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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Cheating dilemma

25 replies

morallama · 21/10/2024 22:59

Adam is someone I know. He has cheated in every relationship he’s had. Gone from one girl to the next before the previous has finished.
person he’s with now (call her Bianca) he has two kids with. They got together when both had partners. She got pregnant straight away.

But Adam said he’s in love with a woman (Claire) he’s previously been seeing who has a husband (Dave) and two kids.
All four were good friends, and Adam and Dave worked together.
Bianca found out about all this after Dave found the messages on Facebook of Adam & Claire declaring love for each other and sending photos of each other& told everyone.
Adam & Claire went round to Adam’s parents house a few days after his mom died & were there for two hours. Apparently she was consoling him and they were just cuddling

Bianca forgave Adam, but stopped her friendship with Claire. But Adam and Claire are still messaging privately.

Adam keeps putting off marrying Bianca because he says he’s scared to commit. But surely 2 kids and living together is loads of commitment so what’s a bit more.

I am fed up of seeing Adam hurting people and gaslighting them. He has made exes feel like they’re going crazy. I want to get involved and say / message Bianca slyly to let her know the affair is still ongoing. It feels to me this emotional affair is more hurtful than just a one off sexual encounter

OP posts:
ReginaaPhalangee · 21/10/2024 23:02

Stay out of their business.

TaggySits · 21/10/2024 23:11

What does Eric think?

Jimmyville · 21/10/2024 23:13

TaggySits · 21/10/2024 23:11

What does Eric think?

And Florence?

Silvertulips · 21/10/2024 23:16

It doesn’t matter wha t you think. Bianca knows what he’s like and probably suspects something is going on. Woman like Bianca won’t leave until they absolutely have to.

No good will come of it.

Scissor · 21/10/2024 23:17

Jimmyville · 21/10/2024 23:13

And Florence?

Now don't go dragging Flo into this. She's been a right one!
And Eric should just hang his head.
It's Chlamydia I feel sorry for, she's never been the same since the tablets.

Windywandy · 21/10/2024 23:27

Personally I'd be keeping out of it. And avoiding the lot of them.

Thatsmyjob · 21/10/2024 23:30

It's Maisie who drew the short straw, I heard she had matched with them all on tinder and was setting up for a good weekend.

AlmostAJillSandwich · 21/10/2024 23:34

Bianca made her bed, she was well aware of what he was like and didn't care when it was her taking him off another woman, and doing the dirty herself on her previous partner. What goes around comes around, more fool her having kids with him, she must have known it would end like this.

Or she was deluded to think she was special and such a prize he wouldn't do it to her. Once a cheat, always a cheat.

Noseybookworm · 22/10/2024 00:42

Stay out of it, it's not your business!

vodkaredbullgirl · 22/10/2024 00:57

Soap drama

MadnessIsMyMiddleName · 22/10/2024 02:52

So Adam & Claire declared their love for each other on FaceBook did they? Did they REALLY? I don't think so somehow!😂

Indecisive81 · 24/10/2024 19:17

I think bianca will eventually wake up and leave of her own accord.

JollyZebra · 24/10/2024 19:37

Don't give them a second thought. Some people love the chaos and drama and it's the kids who suffer.

Dinkydo12 · 24/10/2024 21:37

Butt out mind your own. It's nothing to do with you.

Rudicoolcat · 24/10/2024 22:39

Scissor · 21/10/2024 23:17

Now don't go dragging Flo into this. She's been a right one!
And Eric should just hang his head.
It's Chlamydia I feel sorry for, she's never been the same since the tablets.

😂

Createausername1970 · 24/10/2024 22:42

Bianca should go back to Rickeeeeee

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 24/10/2024 22:43

I answered this thread this other when you numbered them all. Whatever I said then stands

Crazyoldladywithcats · 25/10/2024 11:37

Agree you should keep right out of it. What's your REAL reason for wanting to stick your nose in and stir the pot. You will probably be the one they all fall out with. I used to have a friend like you. Emphasis on the used to have

Twointhehand1 · 25/10/2024 17:20

My Heads fell off 🤣

RoxyRoo2011 · 25/10/2024 17:20

You’re not being unreasonable but you can’t get involved with any of this. The messenger always gets shot. Just keep out of it and make sure you’re there for Bianca when the shit inevitably hits the fan.

1983Louise · 25/10/2024 18:09

I think they all deserve each other...........

NeckolasCage · 25/10/2024 18:13

AlmostAJillSandwich · 21/10/2024 23:34

Bianca made her bed, she was well aware of what he was like and didn't care when it was her taking him off another woman, and doing the dirty herself on her previous partner. What goes around comes around, more fool her having kids with him, she must have known it would end like this.

Or she was deluded to think she was special and such a prize he wouldn't do it to her. Once a cheat, always a cheat.

Edited

RICKAAAAAAAH!!!

Fargo79 · 25/10/2024 18:22

Seems like everyone involved knows exactly what kind of person he is. Their choice to stay in a relationship with him/stay friends with him. Just mind your own beeswax.

sarah419 · 25/10/2024 19:39

not your business nor your problem

itsmabeline · 25/10/2024 19:40

Stop being friends with Adam.

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