Why are teachers so rude?

[Van34]

I will preface this by saying I do not have kids and therefore my last interaction with teachers was when I was at school. I'm not going to let my teenage years cloud my judgement.

I have recently taken on a job that involves visiting schools (think cleaning supervisor, but not) I spend a couple of hours walking round with the team, talking about challenges, reviewing paperwork and doing a general checks. I don't have to interact with the teaching staff at all (thank god). But I find them so rude. They think nothing of just butting in mid conversation, no "sorry, I can see your talking, could I just ask X a question" they just start talking. They stare with a frown constantly and consistently. They don't thank you or the children for holding doors open for them. And they never smile back if you smile at them...

It takes me back to being at school all those years ago and now I wonder if it wasn't just me hating the place. I wonder if the teachers were all like that too.

This isn't an isolated incident. I travel to many schools and they are all the same...

I know a few teachers socially (friends/family/acquaintances) and regardless of whether or not they’re nice people generally (most of them are) they do have this air of superiority about them so I can totally imagine them butting into conversations and not thanking people for holding doors open. I think it’s because they’re used to bossing students round all day it becomes part of their personality. I also think that it’s a stressful job which probably makes them quite frustrated and miserable most of the time.
However from meeting teachers through my children being in school I know that there are also loads of really, really lovely ones who are kind, polite, friendly and go out of their way to help their students.
But yes generally I know exactly what you mean op.

I don't think you need to be rude though! Lots of jobs are similar, not just teaching (thinking of places like Starbucks and Tesco when it's manic).

You can be busy but still have manners.

I think what you're experiencing is people suffering from stress. You are seeing at first hand the effect of cuts on the humans who work in education.

I overheard some young teachers talking a couple of years ago about having to wash a child's clothes and feed them. They each said there were kids they wish they could take home and care for.

One of my friends - a supply teacher - said she turns up at schools that do not have the basics - stationery, books etc.

The effect of stress on kids is also overwhelming and who gets the brunt of it? The Teachers! They experience verbal and physical aggression from students and parents (who retaliate when teachers try to calm their kids).

Teachers these days are childminders, prison guards, law enforcement...

We should be praising our teachers, not castigating them. In fact, we should be standing on doorsteps and giving them a round of applause every week to give them a boost.

Nail on the head!

Former teacher here. I think that sometimes teachers spend so much time with children, that they start acting like them!

As a parent I've also been on the receiving end of letters that are so unnecessarily combative from the first communication and I wonder how these have been written by people whose job is literally to communicate.

That said, I've also known some really kind and wonderful teachers.

Like most public facing roles, there are some people who really shouldn't be in them, who seem to actively hate the people they are being paid to assist. I think teaching might be one of professions where it's possible to stay too long and become cynical and cold.

This.

I think it’s the culture of teaching. You’re always running at 100 mph just to stand still. If you need an answer to a question you pop into the person who can answer it, then crack on. There are always people dropping in and out of meetings and it’s just the way it is!
Your post is unpleasant and unnecessary and certainly does not project the image of the kind, friendly professional you say you are.

The issue is not rudeness on one side or another. The issue is a lack of appreciation of the privilege of being allowed into a school during its operating hours.
Every person working in a school has workload beyond their actual capacity. And that includes whatever member of school staff who accompanies you in the building on your work visits. If teachers keep running up to them with urgent questions, then that person who is giving you their time must be fairly senior.
So by you entering the school you are taking a senior member of staff away from hundreds of micro obligations to do with running the school safely and happily.
I don't think anyone is being rude. They are doing their jobs.
Whereas you too are doing your job, but are a guest on the actual premises, and by definition are preventing them doing their jobs. They can't let you in there alone. It's a school. You take a whole member of senior staff for your one hour.
Had you thought of scheduling your visits out of school operational hours?
No?
Do you leave with an apology for taking their time away from more immediate stuff?
No?
Seriously? Teachers are rude by working in the way they normally work?
Know your place. You are a guest.

I don't recognise this at all.

I used to believe this axiom, but now I don't. I have experienced life as a fat person and as a thin person. As a (very) fat person I would say that most people treated me quite poorly - dismissive etc, and then when I became slim it changed completely. On some occasions the same person (often male) who had been dismissive and uninterested would suddenly become attentive and interested in me. I suppose you could say that I was the problem (I was fat and should have lost weight?)

So, while I don't agree with what op has said, I am not sure that it's about her. I believe what she says, but I am not sure that she is seeing what is really going on in schools and why people behave the way they do as a result.

One teacher appeared to be rude, not all teachers. They were were most likely really busy and didn’t have time for niceties. Sorry but you’re overthinking this.

i've been in and out of a few schools as a pupil, as a parent, and as a temp teaching assistant, reading mentor and youth mental health first aider.

Are ALL teachers rude? No...
There are rude people who are teachers, and there are stressed/rushed teachers who may not be the most polite, but not ALL teachers are rude.

I've met my fair share of school staff who can be abrupt, abrasive, superior, and yes, on occasion, bloody rude, most of it i will let slide as you can see the abrupt stuff is because they're overworked and harassed.

There are a couple i have made complaints about because they were so rude to me (both as a parent and as a temp staff member) for no real reason.. i get people have shitty days, but that doesn't excuse them using me or anyone else as their emotional punch bag.

I think making sweeping statements like your OP is rude tbh.. people are not an homogenous mass, they're individuals and some will be rude, and others not.

I’ve known lots of teachers, they’re not usually rude but they are abrupt and definitely bossy - skills that they perhaps need.

My dd wanted to be a teacher and I successfully put her off. She’s got a lovely job now, still dealing with schools and says teachers accompany the pupils to the event where dd has to give a talk and invariably teachers will butt in and interrupt the talk which is dd’s area of expertise. She has learned to shut them down.

Agree!
My polite little DD who always says please and thank you has stopped since she started reception and I can only assume this is because she isn't hearing anyone say those words to her! She will role play schools with me in the evenings and the way she speaks playing the 'teacher' is blunt and pretty rude by our standards!

Prefacing a conversation with ‘sorry to interrupt’ takes 2 seconds.

I was a nurse, I know what busy is.

I agree and they are so bloody patronising. I recently highlighted that my son would be triggered by something at the time of Gcse exams and the teacher replied “well we can’t change the date of the exam”. No shit Sherlock.

My husband is school support staff and my mum worked as school support staff and they’ve both experienced what you’ve mentioned.

Its 50:50 some teachers really lovely and chatty to support staff but other literally look down their noses at them as those they are superior.

Oh yes let’s blame her teachers for her not saying please and thank you anymore 😆😆😆😆

I have a peripatetic job that takes me into lots of schools.

Some schools just have a 'culture' that is, as has been said, abrasive. Most secondary schools are absolutely toxic places (as evidenced by the current attendance crisis, one in five kids can't cope with being in them).

I something it's just teachers though, I've met some really rude pastoral staff.

I think unless you've done any job you probably don't understand it fully. I don't think time pressure is exclusive to teaching though. I've heard GPs and nurses say they're so busy they don't get time for the toilet.

Good post.
They always have been.
Obviously I'm ancient, however in my time they just took their own failures and frustrations on the kids.
(Another country).

I’ve met a fair share of teachers through DC schools and, of course, some are arseholes. The majority have been lovely.

You seem to have a very blanket view - are you sure you’re not the problem?

I don't know. I think that the school environment is rather toxic. I was once in a lesson when the history teacher was talking about feudal system. He related the system to the school environment. The headteacher as the king, the SLT as nobility, the teachers as the soldiers and the cleaning staff and TA''s as the peasants. I was absolutely horrified. I'm not sure he realised the impact of his lesson on the kids behaviour or his colleagues.

I think saying all teachers are rude is a massive generalisation. I know lots of very lovely teachers. However, some are absolute arseholes. Obviously, being overworked, exhausted and never getting a break doesn't help. That mixed in with the shitty environment is just a bad mix.

Yes, teachers are just one homogenous mass of frowning and interruptyness.

Definitely ALL cunts.

🙄

Have you considered the possibility that they're wary and mistrusting of people who swoop in and 'check paperwork' for good reason?

And I’ve met some really rude doctors and nurses. I wouldn’t ever start a blanket post asking why they are all rude though.

Some people are arses, whether they are parents, dentists, physiotherapists, cleaners or traffic wardens.