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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Wrap around care for those who don't work??

382 replies

Raisinsandweetabix · 13/11/2024 16:34

Free breakfast clubs, afterschool clubs. Why would you need this if you are at home all day anyway? Another kick in the teeth to working parents. Obviously not including those in dire need of this care.

OP posts:
NewName24 · 13/11/2024 17:30

MurdoMunro · 13/11/2024 17:09

FFS OP. This is nothing to do whether wrap around care should be preserved for particular classes of patent. This is about you and your relationship with your SIL. Close this thread and start a new one and have the decency to be clear about what you are seeking comment about. Did you really think we’d all come on here and say ‘yeah, SAHMs are all useless free loading slags and don’t deserve to have their kids go to after school clubs’. I mean, bloody hell.

Well said.

If you want to just slag off your SiL @Raisinsandweetabix , then be upfront about it in your OP.

If you want to talk about details of a policy that has been released, then at least link to it, so people can have a look at what you are talking about.

DinosaurMunch · 13/11/2024 17:30

Heronwatcher · 13/11/2024 17:23

Because there are lots of very low income deprived households where kids need support despite one, or even both, parents being off work.

Think of parents who are ill, disabled, addicts, mental heath issues, alcoholics, living in poverty, living in a refuge, being looked after by extended family, carers, in houses with domestic violence. Quite likely that one or more of them might not have a job but would we really deny the child a place at breakfast club if it significantly improves their educational outcome?

Yes, or even makes their life slightly better regardless of educational outcome

Heronwatcher · 13/11/2024 17:32

itsmabeline · 13/11/2024 17:29

Our kids are all better off if the kids of parents who are not cared for properly at home spend more time at school getting care than getting substandard care at home.

So it's for the good of society.

Yes agreed and especially with the advent of AI as a matter of economics, not just social ideals, we need to be turning out kids who can get jobs and compete with the brightest and best from China, Japan, India etc if any of us want a decent standard of living. It’s quite literally an investment not a freebie.

@Raisinsandweetabix you do realise that it’s these kids who will probably be paying your pension? Wouldn’t you like them to leave school with some decent GCSEs?

Goscat · 13/11/2024 17:34

Personally I don't mind some getting it free and us paying, means tested = equal opportunity. The major problem we have in our area is that there are severe shortages of places at wraparound facilities and a lot of working parents literally can't send their kids because the places are being allocated to children who's parents don't work. This applies to nursery places too.

BlitheSpirits · 13/11/2024 17:35

mitogoshigg · 13/11/2024 17:00

Breakfast clubs are about nutrition not care principally so why a kick in the teeth?

After school care may be due to chaotic home life

Nope, they are about getting parents into the workplace!

Completelyjo · 13/11/2024 17:35

Raisinsandweetabix · 13/11/2024 17:20

I agree it's for the good of the child. But it's creating a generation of people who think they no longer have to parent their own children! How about encouraging these people (not just women) to get a job, to be pro active? Does the Job centre even exist anymore?

I thought you didn’t want a nanny state?

TaylorSwish · 13/11/2024 17:36

I hope that children that need it get free wraparound care and some food. In fact I love it that they do.

Didshejustsaythatoutloud · 13/11/2024 17:38

Lavender14 · 13/11/2024 16:36

Because some parents are sahm due to poverty or because childcare costs are more than what they earn. Also the stastics are that children of single parent households or low income households (more likely if only one income) have lower educational outcomes and are less likely to engage with extra curricular activities. So it's right that those children and their parents should be targeted for additional support.

Well said 👏

converseandjeans · 13/11/2024 17:38

I agree it's for the good of the child. But it's creating a generation of people who think they no longer have to parent their own children! How about encouraging these people (not just women) to get a job, to be pro active? Does the Job centre even exist anymore?

Where is the Dad in all this? SIL does sound like hard work but there are 2 parents. So why isn't the father taking kids to school or helping them brush teeth?

I think that once kids are older she will get less financially from the state & can't see how she will be able to continue with her holidays to Benidorm. I'm not too envious of what you describe though!

MightyGoldBear · 13/11/2024 17:39

My children are up from 5am everyday (regardless of what we do to help them sleep later) so waiting for 8.45/9am feels like a lifetime. My child with SEN would benefit greatly from a soft landing transition to school. The longer he waits in the morning the more anxious he becomes or he thinks its a weekend and then the idea of school can feel very off putting(who can blame him) so he will refuse (try maintaining a job with a "school refuser")

It would be wonderful to have access to breakfast club and afterschool club. Our school doesn't offer it at all despite the clear need for it from many parents. I think as much as possible should be universally available for children. Give them as much support as possible. It's nothing to do with the parents.

satonacat · 13/11/2024 17:39

@DinosaurMunch please let me know where you see a few hours a week earning you £7k per annum?

Deja321 · 13/11/2024 17:39

Raisinsandweetabix · 13/11/2024 17:20

I agree it's for the good of the child. But it's creating a generation of people who think they no longer have to parent their own children! How about encouraging these people (not just women) to get a job, to be pro active? Does the Job centre even exist anymore?

How old is her youngest child? If at school and she's on uc the job centre should be on her case. Unless she's claiming disability then they'll leave her alone. I think going by some people I know it's impossible to get them to work as they have never ending list of excuses.
I'm a single parent and work. I agree it's frustrating when you see others refusing and getting all the help but I think with those types of parents it's about helping the children. I know a woman who's son was given free breakfast club, school offered it. I think its because mum doesn't cope and child was going to school without breakfast and stressed due to mum's behaviour.

Didshejustsaythatoutloud · 13/11/2024 17:40

Throw the grenade in and casually walk away whistling with your hands behind your back.
🙄

MurdoMunro · 13/11/2024 17:41

BlitheSpirits · 13/11/2024 17:35

Nope, they are about getting parents into the workplace!

Is it? This is what it says on the HM Government Childcare Choices page -

To break down barriers to opportunity and confront child poverty, the government is making plans to fund free breakfast clubs in every primary school, so children start the day ready to learn.

All parents in England with primary school aged children are eligible to access wraparound childcare.

Assuming you are in England. I haven’t checked the devolved nations websites.

Blueblell · 13/11/2024 17:41

It’s for the kids not the parents

LikeARunnerHo · 13/11/2024 17:42

I don’t really understand your point? Why can’t parents take advantage of this ‘just because.’ At the end of the day it’s their children that will benefit from it the most

MurdoMunro · 13/11/2024 17:43

Didshejustsaythatoutloud · 13/11/2024 17:40

Throw the grenade in and casually walk away whistling with your hands behind your back.
🙄

Fucking tedious isn’t it. What do they get from this? Wanking over women fighting? Are we some kind of foxy boxing service?

satonacat · 13/11/2024 17:43

user1497787065 · 13/11/2024 16:50

Free breakfast clubs, free lunches until the age of 8, funded childcare with household income up to 100k. Personally, I think this is all madness. Happy that those in need get help but it need not be universal.

If that's the case I'm thrilled that child and childhoods are back on the agenda and hope this is the start of policies designed to lift children out of poverty.

I will benefit (currently my childcare bill is more than my mortgage) but I'm very happy this isn't just for 'working' families because I'm more worried about the children living in poverty and helping struggling families.

LadyKenya · 13/11/2024 17:43

Startinganew32 · 13/11/2024 17:09

There are shitloads of really inept and outright awful parents. Read the news about certain court cases going on at the moment. That’s why there needs to be intervention to try to help the kids who didn’t ask to be born to these people. This is one form of that intervention.

This. Why should the children, who are totally helpless suffer, because of the family they happen to be born into? This is for the children, how sad that some people would seek to complain about any help that they may receive.

Octavia64 · 13/11/2024 17:43

Raisinsandweetabix · 13/11/2024 17:20

I agree it's for the good of the child. But it's creating a generation of people who think they no longer have to parent their own children! How about encouraging these people (not just women) to get a job, to be pro active? Does the Job centre even exist anymore?

There have ALWAYS been people who think they don't have to parent their own child.

What evidence do you have that a couple of teeth brushing lessons and some books about the dentist mean that more people think they don't need to parent?

Littlemissgobby · 13/11/2024 17:44

Have you thought that some may not be working because they can't get someone to look after kid before school cant afford it . Maybe being free breakfasts mean it convinces a person to take say an early care job and will be finished at 2 etc.

WillowTit · 13/11/2024 17:45

it is for the sake of the child as you say.
good job

GoldenGail · 13/11/2024 17:46

Sirzy · 13/11/2024 16:35

The idea of breakfast clubs is they will be universal.

Sadly not every home is perfect and if these things mean young people are fed before school or are getting opportunities after school then fantastic .

Exactly

WillowTit · 13/11/2024 17:46

and no the job centre doesnt exist

satonacat · 13/11/2024 17:46

Raisinsandweetabix · 13/11/2024 17:04

And here is the reason why. My (estranged) SIL. 6 kids. Very chaotic home life granted. Never ever worked a day in her life. Yet she has the time to do a weekly bonus ball syndicate online. Chasing people for money. Constantly shop for birthday/ Christmas presents. Drinks most weekends, holidays to benidorm. Slag's off the schools constantly on social media (happy to accept their childcare) and yet us MUGS are working our arses off, and have no free time.

So you don't want your nephews and neices to benefit? Because you wouldn't want SIL to indirectly benefit from it.
Something you and your child will get too?

Wanna ban Christmas for those kids too? Wouldn't want them to enjoy themselves.

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