dv trigger warning
I have been with DH 7 years, married 1. The first 6 years were amazing. What I would class as I what I previously didn't believe in terms of real life happiness.
The last year we have both had a lot of stress. I lost my job and was struggling for a while (am main breadwinner) and DH went self employed for the first time. Money flow has been tight but okay. I've been in a new job since which earns well and I love for about 10 months now.
I also had a sudden bereavement which I struggled with and DH has had his mother diagnosed with stage 3 cancer.
We get on very well day to day but DH is quite insular and when he does get annoyed and a row starts it gets explosive. During these times he freezes me out and refuses to talk to me for days or weeks. A lot more backstory but that's the gist. I've struggled to cope with this and therefore sought help from a psychiatrist because of the bipolar. The psychiatrist expressed concerns that he was medicating me to deal with DH, instead of my medical condition.
A few of weeks ago, DH went out with friends and come home drunk - don't mind that, is fine. He went straight up to bed instead of saying hi which I thought was odd. I went up to our bedroom to check on and he was awake and on his phone but slurring. I laughed and asked him to pass me his phone (mine was downstairs and we often use each others) so that could show him this funny video of a drunk husband returning home. He immediately started acting weird, said I can't have his phone, went onto his messages ( li could see this from where I was stood) and deleting them. This raises alarm bells and I asked for the phone again. He said no. I tried to then grab it off him and he shoved me off. He then ran down the stairs and I chased him. I reached for the phone again and he threw his arm out and shoved me away. Then ran into the toilet and locked the door. I ended up with a broken nose and broken foot from his shoves.
I was in shock and slept om the sofa. The next day he said he didn't remember anything. I asked him to take me to the hospital as I could not walk, which he did and dropped me off. I couldn't really process what had happened.
We stayed polite but not really together the next couple of weeks. I then had a telephone assessment with the NHS for my bipolar and disclosed that I was struggling to understand that this fight had happened in about 10 seconds and now I had all these broken bones.
It turns out they then referred this and the police tirned up and arrested DH and took him into custody. I was so shocked. I lied my arse off to the police and all the other services and said I fell, or was nothing to do with DH. They released him after 20 hours.
He's now home. He was so angry to start with because he said I must have told someone something. I've told him it's all been a misunderstanding and I love him.
He seems back to normal now and wants to work at things. I want to too. I know this sounds insane but this is not who he is. I want to give it one last chance.
How do I do this?