How far away are you from your parents?

[Starvingbutnothingin]

Driving time wise?

Currently live abroad, but want to move back to be closer to my parents, now they’re getting a little older. We’ve seen a great job for Dh (my job is much easier to find in every area, Dh’s not so much) it’s 30 minutes drive from my parents, is this close enough? I was hoping to be close enough to just nip over when needed and for them too, is 30 minutes a bit far or average?

15 minutes from my parents and I'm sad to admit this but they've got impossible to deal with over the last year and a half and I feel ill when I go round dealing with them so not far enough I'm actually considering moving slightly further away. In laws a few minutes

We are 8 miles from my parents (15 - 20 minutes in the car depending on traffic; we can walk to PILs in about 20 minutes. Honestly it sounds lame but being close to parents has been a game changer for us and we feel really connected to the area because of it.

The biggest thing has been being able to see them on weeknights casually which takes pressure off weekends, as well as be spontaneous.

About an 8 hour plane ride and a 4.5 hour drive to their home.

We lived 20 minutes drive away from grandparents growing up. My mother’s parents eventually moved in when they couldn’t care for themselves but it became too much and eventually her father has to be placed in a nursing home nearby.

Not moving back and parents know and don’t expect us to. My father doesn’t even want a funeral or us to come over when he does pass someday.

I reckon 30mins is the perfect distance. Near enough to pop over very regularly, far enough that you both feel you have your own space.

My mum is 2 minutes walk away as she lives in the next road. See her three or so days a week, often more. She pops around here too. We talk at least once on the phone each day.

Mum still lives in my hometown, which is 2.5hrs drive, whereas PIL are 20mins away in the neighbouring town, I love them but any closer would irritate me as I like having a distance.

I wish I could be closer to my mum and move back to my hometown, however life circumstances means we are unlikely to move in the near future (property prices are higher where mum lives, we have good jobs and are near PIL). DP is happy to visit mum any time I like as well so it would be a bit dumb to up sticks when we have a good quality of life here. Mum still works, however I wouldnt be surprised if she moves closer when she retires as her brother is only an hour from me.

I'm 2 hours. It felt a very long way during Covid when my brother could do doorstep visits to my parents and I couldn't. But I was the one to move away 30 years ago. Maybe when my daughter doesn't need or want to see her dad regularly, I can consider moving my life back. 30 minutes drive sounds fine - any closer would be claustrophobic for me.

❤️

10 mins. I think I could manage 30-40 mins away but I'm way too attached (probably too much) to live any future r

8 minutes’ drive

I drive right past the house on my way to and from work so pop in most days. If it was same distance but in the opposite direction then I probably wouldn’t pop in as much.

Mine have, and it’s so much easier. If there is something ”wrong” with the tv (pressed a few wrong buttons) it’s a 4-5 min drive. But…stuck in the bath!? 😂😩

Dh’s mum is 24 hrs on the plane away, 48 hours door to door.

Yes bless her, she has an electric seat thing to lift her out of the bath but she forgets to charge it and DH has to go round and lift her out.

6 to 7 hours. It breaks my heart now they're elderly, I wish I could help them more.

Google maps doesn't give me a drive time, but says 131 days of walking...

Different planet

I was about 25mins drive from parents - both now deceased - which was easily doable. Having said that, neither of them ever got to the stage where I had to be there asap.

45 minutes drive. DBro is ten minutes away by car. He helps more than I do.

Put a note on the bath tub to remind her to charge it. But I know, my parents keep thanking us how much our help means to them, but usually it’s only the little things which means a lot to them. They have always helped us with our children and so much else, so we are forever thankful for that.

Driving time - 36 hours, not counting the time for two ferries (just one ferry if I take a longer driving route.

I wish I was closer to my parents but I never want to move back to the UK so they'd have to move here and my dad could not cope with that. But I have 4 brothers back in the UK, they will have to help them, especially the one that still lives at home.

Half an hour's walk uphill to my mum and 20 minutes walk back. I see her most days because I'm her carer. Even if I wasn't her carer I'd see her a few times a week.
My dad died over 10 years ago.

These threads are always quite startling in how different families are. I can't imagine going weeks without seeing my mum. My brothers manage it for months. My sister manages every couple of weeks with a 15/20 minute drive (6 miles away).

Walking distance

Next village so 5 -10 minutes drive depending on the swing bridge. See them once or twice a week.
My DC and family live next door despite me doing everything to encourage them to see the world, unlike me so now I'm looking forward to being cared for in my dotage.
Can you buy somewhere a bit nearer to them and DH have a slightly longer commute. Mine used to be about 20-30 minutes on mainly country roads and wasn't too onerous.

😂

I live a 15 minute drive from DM - she’s in the east of the city, I’m in the south. Furthest I’ve ever lived from her was approx. 45 mins so I suppose I’m a homebird! Interestingly enough I lived literally down the road from her for a year or two, that time period actually ended up being when I saw her the least. Closer together definitely doesn’t always mean more quality time

I live 2 and a half hours away from my mum. 4 hours from pil.