Play date in XL Bully house

[Bonneylass]

School mum has invited my son over to play. They own an XL bully. Apparently it’s a lovely dog and they have 3 kids at home. I really don’t want him to go, I just don’t think it’s worth the risk. Is it best to make up an excuse or just be honest? Interested to hear from owners of XL bullies how you would react to this. She’s a lovely lady and ideally I don’t want to piss her off.

I wouldn't let my child go. The thing may react badly to a new child in the house. The mother must be mad to have such a creation the house. They're always "lovely animals" until the kill or maim someone

nope sorry-cos you have dog.

Definite no from me. I’ve always had largish dogs, Great Dane, boxer, alsation I would never have contact willingly with xl bully or bully type and for children it would be a huge no. Even with my Great Dane he turned on a child that came to play. Didn’t bite just charged after him which frightened the life out of us all. The dog didn’t recall; no more children came round to play and that was the decision I made and stuck to. It only takes once….dont take the risk would be my advice.

No way I love dogs and have my own but I would not let my child around that breed though Im sure most of them are lovely I just could not take the chance.

As an owner of big soft retrievers, I'd still say no way. I love dogs but they're dogs and even the most placid ones can at times be unpredictable. XL Bullies are so big and powerful an adult would struggle to stop one. It won't be an easy conversation but your child's safety is paramount.

@catscalledbeanz I assume you’ve not seen the news reports of children who have been killed by their own family XL bully.

I would absolutely say no and be honest about the reason why.

I’m a huge dog lover and an ex dog walker and I would be wary of many unknown dogs with kids under a certain age. Not sure how old your child is but I just don’t think many kids understand the necessary behaviour needed until they get a bit older. Also, as an extremely vigilant and knowledgable owner I just wouldn’t trust many other owners to be as careful as I am.
I’ve seen and experienced too many terrible and ignorant owners. I definitely would say no to this and maybe explain it’s partly about the breed but also the lack of experience/age of your child. Can they come to you instead?

Absolutely no way. These dogs are friendly and playful, until they're not.

We have a very big dog… not an XL, but mixed with a breed banned in other countries and visibly that ‘sort’ of feared dog. and she’s lovely, great with kids etc.

but when they want to bring new friends round I always explain to the parent that we have a big dog, she’s friendly, great with kids etc, and never would I be offended if they said No.

'Great with kids' until they are not. Dd is autistic. In doggy view there is something just off about her. Maybe she moves funny or talks funny.

So many times people have been telling me their dogs are friendly, never hurt a fly... and then they jump and nip at her. They are shocked but I am not - it's happened so many times.

No way would I let her near something that powerful, irrespective of how lovely it is.

Whatever it takes-do NOT go on a play date-nor visit that household for any other reason. XLBs are killing machines with a hair trigger.
Tell her the truth-and at least you won't be asked to visit again; if you make up an excuse you'll be asked again.
Don't play Russian roulette with your child/children's lives-nor yours either.

I’d say no and I’d be honest about why. And that is that I don’t want me child to be around an XL bully because I’m not taking any risks.
But happy to meet up somewhere or for her child to come to our house instead.

She’s probably another XL bully owner who is completely in denial about how dangerous they are. If she was aware of how dangerous they are then she definitely wouldn’t be inviting other people’s children to her house. It’s very worrying that other children could potentially go in to their house.

And if nobody else agrees to a play date at their house, then she will just have to accept that her child misses out on play dates at home. That’s the consequences of owning a dangerous dog. I feel sorry for your DD’s friend living with an XL bully. They should be banned in all houses where children live, and if they are discovered it should be grounds for a referral to social services/police for child neglect as her parents are neglecting her safety.

I'm a real dog lover, but I totally agree. I'd never let an XL Bully or any doberman or rottweiler anywhere near my grandchildren. They're all lovely dogs - until they're not! Children are too precious to risk their lives.

I think it’s best to be honest. Just say that you’re sorry but you don’t feel comfortable. I doubt she’ll be offended by that.

HARD no. And tell her why. She’s an absolute idiot.

Until she isn’t.

They aren't bad dogs they just have notoriously shitty owners. No such thing as bad dogs just dickbag people. You're making a big issue out of nothing and I hope she realises her dog is more important than judgmental and misinformed people.

I have a dog of an old, stable family breed that never features in any bite stats, and has never been known to kill anyone, ever (they dont have the jaws or the instinct for it) -- but I still invoke her to gently discourage other people's kids from coming round. Ah, peace and quiet.

What an idiotic comment.

Feck no.
Donkeys years ago a childminder of ours got a staffy. We just turned up one day and there it was. A rescue staffy.
I simply left with my daughter and didn't return. I heard 3rd hand through the playground chat how utterly unreasonable she thought I was, how she would be there and never let anything happen. She didn't have any reflection on how off her judgement was.

Hell would freeze over before my kids set foot in that house and I'd just just be honest with her about it.

Plenty of people have them in America with no issues, it's not the dog's fault that people in the UK are fucking idiots. You are NOT an animal lover if you think an entire breed should be culled. What about shitty kids who do shitty things bc they have horrible parents? Maybe we should cull all shitty kids too, that would certainly make the world a significantly better place than culling an innocent dog.

I would be honest with her and tell her you just don’t feel comfortable. It’s an absolute no no for me.

Not a fucking chance

NRTFT

There are quite a few in my immediate area, sadly. I know from another thread that some people are surprised and horrified by that, which is understandable, but unfortunately it’s true.