To not want to work with someone because...

[Digitaldedado]

They can't spell my name correctly. A service provider has engaged with me at work and he can't spell my name right - multiple emails, not once has he got it right.
My name is in my email. I find it so off putting, it shows a lack of care. AIBU not to engage with him because of this, or am I being petty?
His level of service is pretty average at best, and I'm not tied to a PSA.

My name can be spelt three ways and even collegues I've worked with for over 8 years misspell regularly. Many time the excuse is they were thinking of their good friend that spells it the other way.
Internally it drives me nuts but I just ignore it. In the grand scheme of things it's not a major problem.
If you don't like it point it out. If it continues, and you can afford not to deal with them, end it.

I think you’ll find it’s Chanandler Bong - your misspelling shows a lack of respect!

I agree though, OP, this would annoy me too.

I have a "difficult" name (unusual, not difficult) and I frequently get misspelled when people are sending me emails.

I judge the person - they're too stupid to read the email address they are sending it to and use that spelling rather than their own fantasy spelling.

I think it is lazy of people not to double-check that they got someone's name spelt correctly in work emails.

Just point out the correct spelling in your next email.

I have worked mainly in London where you have people from all over the world and British people from different ethnic backgrounds so I always wanted to make sure I was careful to spell and pronounce their name correctly.

It is just basic courtesy.

Throughout my life perfectly intelligent and professional people have spelt my name incorrectly. It happens to us all. You can choose to be bothered about this or choose not to be.

I've got a name which has quite a few spellings - and is one letter from being a different name. I don't really mind if it's one of the official or made-up spellings of my name but don't like it when it's clear they think it's the other name.

I had a senior guy at work do this

He was mids 40s/ early 50s pale male and stale, i was mid 20s a woman and good/ambitious

Hi clarissa
hi georgia
Hi emily
etc.
Not even remotely CLOSE to my name

So i would witte
Hi rupert
Hi philippe
Hi balonz
Etc.
To him.

He came over towards the end of week fucking raging and barely supressing it and raised it while my big boss was there.
I managed to look totally shocked offended and the absolute victim. It helped i stayed seated while.he stood

I explained to big boss i found it strange too and had only done this as it was dickheads preference. 🤭🤭🤭🤭
he had sent multiple emails "To" random names that were not me and when i flagged he was sending me emails in error (ie he sent an email intended for emily) he had rudely told me no it was for me.... thus i understood this to be an affectionate quirk on his part and to be polite given his seniority i reciprocated despite finding it veryyyy unusual.
Poor me...

Big boss was slack jawed
Dickhead floundered and stuttered a bit
big boss was like "maybe we should all.just use actual names"
I was like " YEP! Sounds good to meeeee"

Ok, so it doesn’t bother you, but it bothers a lot of other people, who will always consider it to be a rude thing to do. Every one makes spelling and grammatical mistakes, including me, from time to time, and I personally would never point out any of these, as i usually know what they meant, and/or what they wanted to convey. But to use the incorrect spelling, of someone’s name, day in, day out, especially if it’s written in front of you, is disrespectful.

Crown her

This is one of the reasons why I dispair when looking at the baby name threads and the op wants to give their child a name with a odd / weird name or spelling .
Can I name my child zxilt pronounced Bob ?

It's frustrating when you constantly have to spell your name out or correct the pronunciation.

Does the "people on MN are incredibly thick sometimes" also extend to those who spell your name wrong when it's right in front of them?

Not everyone who can't spell is Dyslexic.

It's not petty. Once can be a genuine mistake. After that it's just rude.

Tell him he has spelt it wrong, ask him to get it right and move on to someone else.

I am actually dyslexic, therefore I am especially conscious of spelling a name correctly. It is not difficult to cut and paste the name from the individuals email address. It common courtesy to spell someone’s name correctly. I recently was writing wedding invitations by hand. used a pencil to ensure I could correct mistakes. Then went over it the name with pen.

Not petty at all. There are two options - its either lack of care/sloppiness, or it's a subtle dig/power play. Neither are good.

I get the impression it's a power play. He is constantly someone who tells me about his extensive knowledge of my industry. (He is new to it, having moved sectors)
He is trying to build up a network and in my opinion should be on the front foot trying to build a good rapport.
The way he spells my name is the male spelling, not traditionally the female.
I'm a woman in a very male industry.
Also answers the phone to me - Hi mate.

Happens to me all the time 😂 It’s not even difficult to spell. One of those things, nothing to worry about.

Hi Mate? How professional!

I deal with people like this in my industry. They think these kinds of behaviours (the ones you mention other than getting your name wrong) are good “business development”. I would so love it if you actively told him that these behaviours are what has caused you not to choose to use him as service provider 😄

And PS, he should be able to get your name right

I'd worry about his lack of attention to detail, as it's right there in front of him.

My favourite one was years ago when someone (a quasi client) called up and had a massive go at one of our admin team because his company's name was wrong on a letter (they'd written limited not LLP). I decided it was a good time to point out he has been consistently spelling my name wrong on every letter he'd sent me.

If it upsets you that much speak to him and let him know the correct spelling but I wouldn’t get to het up about it.

But OP, if this is irritating you and you gave no reason to keep using him, completely fine to stop. Sounds like it's part of a bigger issue.

Point it out next time he does it “didn’t you know Lesley is the male spelling, I’m Leslie - thought you’d know that, mate.” or whatever.

BTW, my RL name is Oonagh. I often have emails back to Ooangh Oonah and Oonargh, which I don’t mind. It’s when they call me Una even though they’re replying to an email from Oonagh that I get a bit cross.