Why am I all of a sudden attracted to more masculine men

[Larsz]

I turned 30 a few months ago. And a few things happened, all of a sudden I felt almost a sense of urgency to have a baby. And secondly, my taste in men has completely changed. I’ve always liked the indie, sensitive guy who is well educated and into the arts. All of a sudden I’m really attracted to hyper masculine men. Even the body type I am attracted to has changed. I’m curious if it’s socio-cultural factors or biological ones driving this change.

I have been with my fiance since university and out of nowhere I have lost attraction to him. Theoretically he is exactly what I want - kind, evolved and sensitive. He reads more feminist literature than me! But I find myself being attracted to almost his polar opposite.

Anyone else experience this?

Based on?

Its mostly quite lighthearted to be fair...
And men typecast women in much worse ways. A man saying he likes sporty women over bookworms for example would barely raise an eyebrow.

Incidentally, the real dividing line isn't between sporty men and poetry men. That is a false binary. I think actually when most women talk about wanting someone "masculine" its about not fancying someone who is immature - its not where they sit on the scale between "manly" and "womanly" its where they sit on the scale between "manly" and "childish".

Which is why reading poetry and feminist literature is the "unmanly" stereotype people are giving a kicking in this thread? Very childish pastimes those.

(In my experience rugby players tend to be as childish as apparently grown men get.)

This happened for me around the time of having my first child. I became someone who wanted a more masculine, secure man who had a good grip of DIY. I get it!

Interesting as this happened to me at 34 but I have kids already

So what’s the deal here then, is there some sort of catalogue where you choose a rugby player to part exchange with your apparent feminine men that you date until 30? I guess you all go on to have strapping 6 foot sons who can demolish six boxes of wetabix in one sitting, this thread is a bit strange, are there that many rugby players out there for everyone who just wants one 😂

I always think, that if I were in a life or death situation I'd rather it was with a man who could re-wire a house, than one who could write a good thesis.

I have nothing useful to contribute (I can see there have been some great suggestions) but various posts on this thread have made me cackle. Today has been a trying day and I needed this.

I'm laughing at the binary nature of this thread. Where does a skinny girly man with long hair and soft hands who has read the Handmaid's Tale if nothing more academic, knows about cars, opens doors for women, could reasonably be described as an "ally", keeps a beautifully clean house, does DIY and even- gasp!- used to play rugby fit in?! 😆

(other than my bed, very nicely indeed 😉)

Yep, speaking as someone with a stocky, outdoorsy former rugby-playing history graduate husband who's into classical music, I was thinking exactly the same.

Same thing happened to me and I have no idea why. I see myself as quite cerebral and have always been attracted to tall, willowy, intelligent types.

For some reason I'm now into construction workers in steel toed boots.

Sometimes we need to be treated like the d&ty b&tch we are.
Am I allowed to say that?

Having spent the whole of October working on a construction site, any slight glimmer of YMCA type fantasy I may have had has been firmly doused. Bring on the pencil- necked desk jockeys!

Really? I think for me it's the aesthetic rather than the job. More diet coke ad than builder's bum.

They are lumberjacks and they're okay 🎶

You've just described forwards versus backs in rugby

Women are just as primitive as men.

My friend is having a massive crush on some K-pop boy band floppy haired young chap.

She is old enough to be his Mum!

Ugh. Misogynistic porn-speak. No. Save it for your bedroom.

The duality of Hugh Jackman (as marketed to men versus women. I suspect that even the women talking about masculine men might find the left hand image a bit much...)

All these lanky, wan drips sound extremely unattractive to me, but then I’m perimenopausal so maybe there’s something in it! 😂

😂

Riiiiiight. Everybody is like you.

You can express any opinion you like. Just be prepare yourself for criticism, and damn, does that comment ever deserve criticism. You have obviously had too much of the internalized misogyny Kool-aide.