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea The poster does not have to defend her choice of car to you

Yes she does. When people drive large and ugly SUVs, that's a choice that directly affects me and all other pedestrians and road users. That means I am permitted to criticise the choice.

If you want to buy a large and ugly SUV, you should be able to explain why you did so when challenged on it.