to feel like I'm in prison?

[TheSunflower5927]

I 36 and I hate working. I've tried changing jobs multiple times but I dont get the enthusiasm other people have. Work full time. All my friends and family dislike their jobs too. The only people that seem to like their jobs are at work. Full time working just takes up so much time the weekend seems too short.

If I didnt work could happily fill my time with fun things to do that arent work

Working full time feels like a prison sentence. Dont know how I can go another 30 or so years it feels like I've got 30 years of my sentence left.

@Comedycook this is literally it there is very little time for anything else and with cost of living I feel I just live to work

Those of you saying affording fun things are assuming people have the disposable income for fun things which because of cost of living a lot dont atm

Well, with prison you have two choices - either hate everyday and drive yourself into despair and serious mental health problems, or change your mindset, find the positives, and crack on.

You r not in prison, but the same applies. If there is no way at all you can change your job for one you enjoy, then force yourself to.love what you are doing. Tell yourself every day how lucky you are to have a job and all the positives about it.

It's up to you - either you can make yourself miserable by telling yourself everyday how horrible this is, or you can change your self talk and start enjoying yourself.

Your choice.

I think there’s a certain extent to which we all just have to suck it up and get on with it. Most people don’t love their jobs so much that they wouldn’t happily get back at least some more real leisure time.

But there probably are jobs out there that you wouldn’t utterly hate and that you would be able to get (so I don’t mean like movie star or something). The question is, are you prepared to live with the salary they pay? Would you be prepared to alter the rest of your life to fit that salary?

I get its not actually prison either....

I think it's partly the job and partly the company/manager.

I was stressed to hell on my last job, I won't go into the details but I was in the brink of a breakdown.

My new job is boriiiiiing but my manager is lovely so I just plod on and think about my pay cheque. I also have Wednesdays off with my toddler and that feels much harder than working 🤣

Also having grown up on what you might call a smallholding where we were self sufficient, framed and raised animals... That's not the escape you think it is, it is hard manual labour, long days and you don't get to take annual leave.

You know, you are capable of actually doing this. What stops you?

Read Rich Dad Poor Dad, get passive income, or start an MLM from your tent in the countryside!

I also can’t stand working and would happily be unemployed if I had an endless stream of money.

Can you get a civil service/LG job? That’s where I am now, I’m staying in a low grade to avoid responsibilities. WFH 3 days a week, flexi hours, 30 days annual leave plus bankable hours, usually listen to a podcast while getting through tasks. I keep organised and on top of things but don’t over exert. I could never go back to private sector or sales roles ever again.

And play the lotto every week!

the cost of living is very high and people are working for the necessities. I understand that. However, if you didn’t work, you wouldn’t have anything. How would that be better?

seriously OP. You need to grow up.

Sounds like you've got depression.

How long have you been trying to get a Doctors appt for your depression?

Can you get a job that is earlier starts to give you more free time later in the day? Maybe a (slight) wage increase for unsociable hours?
A four on four off job?
I totally get it doesn't help with the COL immediately though. It's a shit show for sure.
There are definitely people who save like fuck and live very very frugally, saving for the future.
Are you able to make any changes at all? Sure there are youtubers and instagrammers or even MNsetters who do this.
Just a thought.
Hope you find your happy place 🌸

@YellowphantGrey no gave up kept calling but they'd say stuff like call back tommorow etc I gave up.

@PattiSmithsPattis thank u

Cost of living and NHS are some of worst issues for UK

But it doesn't have to be that way. I genuinely enjoy my job. Friday night / Monday morning, it's all the same to me

Find something you can do self employed, I had to give up work to work around children and step children, I started a little cleaning business, worked the hours I wanted, no one was my boss, picked the clients I wanted, charged what I wanted, took nothing to set up and I would still have been doing it today if COVID hadn't come along. Then I had to get a proper job and i'm kind of stuck here now.

I would prefer not to work though, be a housewife, i'd quite like pottering around, having all the housework done, washing, making meals from scratch, popping to the gym when it's quiet, taking up gardening. Maybe if my numbers come up Friday night, until then its back to the grindstone.

Work compressed hours to give yourself a 3 day weekend.

Alternatively are you sure you can't afford to cut hours? Move, restrict spending drastically?

@HesusCuckingFrist you are assuming I have disposable income I can cut

Have a little burnout from previous job so working compressed hours would possibly kill me

Oh come on. That's hardly realistic.

Can you not go into the surgery and book the appointment face to face?

I do this now if I can, as in not too unwell to leave the house.

Some people sucking it up manage to do a good enough job. With others their lack of motivation becomes obvious, they perform poorly and as a result like their jobs less and less.

Op, what do you want to achieve from this thread? I ask as people have been offering different solutions yet you put barriers up
to all of these.

im sorry to hear of your depression. I know it can be hard to get appropriate treatment from the NHS, but please keep trying as this will help with your issues around work.

How in depth have you got into your budget? Have you got a big mortgage? Can you relocate? Can you downsize? Can you cut any non essentials (even netflix etc) can you shop elsewhere? Can you make extra money on the side? Give us some detail.

What kind of job do you have op?

So find something you like doing then it doesn't feel like work. I know a number of people who work fewer days (compressed hours) so get a 3 day week end every other week, work 4 days each each doing a day with kids, reduces childcare bills enabling them to do this.

The only thing I would say is if you dislike working stick lots of extra cash in private pensions set to release at 55. Living and working conventionally is not always the answer of people. You sound like a work to live person rather than a live to work. Work hard enough to go up the ladder quickly, get the better paid roles, then compress or reduce hours and make your time off count.