Christmas childcare!

[Christmaschildcare]

Before I had children, I thought parents wanted Christmas off because of the ‘magic’ of Christmas with children. I’m sure some do but I now realise it’s mostly because THERE’S NO FLIPPING CHILDCARE OPTIONS AVAILABLE

I have three children under six. Their school is (naturally) closed, their nursery is closed. There are no holiday clubs in our area open whatsoever. We have no one to ask - everyone either works or is in same boat as us so cannot look after THREE CHILDREN for us.

We need to find cover for two weeks. My dh can take a week, and I can take a week, so we’re lucky that we can plan to share.

but even that has been an issue for both employees. We’ve both been told we ‘need to do our part’ and ‘can’t expect to be off just because you’ve got kids’ and ‘well it needs to be fair to everyone’ etc etc.

while I agree with this in theory - in practice, what on Earth am I supposed to do for childcare? If my employer says I can’t take the week off - well, unfortunately, I will be, as I can’t leave three children at home. I’m not being difficult, I genuinely have nowhere and no one to send them to. I wish I did.

is there some magical Christmas childcare solution I’m missing? Please enlighten me 😩

@Christmaschildcare is it every year or does your work set up rotas so it's even across the years?

My DH make sure we do alternate weeks/days so we have cover but also I don't mind taking my turn. Other colleagues have different caring responsibilities which are difficult during the Christmas period too and in my team I have a small minority of colleagues who take the biscuit so ours is changing to a rota system as well.

I hear you OP. It was a surprise to find the lack of childcare options during the Christmas period. I ended up looking for a more family friendly employer and request a partial term time/part time contract. (Last two weeks in August and Xmas) as this is when there were no other childcare options. Also would book my AL as early as possible to get the dates I needed and may have said I was out of the country on holiday to get continuous leave. The reality is that your colleagues do not really care about your situation and you have to work out how to make employment work for your family.
I also had a little savings pot to cover unpaid parental leave days. ( I tended to use these for longer sick days needed e.g. chicken pox).

Yes - some years I am simply not allowed the leave as we all must take turns. So maybe every 3rd year, I had to with over Christmas. DH took time when he could but sometimes we had to pay for a nanny using an agency. It was £££ but the only option.

I'm rural and still found an agency nanny. Where do you live that there's no options at all?

I agree. Honestly, students are either back and don't need/want to work on the 27th December or they're working Christmas shifts in retail already. A lot of them are seeing their own family whether they like it or not!

Where do you live that you don't have babysitters?

Contact a nanny agency and hire a short term nanny.

Nanny is your only solution as others have said - advertise on Nannyjob.com, childcare.co.uk, Bubble and contact all the big agencies. There are loads of qualified nannies in the UK who don't even celebrate Christmas and who (for the right price) would undoubtedly be happy to cover - depending on how rural you live you may need to provide accommodation/pay for their transportation.

Don't disagree that childcare in this country is a PITA and outrageously expensive and it's tough when you have no family or friends to help in an emergency, I've been in that situation many times but you just need to throw money at it, no other way, if your job is important to you. I sympathise but at the same time YABU if you expect your employer to accommodate you as it's not their problem and not fair to the rest of the team - everyone wants Christmas off kids or no kids and as a manager of a large team I absolutely wouldn't prioritise leave requests based on who can or can't find childcare solutions. I've had an employee previously threaten to leave if I didn't accommodate their Christmas request and I told them to go ahead - short term it would cause more disruption yes, but on principle I'm not going to prioritise leave requests based on perceived need/personal circumstances as long term it builds resentment within the team.

I’m surprised that someone thinks that you are unreasonable.
Can you just try to push at work showing that you’ve explored all possible options and there is nothing in the area and your DH is using his leave as well.
I would double check legal side carefully. If unpaid leave is an option I would take it.

Yes, there's a tendency on here to always assume someone's available and willing. Just get an emergency nanny, a convenient student, a friend. But the fact is, working over Christmas just isn't that popular. People have preferences and there are also significant structural barriers like public transport access. People are away from home more than they are on any random day during the year. Support networks look different to usual.

In my case, it's never been an issue because we have loads of family and don't do the 2 x FT working model anyway. But it should be very obvious why it's a problem for some parents.

This is why my friend whose kids are a bit older (8 and 10) employs a neighbour's teenage daughter (she's about 17) to look after her girls in the holidays.

Obviously they know the teenager and her parents really well. And while it isn't an ideal solution, it works for them as they get affordable and trustworthy childcare and the teenager gets money from a holiday job.

Yours are probably too little for a similar set up but something like this could perhaps be an option when they're older?

It’s really parental leave or change jobs. Or else go sick. Those are the only options I can think of. Best of luck.

No it doesn't. An employer can't refuse it as long as sufficient notice is given.

www.acas.org.uk/parental-leave

Any friends or neighbours with uni aged kids back over the Christmas period who would like to make a bit of cash?

I run a (sort of) holiday club. Every school holiday except Christmas. Why? Because I tried it and lost money because so many people aren't interested. That year I had to actually pay to look after others kids! Supply and demand.
Yes, there's many jobs which you need to work over Christmas, but there's many many more who shut down so that everyone can be with their families.

Don’t live rurally but honestly, the options most people are suggesting are just not available here. It’s not that I don’t want to pay a babysitter, childminder, nanny etc - it’s that I can’t find one! And honestly no wonder.

Anyone staff at the nursery looking for some work over the Christmas break?

My nursery isn’t term time so doesn’t close for more than a couple of day, however we typically take off what would be school holidays anyway so it will be the same when oldest is in school next year.

I'm a lone parent.

When DS was at primary I had a job that closed over Christmas (manufacturing factory). Last day of work was 23rd December and we went back on 2nd Jan.

The school holiday club was open after new year's day so I only had to find cover for the days before Christmas eve that school was shut. I had to ask my elderly grandfather to look after DS unfortunately. I had nobody else who could help.

We have no family to help either. This is the reason why we had a childminder for wraparound care from age 4 to 10. The dc went for a few days every half term, Xmas and a lot more in the summer.

This was a conscious decision from when dc were v young - they started there when dd1 started reception. I knew we couldn't guarantee holiday clubs to cover when we needed it, and I can never get half term off, DH the odd day. It has worked well for us.

It’s actually quite upsetting because fairness in general is genuinely one of my core values. It isn’t fair for me to be prioritised over others because I have children. But if I can’t source childcare, despite my best efforts, I’m always going to choose the safety of my children over the principle of fairness- as I presume the vast majority would?

I hate the replies on here basically saying either quit your career or rewind the clock and don't have children. Idiots. In countries where it is better to be a woman employers and employees understand there is a short time in employees' lives when they sometimes have to leave early or have holiday that matches the the school holidays. This helps staff retention and nurtures the future workforce.

You situation sounds pretty challenging. I get it as we have family support and friends have jobs and their hands full already. My only suggestion is a nanny agency and pay travel expenses but it would cost a fortune.

My area is generally excellent for holiday childcare with the exception of Christmas. We are up shit creek this year due to how the dates have fallen as there is very little open for the week of the 30th and we’ve not got much leave left.

I have found two days where I can get some childcare locally and I was incredibly relieved as thought it would be 0. I then need to decide what I do for my other 2 days whether i try and wfh with the kids, do some childcare swaps with friends or see if can swap some planned leave from later in the year.

I can well believe it. So many jobs are term time only too, as well as those with Christmas shutdowns.

We use holiday clubs sometimes, so I'd be a potential customer. And thinking about it, there's only one weekday I might even possibly want a holiday club over the two weeks my DC are off. Between the bank holidays, going away to see family and a couple of things I already have booked, there's not a lot of time left.

Your bosses sound like idiots

What should happen is you both take time off to cover the holiday

But request parental leave first.

If you're in no danger of being fired then what's the problem? Just don't go into work.