To travel 100 miles a day for work for this salary?

[ThisPeachSnake]

Basically, I'm stuck. I've built my career in London, up to a salary now of 58k. I'm now a specialist in my field and I've worked hard to get here. We have been looking to move out of the city, as we just can't afford to buy here. We have one small child. I'm the main breadwinner, although my partner also works FT.

The only issue is that I can't find an equivalent job outside London. At all. The specs are wrong, or I'd have to take a massive salary cut and be demoted.

The place we are looking at is 50 miles from my work in London. Takes anything between 1hr5min to 2 hours according to Google maps. I can't work from home as I'm in a patient facing job.

So, just that really. Would you travel two hours a day to keep your job?

I did a 110 mile commute. I did it for 18 months, then got the job I have now. I'd been made redundant and felt out of options. Life was easier when I got a local job, however the big commute job was a good job to have on CV, and helped me get the local job (I'm now five years into this job).

No way , that is not sustainable - you will be exhausted all the time and you will resent it .

I mean - this is like Brighton to London and lots of people do that commute - but I don't know anyone doing it daily.

It's pretty hellish when trains go wrong - it's a long day - the trains are crowded.

will you be driving?

could you choose a smaller home for now in London?

What do you do?

How about another city that is cheaper - are there more job opportunities there? Manchester? Birmingham?

What is your current budget to buy a property and what are you looking for? Realistically, if you want three plus beds, garden, off street parking in a desirable area with excellent schools, close to transport etc then anywhere in SE is going to be out of reach unless you've got a big deposit from inheritance etc.

No it’s a terrible idea with a small child. I have done what was billed as a 45 min commute to London and it was just awful - sometimes the commute would unexpectedly go wrong and it would take twice that.

You’ll resent it, you’ll be stressed out, your dp will be unfairly burdened. You will barely see your child. The salary is not even that great.

I would consider doing it when dc is 12, that is about the age my dd started going to be at 10.30pm and didn’t need me for bedtime stories and homework support.

I'd very much advise against this, previous PPs are absolutely correct about your wellbeing. But also you will barely see your child.

I've done that commute but only for short term gain, like a course that muggy be a couple of years longat most. I would not do it without an exit plan. There are not infrequent Road accidents, rail stoppages, etc., and you'll feel each one so keenly.

I live 45 miles from work and it takes me 1hr10min each way. Fortunately I only need to be in 1-2 days a week. Any more than that would really take its toll.

I used to commute 2 hours each way before I had DC and was just out of uni. After 6 months I asked my boss if I could work strange hours! I went in after rush hour on a Monday, worked late, slept in a colleagues office (my desk was in the open plan section). Got up early and left the train before rush hour on Tuesday evening. WFH Wednesday and the same as above Thursday/Friday. Like that it was manageable but it also helped that I was on a fixed contract so I knew it would end. And I was young!

I had about one hour on one train so that was ok to work/sleep/read. I'm looking for a job now and discounting anything with a commute over 1 hour.

Why not look at moving to an area with and easier commute? And sure you wouldn't drive into London ?

I live in a commuter town. Hundreds of people get on train to London every morning and return each night. Takes 35 mins to Liverpool St plus tube if necessary.

So depending on where you work in London look for nearest big station ie Waterloo, Luv street etc and work your way down that line

Train = a pain but ok, depending on the line and if you have to change, and if you have to stand.

Car = no. My drive to work is 2 hrs each way (or rather, anything between 1 hr 40 mins and 3 hrs each way). Once or twice a week only, if it’s twice in a week it’s exhausting. I couldn’t do every day, especially not if I then had to be pubic/patient facing.

I would as it could end up being two hours if you hit bad traffic or have poor weather. Plus add in the cost factor.

Dh travels 60-90 minutes each way 3-4 times a week. He earns 70k. It does exhaust him.

I (as the person dealing with school run etc) wouldn't travel more than 30 minutes.

As a minimum I would trial the drive a few times before I made any decisions. Try to do it around the times you would be travelling. Work out petrol costs and any other expenses.

An hour on a train each way- maybe. Driving, I wouldn’t want to. My work is peripatetic and I spend a lot of time driving, and it’s crushing because there’s nothing else you can do at the same time (and if it’s stop-start traffic, it’s even worse). And it’s so expensive.

if there was a way to do (say) three compressed days a week like that it might be doable. But I certainly wouldn’t want to build it into five days a week.

Is your specialism really not available anywhere else in the country? Could you look into setting it up somewhere else in a medium-term plan?

I wouldn't remotely consider it for that salary, no. £58k is pretty low by London standards isn't it? If that's the salary ceiling in your field I'd seriously consider retraining in an area that has higher earning potential.

Depends on a few factors - how easy is the route in, what's it like in reality - i.e. driving or train, what's the actual time it's taking people on average compared to what Google maps says. How many times do you have to do it a week?

How much would your travel costs increase? I'm in exactly the same position as you, looked at Reading and tonnes of commuter towns but ended up buying a house in Bromley for £430k, and keeping my travel costs to £20 per day. Glad I did, the train costs would have been eye-watering and basically cancelled it out .

No. A commute like that is brutal. I've done 90mins and that was bad enough, especially post DC. My max now is an hour.

I'd probably suck it up and find a way to stay in London tbh, but it all comes down to your short and long term priorities. Commute length is proven to be a major influence on daily happiness and satisfaction, so a manageable commute is a major priority for me. But you also need to weight long term career progression, especially as you are the breadwinner, and it can be worth sucking up a crappy commute for a fixed period if it gets you in a better position long term.

Do some careful thinking. If staying in London really isn't an option, are there prospects for a radical move to a smaller city where you have opportunities?

Will your partner then be the primary parent responsible for all school and child pickups? Will that impact the salary they can achieve in this new location? What will the cost of travel be?
could you look at shared ownership?
we opted to stay in London, but in a much smaller house than ideal because we don’t want commutes

The only issue is that I can't find an equivalent job outside London. At all. The specs are wrong, or I'd have to take a massive salary cut and be demoted.
Can we assume that patient-facing means NHS?

Remove the London-weighting from your current salary (if you're public sector the weighting should be clear in the pay structure), would this be sufficient for you to move to a new location?

Are you only looking at positions that are currently being advertised rather than roles that exist but are currently occupied, or is this role genuinely so specialised that it only exists in London? You may have to create an opening if one doesn't appear on its own.

I've done it. It was awful.

I would avoid commuting. I moved out of London and lost London weighting (also NHS) but I am actually financially better off. My living costs are half of what they were and my wage is only 15% smaller. It is more difficult to find positions at higher banding outside of London but they do exist. I am also now fully remote despite working in a patient-facing role. I only had to go in maybe three times in as many years on patient request.

Years ago when I was training for my profession I was sent on secondment. It was supposed to be 3 months, lasted a year. According to Google Maps it should take 1hr 25mins to get there in reality it took me about 2.5 - 3 hours every day (each way) doing about 120 miles round trip.

It was EXHAUSTING. It impacted on my life so much. By the end of the year they wanted to keep me on but I just couldn't.

When I qualified getting a job in that 'local' city would have had a way higher salary but when I took into account diesel/ tolls/ wear on the car + my physical and mental well being it was simply not worth it at all.

With a child I would absolutely hate it.

I do it, I commute a minimum of 90 minutes each way into central London four and often five days a week.
I use the time read. Do personal emails and food shopping. I don't have small children though, both mine are young adults and I didn't start this until they were over 16

Did it before, wouldn't do it again now for £100k. Not worth it at all.

Only situation I would do it is if it involves walking a few mins to a train stop, getting on a train you know you'll get a seat, and walking a few mins at the other end.

Absolutely wouldn't do it driving or having to change modes of transport or get connections.

I don't have kids.