How far away are you from your parents?

[Starvingbutnothingin]

Driving time wise?

Currently live abroad, but want to move back to be closer to my parents, now they’re getting a little older. We’ve seen a great job for Dh (my job is much easier to find in every area, Dh’s not so much) it’s 30 minutes drive from my parents, is this close enough? I was hoping to be close enough to just nip over when needed and for them too, is 30 minutes a bit far or average?

4,500 miles.

10 mins drive from my mum. We were for a while about an hour and half away from DH's parents but his mum has gone back for an extended visit to their home country which is a LONG flight away. I doubt she will come back.

I was also about a 6 hour drive from my dad but he died a few years ago.

I’m a 5 minute drive from my mum and we’re about 20 mins away from DP’s. I used to be over an hour from my mum and much prefer having her closer by.

Just under 2 hours. But it used to be much further, ie a mid-haul flight, so it's all relative. I do worry as they become older but I am resigned to doing a lot of driving.

We’re about 20 mins drive, which is fine to pop in. Starts to feel further if I’m having to do it twice a day (eg drop kids off and collect, or feeding their cat when they’re away) on top of working etc.

So 30 mins sounds fine but it depends on frequency. And whether you’re juggling kids etc too.

If the job is 30 mins from your parents, where could a house realistically be?

3 hours from my dad, 4 hours from my mum. We’re two mins from my PIL but only see them about once a month. 30 mins sounds pretty local and close enough.

24 hour trip minimum.

2.5hr flight, different direction each parent.

Half an hour seems like an OK distance.

My parents are in NZ, I'm in Scotland, so about as far away as you can get. Thankfully have many siblings who'll be able to take care of them when they need it.

We're also about 450 miles away from DH's parents.

Well, impossibly far now they’re both dead, but when the kids were small, around 50 miles which took over an hour. It was too far for babysitting and too far to pop in without including some sort of meal. I’d have preferred half the distance/travel time tbh.

We’re a 7 hour flight away from my parents although DSis and DD are in the same city as them and DS only an hour on the train. We’re an hours flight from DH’s parents - the closest now we’ve been in nearly 30 years.

5 minutes drive from FIL, 7 hours from my parents

75 minutes there or thereabouts. Closest I've lived since leaving home. Both still very capable

It would take longer to get in the car than it would to walk to my parents 🤣

Speaking as someone who before 1998 used to think that when you’re dead that’s it - nothing -

since 1998 I 100% believe that our loved ones who’ve passed are still supporting us - but from a different place now ❤️ and it’s actual experiences that have led me to this conclusion - there have been too many experiences- with too many people who’ve passed - for me not to think this ❤️

Next door

Ten mins by car which is perfect for me. I like to be able to nip in and out without a second thought, or having to plan it in.

If I was 30 mins away I’d probably see my parents once a fortnight or so with the kids and probably once more by myself. I live 3ish hours from my parents as it is. Live 10 mins from FIL but he’s toxic so never see him.

I'm 4 hours away from my parents and I hate it. Would kill for a 30min drive! Would be round all the time!

Ultimately, it doesn't matter how far away anyone else is.

If one of the drivers for you moving back is to be near them and be able to support them, then obviously the closer you are, the easier that becomes, but you also have to consider your own quality of life too.
Half an hour means you can get there, and back during the evening / after work, so it is definitely workable, but presumably you don't have to live at the workplace - so if parents live at point A and the prospective workplace is at point Z which is 30mins away, you have a whole selection of potential places to live anywhere on that line, or indeed radiating off that line.
If you think being on the same street would be easier, then 30mins is not a long commute, but if the area where work is is nicer / fits your lifestyle better, then 30mins isn't a long way to travel to see your parents.

3.5 hours away

30 mins is prob just so you're not in each others pockets. It's the opposite end of the same town really.

I'm 1.5 hours.

Dad died 3 years ago. I'm 10 minutes drive from my mum, it's great.

101 miles, 2 hour drive