My son's barber's tattoo

[sunshineandskyscrapers]

I took DS (9) to the barber's this afternoon. It's a shop we've used a few times before, now that he's pretty much aged out of the designated kiddy hairdresser, which is also a bit of a drive away, whereas this one is local and you can usually book in the day before. The shop is part of a chain. We've booked in with the two female barbers there previously but they were already booked up for today so I booked in with a guy. First time a man's cut my son's hair but he seemed perfectly lovely and took his time to do a really nice job on my son's hair.

So the problem I have is that the barber was wearing shorts showing a large tattoo of Andrew Tate on his lower leg. This had no impact on my son's experience at all, but made me feel uneasy that my son was in the company of a man who chooses to act as a human billboard for a misogynistic arsehole in his place of work, and worrying that this man can sport this tattoo so overtly with nobody batting an eyelid. And by paying for his services I am supporting him. I might be more sensitive to this today, as this morning I had a conversation with a colleague whose family member is in a coercive relationships with an Andrew Tate supporter and the details of this were really unpleasant.

I am not sure what my AIBU is. I won't book in with this barber again, but not sure if I should also avoid the whole shop due to their seeming acceptance of the casual misogyny. Is this just what barber shops are like or is this likely to be a one-off arsehole?

Also I feel confused. Surely any woman is going to run a mile from any man who supports Andrew Tate to the extent that he has him tattooed on his leg. Or as an Andrew Tate supporter is he so confident in his abilities to control and abuse women that he doesn't feel the badge of honour will hamper his efforts? I feel slightly regretful that I didn't ask him.

On tenterhooks here

I remember when MN posters were threatening to leave their spouses/end 20 year friendships if said spouse/mate voted for Brexit or took a different view on the Scottish referendum or voted Tory. Yet somehow the OP is bonkers because she doesn't want to financially support a man who aligns with a rapist and people trafficker? And doesn't want to see this alignment openly displayed in a public facing workplace?

Lots of businesses/professions ask employees to cover tattoos or not to be openly political in the workplace.

Every cloud.

Was this the tattoo?

There should be zero tolerance for those people expressing intolerant right wing views.

I think I might have just asked him who it was? And then got into an argument with him, so probably not a good idea! I certainly wouldn't want to have any dealings with anyone supporting Andrew Tate.
As for shorts, my adult son wears them all year round because he prefers them - has to be below freezing for him to cover up, he just doesn't feel the cold.

I'm on the fence with this.

Yes - he's an absolute prick, and I wouldn't want to support anyone who supports him.

But, where does this stop?

If someone has a tattoo of a spider/ dolphin/ butterfly and you (not 'you' a person) doesn't like that, but would you not use their services?

I know I'm being flip, and I want to reiterate Andrew Tate is a twat!

Completely incomparable.
You can dislike tattoos, find them chavvy or whatever and it boils down to personal taste.
Having a tattoo of someone so disgusting is sending a message about the persons morals and values. Andrew Tate hates women so does that mean the barber does too? Certainly suggests so.
It's similar to those who have swastikas tattooed on them. Says a lot about their views and I doubt it would be allowed to be on view in any job role.
Op you're not unreasonable to feel ugh about it. I think I would have had to say something casually even just 'nice tattoo' with a massive eye roll. And I'd complain to the barbers too. If he's going to have something so offensive tattooed on him he should at least cover it up.

Maybe it's one of those new-fangled indoor barber shops!

As if, too much vino?

I certainly believe in a person's right to have whatever they want tattooed on their own body - freedom of speech means hearing/seeing things we personally find offensive because of the wider principle. And actually, I'd rather views were openly expressed in people's private lives, even when they are offensive, because I prefer to know who I'm dealing with. But workplaces are different. No one needs to be discussing or advertising their support of rape, at work!

To me the test is whether you'd want your child's school teacher to be sporting such a thing at work. If not, then no one should.

You’re also free not to hand over your money to overt misogynists.

Nobody has suggested everyone’s views need to align. But you know that.

A better comparison would be:
They have a religious symbol tattooed, I don't agree with that religion/all religion so I don't want them near my child
We are an Arsenal household but they have a Liverpool tattoo. (Football is.. stupidly competitive like this)
They have Harry Potter tattoos so they support JKR and are therefore a massive transphobe
They have horror tattoos so must be a warped person because they enjoy that sort of thing

Andrew Tate would probably fall under the category of "offensive tattoos which should be covered" like naked people, swearing etc. But the most that will happen is he will be told to make sure its covered (if it even is Andrew Tate)

It sounds really weird for a barber to have a Tate tatoo. Can you please tell him that you heard a clip where Tate dictated that all male hairdressers were fagots. Not true to my knowledge but it seems like something he could say.

Go somewhere else.

If only it was that easy to spot all Andre Tate followers...

I'm male. Last year I had a look at what Andrew Tate says...some is very good advice to young men. "If a girl isn't interested move on, don't pursue her". Then you hear what he says about protecting women...ok a bit old fashioned but yes traditionally males took a protective role.

Then he described women as property...WTF.

And this within 10 minutes of me looking into his views!

I agree.

I wouldn't want to give a single penny to a man who supports that vile disgusting creep.

And I would also be writing to let them know why I wouldn't be back.

To have something tattooed on your body generally means you feel quite strongly about it. Actively showing off a tattoo like this sends a clear message about what the man believes. And he probably believes it quite passionately to have it tattooed on him. He clearly supports the vile, abusive misogyny that Tate the twat peddles. And I wouldn't want to support someone who thinks like that.

For those saying it's only a tattoo, don't complain and get the poor chap fired....would you feel the same if someone had a swastika tattooed on their forehead? Would you want them cutting your kids hair or doing your nails or coming round to your house to change a radiator or any other paid job? I bloody wouldn't. And I'd tell them why.

Exactly, not really shorts weather atm assuming it's in the UK

I wouldn't go back. I might even mention it in a review.

Do you know what? I actually don't think I know what the misogynistic arsehole actually looks like, I'd have to Google him (which is not happening) so pretty sure I'd have no idea if he was a tattoo on someone.

Not going to him again is perfectly fine, but trying to get him fired is not. For one thing, what if the tattoo is not Tate?

If it's not Tate then he'd explain that surely. If it is Tate I don't think he should be working with the public with something like that on show.

I was going to say YABU, it's his body etc. But actually that would really put me off. I wouldn't be back.

Not really.

I have personal meaningful tattoos of the names of people I love... I have been told this is 'tacky' to have names by non other that tattoo artist themselves. I have had to justify what I want on my body and reassure them I won't 'divorce' my child.

I also however know people who have had used tampons tattooed on them for a laugh and thats deemed absoloutly fine. Most tattoo artist have tonnes of pre-made flash of random things and 'funny' thing and often off discounts on 'art piece' portraits they want to do that good tattooist will have people lining up round the block for not because they desperately obsessed with Marilyn Monroe or Freddie Kruger etc... but because they want a really well done tattoo by an artist.

You just have to watch tattoo reality shows to see people will even get joke Hitler tattoo's on them for 'shock value' rather than because they have anything to do with Nazi beliefs.