Top Unis - am I missing something?

[OnTheRoll]

DD is in Year 13, predicted 3 A, already has an A from a language A Level she did last year, and 11 GCSEs all 8/9. Got a great work experience in her chosen field, lots of academic reading, etc., etc. Has been working very hard and aiming for a top uni.

The problem is, it seems that unless she gets into Oxbridge, there isn't a suitable option for her?

We are in SE so decided not to go for Durham/Edinburg as the travel is just too much, 5+ hours, and she would not be able to come home more than once a term. She would very much prefer a campus experience rather than a city uni which rules out LSE/UCL in London.

There are of course great options like Warwick, Bristol, Bath, Exeter. We visited and DD loved them and so did I.

But I cannot help thinking that if she were to go to one of those unis she didn't really need to spend that much time working, studying and sacrificing her free time. Does it make sense? Entry requirements in those unis in her subject are all quite lower than her current and predicted grades.

Would appreciate some perspective.

It’s seems very narrow minded to rule out good universities that are 5 hours away. There is a whole world out there to explore! Choose the best university for her and worry about travel later. In reality once she settles it’s probably unlikely she will be hopping home every other weekend.

But I cannot help thinking that if she were to go to one of those unis she didn't really need to spend that much time working, studying and sacrificing her free time

You're coming across as a bit of a snob! Surely you should just be happy that she's got a great work ethics and probably has a bright future ahead of her whichever uni she ends up in

This

Maybe she didn't need to push herself so much. But she did

Maybe that was driven by parental/personal expectations; fear; a love of studying and personal achievement?

Does it matter?

Different universities have different characters and appeal to different people.

My daughter attends one of the top 10 universities and its the top in the country for the course she is doing.

My university wasn't a top university but no one has ever been interested in where I did my degree. In some sectors this may be more important.

Have you considered Southampton? It's also Russel group

OP, you need to spend some time on the UCAS website, there are many courses where those enrolled have 4 x A star at many unis. The exam boards give out more top grades than there are places at Oxbridge!

Also my dc is a top performing school where nearly 50% of the year have 8's and 9's at GCSEs and 30% have 7 or more 9's.

Just because a course typically makes AAB offers doesn't mean that this will be the standard of every other student. Every degree course with AAB minimum entry criteria will have a range of students who got anything from ABB (if contextual offers are made) to 3-A-stars. Those students will then, depending on their intelligence and how hard they work, get a range of degree classes from lower second to first class. The work your child is putting in now to get all the stars at A-Level will make it more likely that she gets a first class degree and a launch into the career of her choice. The AAB student who gets a 2ii degree will not get nearly as much benefit from their university years.

Durham/ Edinburgh - just suck it up. Five hours is completely fine. Absolutely crowds of kids in Durham/ Edinburgh are from the south. They throw themselves into uni during term time - shouldn't be trotting home every five minutes anyway or they'll miss out. She'll come home once per term and you'll visit once per term. The holidays are LONG - trust me, you'll see plenty of her!

That's not "my" antipathy to travel! For God's sake, this is not about me.

She is the one who is discarding Durham (distance) and Edinburg (distance and 4 years). I told her from the onset that it's up to her to decided. She is leaving home anyway and personally I will cope with whatever the set-up is.

If she's worked that hard for those grades surely she is willing to travel to a top university? Sorry but it's completely mind boggling to me you'd put in all that effort but then not go to a suitable school because it's "too far", she'll be an adult, location from home really shouldn't be a factor, it wasn't for me and I wasn't even trying to go to a top school.

Please don't let her waste her potential by keeping her closer to home, you should be encouraging her to focus on the school, not proximity to home.

Is the worry that she will be too clever for the other places and will feel slowed down by the mass of thickos who only got 3 As? Because you may be in for a shock…. Also A level performance isn’t directly linked to eventual degree result. I work at one of the places you listed. Some of our top performers came in on contextual offers or missed the grades slightly. Conversely I had to have an hour long meeting with a distraught student who had 4 A*s and couldn’t understand why she was getting mediocre grades at university.

So there you go. Without her excellent predicted grades she may not have got that. So the work has been worth it. I don't see the issue. They're getting their offers out quickly this year!

Also this. My daughter hasn't been home yet and doesn't intend to come back before the end of the semester. She's joined a group which meets on a Sunday afternoon and is working hard and enjoying student life.

She's 2.5 hours away which, whilst isn't 5 hours, it's not just down the road.

If you're bothered about the rank of the university she goes to, it doesn't make sense that you'd also limit her choices by distance/location.

Male the decision on proximity to home or make it in the status of the university.

It is an odd post because you're asking people to solve a problem that doesn't actually exist.

Great that she has been so motivated to work hard and excel. Less great if she has been motivated purely by the prospect of going to one of a very small clutch of universities.

If her motivation is entirely extrinsic, she may find it hard to motivate herself to study hard at university - particularly if she's outside Oxbridge and will have a very large degree of autonomy about how much effort she puts in.

I rather suspect though that the child you describe will work hard and thrive wherever she is. Think she needs to know that there is a huge range of abilities in most courses in most RG universities, and, as PPs have said, vastly more kids get Oxbridge grades than there are Oxbridge places - they are all somewhere! And she will get out what she puts in. Some undergrads coast along doing the minimum and others work hard and fly high. Sounds like she will be one of the high flyers, wherever she goes, and she will find her people.

You're sounding quite ridiculous, OP.

I had a place at Durham many years ago. Turned it down and went to non-red brick uni further away and over 8 hours from my home. Best decision I could have made. I had a wonderful time at university, met and made amazing friends, enjoyed myself a lot!

I find your post a bit confusing. Surely she knew what universities existed before she made the decision to study so hard to get there? Did she only work hard to get herself to a good uni like Oxford and Cambridge? or does she generally like studying? Why does she want to go to a 'top university'? Is it for the facilities? The teaching? Status? Is academics her thing? Will she be happy continuing to work very hard for the university years and beyond.

I know top unis are harder than they used to be to get into, but I got pooled for Cambridge and accepted for Durham for a similar subject and my A levels were terrible!!! They also used to consider non academic things. Does your daughter also have other things on her CV to show she's well rounded? Like sports team? Drama? DofE? Etc...

Well she's going to have to decide what is really important to her then.

I am not keeping her close to home, I want to her to go as far as she wants. Again, this is not about me. She actually wants to go to the US after and I am only encouraging her to go for it.

She is the kind of child who takes a while to settle and make friends. Which is one of the reasons she wants to live on the campus in a closer student community. I have no idea how often she will choose the option to visit home once she's enrolled, and neither does she. But she has to make her choices now.

Is she actually applying for Oxbridge or dismissing them too because they are not campus universities? If she doesn’t get in there then that is a reality check that she is only good enough for the second rate institutions for dimwits as you seem to see them

I don't understand your logic OP. University isn't school. It's an opportunity for you to read, learn and specialise. You don't get 'taught', lectures are an introduction to a topic and you are expected to put the work in. You get out what you put in. If she is less inclined to study at a university because 'she doesn't have to' that is, in the nicest way possible, a reflection of her rather the university. Why would you go to university of you want to do the minimum possible to obtain the degree. In some ways, attending a university where there is less pressure to churn out an essay a week (as in Oxford) gives you more opportunities to specialise in something that interests you. The attitude you describe won't get your DD far in life. (Btw I'm not saying she has this attitude, she is clearly bright, it's just the way you are coming across in your OP).

I don’t really get this post at all. Learning is its own reward?

Seems like a weird humble brag but then followed up with “my DC is so academic and committed, but couldn’t possibly sacrifice some extra travel time or live in a city to pursue their chosen subject.” Also politics is hardly a super directional subject, it’s not like she wants to do some niche subset of marine biology that only 3 unis in the country offer.

Hope DC gets into Oxbridge I guess (been there, did PPE, 1 on 1 or 2 on 1 tutorials are great but otherwise not as special as the world thinks).

Why did she not go for HSPS at Cambridge, or Politics and History at Oxford? It’s a bit late to still be choosing unis in year 13 (and already well past the Oxbridge deadline), has her school not tried to hurry her along?

Agree with PPs saying they don’t quite understand why you’ve ruled out the great unis like Edinburgh, Warwick, Durham. Even if you were going to go for Oxbridge, they should still be on your list. Not crazy about the London unis… but that’s my personal perspective.

A lot of the entry grade is about competition for the course and not what you need to carry on the studies. Higher grades are better prep hopefully for when you get there.

So the universities you mention as not good enough are asking for 1 A star and 2 As, 2 A stars and an A or 3 A stars in the subject my son is interested in. It's a very popular course and they can.

I don't think they universally ask for these grades. There are other similar courses he could pick with lower entry at the same uni.

Well, it’s a little odd to care about going to a top university and then ruling out the vast majority due to pretty spurious reasons. I think you need to encourage her to be a little less rigid in her thinking!

You apply for the universities and courses she wants and hope she gets her top choice. Or am I missing something? I certainly wouldn't pout all my eggs in the one basket and I would also not suggest that certain courses/ unis may be beneath her, I don't think that will serve her well.

She has indeed applied for Cambridge. And she got an offer from Warwick.

Edinburg and Durham, she is not sure about due to sheer distance. But she still has two choices to fill in her UCAS form hence this thread.