DP friends with people much younger, then “hanging out” in her room

[Blinkandgone]

Hi all, my DP is 26, I’m 30. In a lot of ways he seems a lot younger than me, for example I have a 3 year old, he has no children. Our lives are also just very different, he lives in a zone 1 house share while I’m out in Essex with my own little house. We’ve been together 6 months and increasingly it feels like it won’t last.
Heres the latest situation, his workplace has taken on a few degree apprentices and grads this year, there’s only maybe 40 people in his office and they are all quite social. Until lately his friends from work have been younger but not by much think around 23-25. However he’s now befriended 2 of the degree apprentices who are 18 and 19 and a grad who’s 21. It feels odd to me that he’s friends with people who are barely adults but it’s the nature of his office so okay.
On Thursday a group of them went drinking after work, he and one other were older guys 26 and 29, then a bunch of younger girls at 24,24,22,21,19 and 18. The other guy is dating one of the girls so that didn’t seem as weird but to me it was odd he was with these much younger girls.
Then on Friday he was chatting to me and he was telling me how one of these girls must me super rich, I was like how do you even know? And he told me that the work drinks stopped at 8, they got a cab back to hers, he waited in her room while she got changed, then they walked back a little more central and got more drinks - she’s 18!! In fact I found her instagram she’s barely been 18 3 months!!
It’s so odd to me that he was just sat on some 18 year olds bed at her parents home while she got changed then went for drinks with her alone! And that’s on top of the being friends with all the much younger girls.

AIBU to think it’s weird? He thinks I’m making it weird and he was just drinking with a friend but she’s a child more or less!

Shes 4 years older than him, not 8. She's got a problem with the very young ones who are 18.

And a woman of thirty with a young child and a house out in Essex is especially different from a childfree 26 year old man house sharing in zone 1 and working in a lively workplace full of young people.

A 26 year old woman who was starting to think about settling down might be suited to a 30 year old man with a 3 year old and a house in Essex, but it doesn't work the other way around. Unless of course the OP is exceptionally hot in which case that trumps everything else.

What @Eviebeans said. The older bloke younger girl dynamics was rife in the 90s. I recall my mates of 15 or 16 "dating" grown men in their early 20s! I was shocked then but am even more shocked now that it went on. Teachers and parents didn't step in to say this isn't acceptable or appropriate.

When he said he "was good with kids".

You were hoping he'd mean yours. Not the 18 year old at work.

I think you're being optimistic here. He's young, in the city, with 18 year old girls who want to impress him.

26 is not 'young'. But you've done a good job with being a misogynist and suggesting that 26 year old men are entitled to chase 18 year old girls when they're with someone else.

@TheYearOfSmallThings tell me you're a man without telling me you're a man 🙄🥱🥱🥱

A 26 year old woman who was starting to think about settling down might be suited to a 30 year old man with a 3 year old and a house in Essex, but it doesn't work the other way around. Unless of course the OP is exceptionally hot in which case that trumps everything else.

It looks like he is ‘into kids’ if he’s perving on teenage girls getting changed.

Bad guess

You're a woman who has internalised misogyny then. Give yourself a pat on the back 🙄🙄🙄

You're a woman who guessed wrong and seemingly gets aggressively snide towards anyone who sees a situation differently from you.

Is that really who you want to be? If so, pat yourself on the back.

It's so silly when women say "you must be a man" just because you think differently to them. It shows that they very much believe all women should be a certain way and all men should be too. They must put awful pressure on their kids to conform to these gender roles.

Whatever. Your post is yuck and most reasonable people will see that.

'Women should never expect to date younger men unless they're exceptionally hot'. Men on the other hand can be balding with a dad bod and still expect a childless woman to be interested in them. Yuck 🤮

Gosh to be 26 and working in London again, my social life was amazing and I really enjoyed the mixed age group. The child free people obviously socialised a lot more, we even went on multiple holidays a year together. I really don't think your lives are compatible but you appear to be aware of that, I think he probably is too.

Money counts too

I find it a bit weird you can list the precise ages of all seven or so people he went out with.

Given that you've only been going out a few months, and you've said yourself that you don't see this getting serious, I don't think you get a lot of say in who he hangs out with really.

You do have a say however in whether you want to go out with him. It doesn't sound like your lifestyles mesh particularly, and you're expecting a level of commitment he's not interested in at this stage. So if I were you I'd be questioning why you're going out with him.

Yes, this.