To travel 100 miles a day for work for this salary?

[ThisPeachSnake]

Basically, I'm stuck. I've built my career in London, up to a salary now of 58k. I'm now a specialist in my field and I've worked hard to get here. We have been looking to move out of the city, as we just can't afford to buy here. We have one small child. I'm the main breadwinner, although my partner also works FT.

The only issue is that I can't find an equivalent job outside London. At all. The specs are wrong, or I'd have to take a massive salary cut and be demoted.

The place we are looking at is 50 miles from my work in London. Takes anything between 1hr5min to 2 hours according to Google maps. I can't work from home as I'm in a patient facing job.

So, just that really. Would you travel two hours a day to keep your job?

no, 2hrs each way commute wouldn’t work for me.

Don’t do it. There is a significant difference between what google says it will take time wise versus the reality of doing it in peak hour traffic. I’ve had to travel from the north east of a city to the south east and that journey could double easily with no rhyme or reason. Especially if you need to drive as it’s time you can’t switch off especially after a busy day in a client facing role. Just my 5p. If you do have your heart set on it, do a trial before you accept the job.

Have you run the numbers on the cost of the commute Vs house prices?

I found, slightly to my surprise, that with the cost of rail fares that go up every year, it was cheaper overall for us to stay in London albeit not in central London.

There are still cheaper pockets of London so I would consider that.

I also if you really do want to/have to leave London would prioritise living somewhere sensible for your commute which it doesn't sound like this location is

That wouldn’t work in reality, takes me 13 minutes to get to work via google maps, the reality is more like 35 minutes with traffic.

This sounds like it will be quite taxing- time, energy and money wise.

My brother does this twice a week, about 2.5 hours each way. It's really impacting on his health and family life now after two years. Definitely not sustainable.

Is the train a viable/better option?

For me, just depends if it fits in your routine or what the impact is. Can you wfh 1 day?

I'd just do it, say you need to wfh 1 day a week and look for something else in the meantime if you can't work it out with your employer. If you're specialist on that salary you should have some leverage to wfh at times.

Madness, honestly. I had a commute that was apparently meant to be 45 mins on a good day with no traffic (ha) but the reality was it was closer to 90 mins. Every single day… 3 hours of my life sitting in a car! It was soul destroying.

Having said that, I found an hour on the train each way far more palatable as I could get stuff done.

But 4 hours a day is madness, it’s almost half a day of your life, unpaid, every day, that’s just a vacuum!

Have you looked at the difference in the cost of living in a different bit of the country? Especially with universal credit? You may well end up better off than you think? Or alternatively could you work privately? I assume from your post you are in the NHS?

Is this by train?

If you’re hoping to have DC at some point then the commute will become even harder to handle.

Could you find somewhere cheap / boring to live in outer London instead?

I wouldn't do this.

I moved to a Kent seaside town and still work for a London-based company. Journey each way is at least 2 hours.

I work mostly from home but get exhausted every time I have to be in the office for a meeting or event.

I am planning to leave that job in the Spring because I can't carry on and I no longer want to work in London at all. It does not make sense either financially to pay high train fairs so I am looking for either a local job or a fully remote one.

The commuting time does sound like a lot when you say it, over 2 hours a day, but door to door my commute is an average of 2.5 hrs every day, and that's on a bus/walking in a Northern city and it's just what I do.

I would qualify that by saying its 3 days a week ( wfh 2 days) so maybe that makes it bearable.

Point is, if its public transport its more about reliability of service and cost, rather than time. I wouldn't spend that much time driving .

It says in the OP that they already have a DC, but yes I agree this is what makes it unmanageable - depending on shift pattern. She'll be out the house 7-7 if it's a 9-5, that's the entire time DC will be awake.

Plenty of people in my town get the train an hour to Glasgow and back for work. Itl be hard if it's every day especially with kids unless your dh is there to do school runs and pick ups after school/childcare. Could you get the train or would it be drive and what's the costs on top of mortgage compared to what you pay now.

You have a small child and as they get bigger believe me you will resent the travel time meaning your not seeing them. I have a 45-1 hr commute and every time the train is delayed and I miss seeing them before bed I get sad. Stuck on a train where you are neither working or with family is wasted dead time. Sometimes it's nice for a book or podcast but everyday . I couldn't do it.

You won't see your child probably at all Monday to Friday, some people are fine with that but I know I wouldn't be. It can have a very long-term effect on your relationship with your child. I'd rather rent and have more time to do things that enhance my life than own and just live to work.

Lots of people do - it’s the equivalent of commuting in from Brighton isn’t it? Depends a lot on public transport and what hours you work.

Commuting Brighton to London Bridge is one thing (one direct, frequent train). Commuting from a village outside Brighton to Hammersmith (so drive to nearest station, get on train to Brighton, change for train to London, arrive in London and spend 30-45 mins on the tube) is totally different.

I commuted from London to Stevenage for a year (junior doctor job rotation) - it was tiring but it was manageable. I wouldn’t have wanted to do it forever though, and I didn’t have kids at that point.

I've done 2 hours each way 5 days a week (mix of car/train/walk) and it is not sustainable in the long term, and that was pre DC! 1 to 1hr 15 each way max now.

@ThisPeachSnake is that wage including the london leading?? is there a car park or is it cheaper by train? I think I would try it for a couple of years and see how things work out.

I did. It wasn't planned,we sold our family house, downsized to the bungalow near the sea. I was working nights (nursing) Surrey hospital near where we lived. Moved to Sussex,had interview at local hospital,was going for half days,as we have dogs. The following week DH came home from work,to tell me his company had liquidated. No job from that moment on, and premises locked down! I was on the top pay scale, London weighting and high cost living. I rang and rescinded my notice, and went back to full time. If the weather was bad, I used motorways rather than more rural roads,so it was 53 miles each way. DH had a nervous breakdown, and applied for over 50 jobs. We went to the local jobcentre where we were treated like scum,he said he wasn't crawling down there to be treated like that for £77 a week (this was 2012) I did this for 3 years,then at 65 I retired. I allowed 90 minutes for the journey by road, had a diesel estate,55mpg, and a 12.5 night shift.

I do this twice a week. There is not a cat's chance in hell I'd do it more often than that.

You will not see your child on working days, it's expensive to do a commute that long and spending 10 hours a week sitting down would be terrible for your health. Train delays and strikes are inevitable and stressful and the fares just keep going up and up.

Honestly, don't do it!

I don't feel like an hour commute each way is that bad. I wouldn't do it myself as I'd resent loosing that time too much but loads of people do.

I might do it if it was a very reliable train commute, but I personally would hate to do all that driving.