Haven’t paid rent in months!

[Uppoopcreek]

I’ve just realised I haven’t paid my rent in around 6 months! I don’t know how this could have happened?
ive lived here around 4 years. All I can think is I set up a standing order a while ago and it didn’t work properly?
now, I have pretty severe MH problems. Awful anxiety and depression(probable ADHD but still waiting for an appointment to start the process). I never check my bank, I’m behind with other bills, too. I’m a bury my head in the sand type of person, but worry constantly about everything, About a month ago I hit rock bottom. Won’t go into details, but it wasn’t great.
I have 3 DC, and I’m on benefits.
Help! What do I do?! Had a text from landlord last night asking me to call him, which is what’s just prompted me to look now. I was asleep when he text.

This comment is the reality of the situation

I’m sorry for what you have gone through really I am but it is not an excuse to not pay your rent when you are clothing your children in m & S and next whilst not paying your rent

"I’ve just realised I haven’t paid my rent in around 6 months! I don’t know how this could have happened?"

You have answered your own question OP in your initial post.

" I never check my bank, I’m behind with other bills, too. I’m a bury my head in the sand type of person"

This is how this situation has happened. But making that statement you have indicated you are aware you do not do any financial house keeping.

There you are.

Sounds tough OP.
I hope you’ve managed to sort something with the landlord today.

Sorry but I worked in a bank for 40 years. Standing orders do work properly or, to be more accuruate, never in 40 years did I come across a standibg order that didn't. Landlords do not generally let 6 months go by without payment and without bringing this up (unless there's been another issue that stopped landlord doing so, such as ill health). Is it just the rent you haven't paid or are there other bills you haven't paid as well? I suggest you seek assistance from Citizens Advice and hope the landlord will agree a repayment plan. You need to find a way of meeting your bills and hopefully CAB could assist you to come up with a plan

👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

Some people really don't get mental health on this thread & others are extremely sympathetic. I'm sure the person who made the post is extremely overwhelmed 🙄. Don't judge other people, simple. No one is perfect 👌

Get a diary and write things down you absolutely must do. Like paying rent. Even if it's only one or two things a week. And if you don't do them write them. In for the next week.

I’m sure the landlord is overwhelmed too

No, not at the time, but like the OP, later, when in recovery, you realise bills haven't been paid/ debts have mounted up.

I think some folk don't realise how lucky they are to have brains that function reliably and usefully the majority of the time.

I can absolutely see me in past years, sticking my head in the sand, having the increase in utility bills come out of the unspent rent, whilst I hope fervently I am not racking up a huge debt with a utility company that I can't pay... not realising its coming out of the rent that isn't going where it should or the odd excessive spend in the supermarket...

You just keep your head down, avoid letters, hope that your card works in the store or the online payment goes through and if it does you push that thought on to the next time and the next, without fully adding up whats gone where.

@Uppoopcreek I hope you can talk to the Landlord and they'll give you some leeway to sort this out. IF you communicate with them and make promises you can keep, and KEEP talking to them, don't disappear... there is a chance.

If you ignore them, there won't be.

I'm sure most people do understand mental ill health. Many have personally experienced it, and many have had training in their workplaces about mental health problems. Unfortunately, failing to pay your rent does not reduce mental ill health and may exacerbate it when the landlord presses their right to be paid for the home they're providing. Occupying someone else's property is not free of charge. CAB may help come up with a plan but the OP needs to pay their rent or they could end up homeless. We don't know the landlord's circumstances. They might need the rent money to cover their own bills

What’s COL?

OP I just wanted to say that I completely understand how this has happened - I have ADHD and depression and have had similar experiences - spending thousands without knowing and being unable to keep track of money.

The good thing is you've realised now and can talk to your landlord.

Definitely also speak to CAB and see what they advise.

Cost of living

Exactly

My sympathy is with the bereaved landlord, not the OP, who has been chancing her arm and won't be back.

Oh god! I had no idea!
thank you !!

So you can spend thousands but you couldn’t pay your rent?

I find tracking my spending incredibly difficult - so, if my standing order hadn't been going through I wouldn't necessarily be aware that the money I was using was 'rent' money.

The landlord may have ADHD, either way he’s definitely grieving the loss of his child which must have been devastating.

Standing orders always go through and only cease when you stop them. I’m not attacking you but if a person is capable of spending thousands then they are capable of spending money on their rent.

You need to get your life in order and I say that kindly. I don’t think there are any excuses to not pay what you owe and risk your children’s security. they are your children and you have a responsibility to keep a roof over their head.

i haven’t read the full thread but I hope you get it sorted and take this as a wake up call.

As a side note, it's pretty horrific that there's a well known acronym for this state of affairs. It should never have been allowed to get to this.

But it is a card that people play and it pretend they don’t is ludicrous