“Miss” and “Sir” in schools

[MyCleverGrayBear]

Been to lots of secondary school open days recently. At the state secondaries the children showing parents around etc called the teachers “Sir” and “Miss”. Is that normal? I haven’t heard this IRL ever.

(To be clear, “Miss, this parent wants to know about languages at school” vs “Mrs Jones, this parent would like to see the sports centre”. But also in a couple of classrooms there were children constantly saying “Miss, look at this, Miss, I’ve out the sign up, Miss, shall I stand here” etc and it was incredibly grating.)

And why are female teachers “Miss” and make teachers “Sir”? I felt like I was in a bad 80’s Grange Hill episode and Benny Hill was about to run in and chase me 🫣

I’m old. We did Miss and Sir too.
Edit: on top of that I was a teacher for 35 years in a range of schools across England and Wales, state and independent, and it was the case in every one of those too.

^ this

It's normal is all the schools I've worked in and the school I went to. If they know I'm. Mrs surname but if they don't then I'm 'Miss'. Or sometimes just because it's quicker than the full name.
Men are always Sir
I agree it's a bit wierd but missus doesn't sound right. Some schools use marm. I think you're overthinking it.

I've even used miss or sir when referring to another member of staff when talking to students.

Better than being called Mum which I often get at work !

I also think Miss / Sir have lost their original meaning (marriage/status) in schools, and just identify male and female.

Sir & Mam in my sons school

I love being called Miss and I do find it respectful. I know it's not an equivalent to Sir but it is really, in the context of a school. 'Thanks, Miss,' is a lovely phrase to hear and I absolutely know that the students who say that mean it respectfully when I've just helped them with something, or listened to them. Omitting the Miss or Sir...now that is rude - I insist on the Miss when eliciting a 'yes, Miss,' etc after a telling off. Those students also know it denotes respect just as much as Sir does, which is why they choose to withhold it in those circumstances.

Now random students saying 'Excuse me, I don't know your name...' would piss me right off. Thank fuck kids at my school don't say that.

I wouldn’t use a name/title. Bump into a teacher you don’t know? “Oh, excuse me” no need for anything else. Or “oh, excuse me Mrs…” trail off and hope the teacher says “Mrs Gray. Don’t worry.”

It's the same in every school I know about.

Ah I hadn't thought of mistress. Either way, point remains.

Do you know how many teachers/TAs/Lab assts/Techs/Admin etc staff there are in a school with 1500+ pupils?

I remember reading earl spencers book.

He said that in his private school he was told to call all matrons

"Please".

Like, the word please as their name.

Normal in the state sector, not so much in independent schools. I agree it sounds ugly and also is sexist. The female equivalent of sir is ma'am, not the rather juvenile-sounding miss. Plus, as you say, how hard is it to use names anyway (unless an individual teacher is genuinely unknown to the child)?

They learn their teachers names? Is it that hard? My son has 15 teachers. He learned their names by week 2. They’re written on his timetable etc and online. It’s just courtesy. Just as most of his teachers learned his name by week 2.
Like I said, the young people do know their teachers name but it's just a short handed way of addressing them.

I remember going to parents evening and Ds1 saying ' mr Johnson wants to talk about the project I'm doing with Will' we walked into the xlass room and ds said ' alright sir' ( we are northern, thats how we say hello!!)
Why do you think it's an issue?

I also find it grating and implicitly sexist. Not sure if ma’am would be better 😂 Basically we don’t have a good generic way to address women that sounds ‘everyday respectful’, which says a lot about our culture!

Yes it normal. Calling the teacher Mrs wouldn’t sound polite (sounds too much like missus).

Has someone been offended by it then?

I think where children are taught by a specific teacher they should use their name, but for all the random ones they just come across, Sir and Miss is just fine.

Perfectly normal. I've been teaching for over 40 years. I've been Miss all that time. It's perfectly respectful.
Where I teach there are 1,850 students and 150 teachers plus other adults. No-one knows everyone's name!

'Sir' is so old fashioned.

It's not used anywhere else today.

In the 90s (in Scotland) we increasingly used Miss and Sir as we got older and also used it more the better we knew a teacher. It was used as a less formal term than Mrs X, almost the equivalent of their first names. We wouldn’t use it with teachers we didn’t like.

Yes of course, I'm a male teacher, a physics teacher as it happens with a PhD in physics, and I am referred to as Sir.

Its the normal salutation for a male teacher regardless of qualification, Miss for female regardless of marital status or qualification title.

Its a polite professional thing to do in a school.

If the full name is being used then it would be Mr, Mrs, Miss, Ms, Dr. xxxxxx as appropriate.

Been normal in UK schools forever in a day.

Yes, it's normal.

Just because it's used everywhere doesn't mean it's normal.

We all know it happens everywhere. It happened to all of us during our own schooldays.

I think it's weird.

An argument against here!
amp.theguardian.com/education/2023/jun/06/london-school-drops-sir-and-miss-honorifics-to-fight-cultural-misogyny

I couldn’t get used to that. Kid puts their hand up and says miiiiiiiss! That’s normal to me 😁

Re all female teachers being single pre 1944 that was 1958 in Ireland! No coincidence my mother, a teacher, did not get married until 1958, she wasn't giving up her job for anyone!